[2959] in Humor
The Debate
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Brian T Sniffen)
Wed Sep 29 10:10:50 1999
To: humor@MIT.EDU
From: Brian T Sniffen <brians@MIT.EDU>
Date: 29 Sep 1999 10:08:46 -0400
Several centuries ago, the Pope decided that all the Jews had to leave
the Vatican. Naturally,
there was a big uproar from the Jewish community. So the Pope made a
deal. He would have a
religious debate with a member of the Jewish community. If the Jew won
the Jews could stay. If the
Pope won the Jews would leave.
The Jews realized that they had no choice. So they picked an elderly
aged man named Moishe to
represent them. Rabbi Moishe's Latin wasn't very good. In fact, he knew
very little but he was a
man of great faith and well respected in the Jewish community. The pope
agreed. What could be
easier than a silent debate?
The day of the great debate came. Moishe and the Pope sat opposite each
other for a full minute
before the Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers. Moishe looked
back at him and raised one
finger. The Pope waved his fingers in a circle around his head. Moishe
pointed to the ground where
he sat. The Pope pulled out a wafer and a glass of wine. Moishe pulled
out an apple.
The Pope stood up and said, "I give up. This man is too good. The Jews
can stay."
An hour later, the cardinals were all around the Pope asking him what
happened. The Pope said:
"First I held up three fingers to represent the Holy Trinity. He
responded by holding up one finger
to remind me that there was still one God common to both our religions.
Then I waved my finger
around me to show him that God was all around us. He responded by
pointing to the ground and
showing that God was also right here with us. I pulled out the wine and
the wafer to show that God
absolves us from our sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of
original sin. He had an answer
for everything. What could I do?"
Meanwhile, the Jewish community had crowded around Moishe. "What
happened?" they asked.
"Well," said Moishe, "First he says to me, 'You Jews have three days to
get out of here.' So I said
to him, 'Up yours'. Then he tells me the whole city would be cleared of
Jews. So I said to him,
'Listen here, Pope, the Jews . . . we stay right here."
"And then?" asked a woman.
"Who knows?" said Moishe. "He took out his lunch so I took out mine."
