[2404] in Humor
HUMOR: Mac vs PC
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Sharalee M. Field)
Tue Aug 4 09:16:08 1998
Date: Tue, 04 Aug 1998 09:14:48 -0400
To: humor@MIT.EDU, mowu@MIT.EDU, "MEGallagh@aol.com" <MEGallagh@aol.com>,
wheger@wbc-architects.com,
"kris.m.kelly@us.pwcglobal.com" <kris.m.kelly@us.pwcglobal.com>,
jbran18610@aol.com, dunbar@MIT.EDU, dahv@MIT.EDU, rpr@ma.ultranet.com,
mtsai@bqa.com, immer@MIT.EDU, jack.gingras@ae.ge.com,
tlawlor@palmerdodge.com, nkahn@gph.com, GDeVoe@rimco.com,
celia_kent@harvard.edu,
Maryellen Fitzgibbon <mfitzgib@fas.harvard.edu>,
cjwells@fas.harvard.edu,
Cheryl Guarino Buccelli <c_buccelli@harvard.edu>,
leite@fas.harvard.edu
From: "Sharalee M. Field" <sharalee_field@harvard.edu>
>From: yasha@harari.org
>Date: Fri, 31 Jul 1998 20:06:24 -0400
>
>"What ever happened to dry cleaning?"
> -- What "The American People" _really_ want to know about Monica Lewinsky.
>
>Forensically,
>
>Yasha Harari
>yasha@harari.org
>************************************************************************
>
>MAC VS. PC
>
>The software box said I needed "Windows=A9 95 or Better" so I bought a
>Mac.
>
>INTEL INSIDE: The worlds most widely used warning label.
>
>To see tomorrow's PC, look at today's Macintosh. -- BYTE Magazine
>
>"Never ask a man what sort of computer he drives. If it's a Mac, he'll
>tell you. If not, why embarrass him?" -- Tom Clancy
>
>DOS Computers manufactured by companies such as IBM, Compaq, Tandy, and
>millions of others are by far the most popular, with about 70 million
>machines in use wordwide. Macintosh fans, on the other hand, may note
>that cockroaches are far more numerous than humans, and that numbers
>alone do not denote a higher life form. --New York Times, November 26,
>1991=20
>
>I don't do .INI, .BAT, .DLL or .SYS files. I don't assign apps to files.
>I don't configure Peripherals or networks before using them. I have a
>computer to do all that. I have a Macintosh, not a hobby. -- Fritz
>Anderson
>
>"Usually Mac users are able to solve most of their problems without any
>help from us." -- BellSouth ISP Tech Support
>
>Customer: "I'm running Windows=A9 '98." Tech Support: "Yes." Customer: "My
>computer isn't working now." Tech Support: "Yes, you said that." -- Pete
>Zimowski
>
>Windows=A9 98(n) - 32-bit extensions and graphical shell for a 16-bit
>patch to an 8-bit operating system originally coded for a 4-bit
>microprocessor, written by a 2-bit company that can't stand 1 bit of
>competition.
>
>Mac users often swear by their Macs, whereas PC users often swear at
>their PCs.
>
>
>Source: Col. Harry S. Bachstein
>************************************************************************
>************************************************************************
>
>PC USERS SHOUT BACK
>In the spirit of fairness, the
>following is submitted:
>
>
>Mac owners are the type of people who:
>
>-- buy incredibly expensive, glamorous, powerful SUVs but never take
>them any farther off road than the mall parking lot.
>
>-- like to brag about drinking chianti, but inwardly groan at the
>thought of taking another sip of the caustic swill.
>
>-- were the first ones to rush out and join smoking clubs when the cigar
>craze began.
>
>-- subscribe to Scientific American, but can't even decipher the table
>of contents. It makes a great coffee table item in their house.
>
>-- have a son named Cody and a daughter named Brianna. Cody has a
>swimming coach, and Brianna takes interpretive tap lessons.
>
>-- like to drop their Tai Chi lessons into conversations: "You know,
>this morning I was on my way to the Starbucks kiosk right after my Tai
>Chi, and..."
>
>-- have never clipped a coupon in their life.
>
>-- enjoy the snobbery of having the smallest software section in the
>computer store.
>
>-- wear pleated pants.
>
>-- ran out and got the same type of dog Alec Baldwin had in that movie,
>but then told everyone they had theirs first.
>
>-- join Classic Literature book clubs because they like to think the
>postman will be impressed when he delivers their packages.
>
>-- still think it's hip to order quiche in a restaurant.
>
>-- like the security of never having to consider upgrading their system
>by themselves. Ever.
>
>
>Source: J. L. Ruth
>************************************************************************
