[2243] in Humor
Humour: E-mail Junkies
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Sharalee M. Field)
Fri Mar 13 17:21:45 1998
Date: Fri, 13 Mar 1998 17:17:08 -0500
To: humor@MIT.EDU, mowu@MIT.EDU, "MEGallagh@aol.com" <MEGallagh@aol.com>,
wheger@wbc-architects.com, Kris_Kelly@notes.pw.com, jbran18610@aol.com,
dunbar@MIT.EDU, dahv@MIT.EDU, rpr@ma.ultranet.com, mtsai@bqa.com,
immer@MIT.EDU
From: "Sharalee M. Field" <sharalee_field@harvard.edu>
>X-Sender: roquet@pop.fas.harvard.edu
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>Date: Fri, 13 Mar 1998 15:59:29 -0500
>To: sharalee_field@harvard.edu
>From: Dean Roquet <<roquet@fas.harvard.edu>
>Subject: Humour: E-mail Junkies
>
>>>You know you're an E-mail Junkie when ...
>>>
>>>1. You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop to check your
>>>e-mail on the way back to bed.
>>>
>>>2. You get a tattoo that reads "This body best viewed with Netscape
>>>Navigator 3.0 or higher."
>>>
>>>3. You name your child Dotcom.
>>>
>>>4. You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, like you
>>>just pulled the plug on a loved one.
>>>
>>>5. You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on your lap...and
>>>your child in the overhead compartment.
>>>
>>>6. You decide to stay in college for an additional year or two, just for
>>>the free Internet access.
>>>
>>>7. You laugh at people with 14.4 modems.
>>>
>>>8. You start using smileys in your snail mail. : )
>>>
>>>9. Your hard drive crashes. You haven't logged in for two hours. You
>>>start to twitch. You pick up the phone and manually dial your ISP's
>>>access number. You try to hum to communicate with the modem...and you
>>>succeed.
>>>
>>>10. You find yourself typing "com" after every period when using a word
>>>processor.com
>>>
>>>11. You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.
>>>
>>>12. You start introducing yourself as "JohnDoe at CSi dot com."
>>>
>>>13. All of your friends have an @ in their names.
>>>
>>>14. Your cat has its own home page.
>>>
>>>15. You can't call your mother...she doesn't have a modem.
>>>
>>>16. You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it
>>>again.
>>>
>>>17. Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.
>>>
>>>18. You don't know what sex three of your closest friends are, because
>>>they have neutral nicknames and you never bothered to ask.
>>>
>>>19. You move into a new house and decide to Netscape before you
>>>landscape.
>>>
>>>20. You tell the cab driver you live at
>>>"http://1000.edison.garden/house/brick.html."
>>>
>>>21. You start tilting your head sideways to smile.
>
>
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