[1870] in Humor
HUMOR: things you don't want to hear from tech support
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (abennett@MIT.EDU)
Wed Feb 5 11:26:49 1997
From: <abennett@MIT.EDU>
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Wed, 05 Feb 1997 11:05:31 EST
Date: Tue, 4 Feb 1997 21:05:16 -0800
From: Connie Kleinjans <connie@interserve.com>
The Top 12 Things You Don't Want to Hear From Tech Support
12> "Do you have a sledgehammer or a brick handy?"
11> "...that's right, not even McGyver could fix it."
10> "So -- what are you wearing?"
9> "Duuuuuude! Bummer!"
8> "Looks like you're gonna need some new dilythium crystals,
Cap'n."
7> "Press 1 for Support. Press 2 if you're with 60 Minutes.
Press 3 if you're with the FTC."
6> "We can fix this, but you're gonna need a butter knife,
a roll of duct tape, and a car battery."
5> "I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that."
4> "In layman's terms, we call that the Hindenburg Effect."
3> "Hold on a second... Mom! Timmy's hitting me!"
2> "Okay, turn to page 523 in your copy of Dianetics."
and the Number 1 Thing You Don't Want to Hear From Tech Support...
1> "Please hold for Mr. Gates' attorney."
