[1572] in Humor
HUMOR: Election year humor
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (abennett@MIT.EDU)
Wed Aug 28 10:12:54 1996
From: <abennett@MIT.EDU>
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Wed, 28 Aug 1996 10:08:00 EDT
Date: Wed, 28 Aug 1996 00:26:26 -0800
From: connie@interserve.com (Connie Kleinjans)
From: "Karen Kienitz (415)725-5817" <KIENITZ_K@HOSP.STANFORD.EDU>
From: "Jeanne Newman (415)498-5861" <NEWMAN_JE@SHS.STANFORD.EDU>
Subject: Election year humor
The Top 15 Reasons the Democratic Convention Will
Be More Fun Than the Republican Convention
15> Recent poll indicates 87% of registered Democrats know
where to score some killer weed.
14> TV crews don't have to work as hard to find minority delegates.
13> Less chance of party nominee "buying the farm" during
acceptance speech.
12> The Dems will have Pictionary!
11> Hookers discover that, unlike their GOP counterparts,
Democratics actually like sex!
[In the 1994 election year, TIME surveyed the local hookers at both
conventions. Turns out that the Republicans are better tippers. Go
figure. -Drew]
10> Pat "The Black Hole of Fun" Buchanan nowhere in sight.
9> Tipper + Al + Macarena = Dance Inferno!
8> Secret "you know what" party in Jocelyn Elders' room.
7> Al Gore, stoked on corn liquor, dives into the mosh pit.
6> Wacky "I'm with the Unindicted Co-Conspirator" T-shirts.
5> That palpable, all-encompassing air of doom and futility?
It's back in San Diego, pal!
4> Nothing spices up a dull speech like a purloined FBI file.
3> Actually, *ANYTHING* would be more fun than the Republican
convention.
2> With Ted Kennedy in charge of entertainment and Marion Barry
in charge of refreshments? Are you kiddin' me??
and the Number 1 Way the Democratic Convention Will
Be More Fun Than the Republican Convention...
1> Two words: Newt-Kabobs
