[4156] in Humor
[Humor] gsb: **SPECIAL LOCATION** G5 Playroom, 5:30pm (fwd)
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Akhil Shashidhar)
Fri May 21 15:09:52 2004
Date: Fri, 21 May 2004 15:09:18 -0400 (EDT)
From: Akhil Shashidhar <csakhil@MIT.EDU>
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Message-ID: <Pine.GSO.4.55L.0405211509140.22507@nerd-xing.mit.edu>
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---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Fri, 21 May 2004 14:20:52 -0400
From: Mike Oltmans <moltmans@csail.mit.edu>
To: csail-discuss@csail.mit.edu
Subject: gsb: **SPECIAL LOCATION** G5 Playroom, 5:30pm
*** PLEASE NOTE THE SPECIAL LOCATION: G5! ***
PhD THESIS DEFENSE
Public Invited
Title: GSB Leads to Graduation
Speaker: Dan M. Athres
Advisor: Dr. Fraste B. Verage
When: Friday, May 21st, 5:45 pm (refreshments at 5:30)
Where: 32-5 Playroom
Abstract:
In this talk I will present a formal model constructed over the last 6
years that conclusively shows that attendance at GSB directly leads to
graduation. The model is based on a new paradigm of
consumption-production analysis and is based on the most recent data
from graduation records and GSB attendance files. The most striking
evidence is that declining attendance at GSB over the last year has
directly led to the halving of graduates this spring. If current trends
continue our models indicate that GSB will be reduced to one tenth its
current enrollment by 2007 and the number of graduating PhD's will fall
to just one per year. Our models suggest that the only way to reverse
this trend is by boosting attendance at GSB by a minimum of 200%.
Failing to do so will prove detrimental for the graduation hopes of all
PhD students.
Thesis Committee:
Dr. Fraste B. Verage
Dr. Gimme O. Uta-hre
Dr. Drinka N. Walke
Increase your chances of graduating and show up to:
+- -+
girl scout benefit -+- 5:30 pm -+- 32-G5 Playroom
+- ^^^^^ -+
For those coming from elsewhere: Building 32 is
<http://whereis.mit.edu/map-jpg?selection=32>
Once you are in 32, just take the G-elevator to the *5th*
floor and we will be in the lounge that you will be looking at
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