[3436] in Humor
HUMOR: The true story of gefilte fish
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Jonathon Weiss)
Mon Apr 9 04:05:57 2001
Message-Id: <200104090805.EAA17858@Bearing-An-Hourglass.mit.edu>
From: Jonathon Weiss <jweiss@MIT.EDU>
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Mon, 09 Apr 2001 04:05:13 -0400
------- Forwarded Message
Many times I have been upset by people who seem to think that gefilte
fish is some kind of mixture you make in the kitchen rather than one of
God's creatures. This has led me to explain exactly what a gefilte
fish is. So once again, here goes.
Each year as soon as the frost on the Great Gefilte Lakes (located
Upstate New York somewhere in the Catskill Mountains) is thin enough to
break the surface, Frum fishermen set out to "catch" gefilte fish. Now
unlike your normal fish, gefilte fish cannot be caught with a rod and a
reel or your standard bait. The art of catching gefilte fish was handed
down for hundreds, maybe thousands of years. For all I know Moses used to
go gefilte fish catching. I'm sure that the Great Rambam (Maimonides),
when he wasn't busy playing doctor, spent his leisure time gefilte fish
fishing.
Enough already, you say, so how is it done? Well, you go up to the edge of
the lake with some Matzoh. Now this is very important!! It has to be
Shmurah Matzoh or the fish will not be attracted. You stand at the edge
of the lake and whistle and say "here boy," "here boy." The fish just
can't resist the smell of the Matzoh. They come en masse to the edge of
the lake where they jump into the jars and are bottled on the spot.
Again you must remember that there are two kinds of gefilte fish. The
strong and the weak. The weak are your standard fish which are in a loose
"broth" (it is actually the lake water). Now the strong are special. They
seem to be in a "jell." These fish are actually imported from the Middle
East where they are caught in the Dead Sea. They have to be strong to be
able to swim through that "jell."
Last year, a well meaning gentleman tried to correct me by stating,
"Reb, shouldn't they be saying 'Here boychic!'" I didn't have the heart
to tell him, boychic is a Yiddish word and Gefilte Fish don't understand
Yiddish! Only Hebrew and surprisingly, English! There has been a big
debate as to whether to use the Hebrew or English in the US.
With a big break from tradition, shockingly the English is accepted by
almost all gefilte fish fishermen. Some still insist on using the
Hebrew and consider the use of "Here Boy" as Reform and not halachikly
acceptable. However the Congress of OU Rabbis (who have to be present at
the lakes when the fish are bottled) uniformly accept "here boy"!
The time of the catch is very important! The fish cannot be caught before
Purim is over or the fish are considered chametz! Besides, the fish know
when Pesach is coming, and will not respond to the Matzoh before the
proper time. I am still a little bothered by which end of the fish is the
head and which the tail (not to mention that I am not sure where their
eyes are). This is a small price to pay for the luxury of eating this
delicacy.
Have a delicious seder. Happy Passover
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