[2848] in Humor
HUMOR: Parenthood
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Sharalee M. Field)
Thu Jun 10 09:10:19 1999
Date: Thu, 10 Jun 1999 09:08:36 -0400
To: humor@MIT.EDU, mowu@MIT.EDU, "MEGallagh@aol.com" <MEGallagh@aol.com>,
"kris.m.kelly@us.pwcglobal.com" <kris.m.kelly@us.pwcglobal.com>,
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immer@MIT.EDU, jack.gingras@ae.ge.com, tlawlor@palmerdodge.com,
nkahn@gph.com, GDeVoe@rimco.com,
"Jean, Marc (GEAE)" <marc.jean@ae.ge.com>, celia_kent@harvard.edu,
Maryellen Fitzgibbon <mfitzgib@fas.harvard.edu>,
cjwells@fas.harvard.edu,
Cheryl Guarino Buccelli <c_buccelli@harvard.edu>,
leite@fas.harvard.edu, Courtney Nichols <crnichol@fas.harvard.edu>,
wheger@wbc-architects.com, katiel@MIT.EDU, mjv@MIT.EDU, hwebb@MIT.EDU
From: "Sharalee M. Field" <sharalee_field@harvard.edu>
>From: The DAILY DOSE! <yasha@harari.org>
>Date: Wed, 9 Jun 1999 15:39:13 +0200
>
>Yasha Harari
>yasha@harari.org
>http://thedailydose.com
>************************************************************************
>
>HOW PARENTHOOD CHANGES YOUR LIFE
>
>Yes, parenthood changes everything. But parenthood also changes with each
>baby. Here are some of the ways having a second and third child differs from
>having your first:
>
>YOUR CLOTHES:
>1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN
>confirms your pregnancy.
>2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
>3rd baby: Your maternity clothes are your regular clothes.
>
>THE BABY'S NAME:
>1st baby: You pore over baby-name books and practice pronouncing and writing
>combinations of all your favorites.
>2nd baby: Someone has to name their kid after your great-aunt Mavis, right?
>It might as well be you.
>3rd baby: You open a name book, close your eyes, and see where your finger
>falls. Bimaldo? Perfect!
>
>PREPARING FOR THE BIRTH:
>1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
>2nd baby: You don't bother practicing because you remember that last time,
>breathing didn't do a thing.
>3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your 8th month.
>
>THE LAYETTE:
>1st baby: You prewash your newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and
>fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.
>2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only
>the ones with the darkest stains.
>3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?
>
>WORRIES:
>1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up the
>baby.
>2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your
>firstborn.
>3rd baby: You teach your 3-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.
>
>ACTIVITIES:
>1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby
>Story Hour.
>2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
>3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaners.
>
>GOING OUT:
>1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home
>five times.
>2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number
>where you can be reached.
>3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees
>blood.
>
>AT HOME:
>1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
>2nd baby: You spend a bit of every day watching to be sure your older child
>isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
>3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.
>
>
>Source: Mark D. Maier
>************************************************************************
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sharalee M. Field, Planning Analyst
Faculty of Arts and Sciences Planning Office
Harvard University
Ph: 617.495.8257 Fax: 617.495.7881
