[2473] in Humor
HUMOR: New Age Math Test
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Sharalee M. Field)
Tue Sep 29 13:46:47 1998
Date: Tue, 29 Sep 1998 13:41:19 -0400
To: humor@MIT.EDU, mowu@MIT.EDU, "MEGallagh@aol.com" <MEGallagh@aol.com>,
wheger@wbc-architects.com,
"kris.m.kelly@us.pwcglobal.com" <kris.m.kelly@us.pwcglobal.com>,
dunbar@MIT.EDU, dahv@MIT.EDU, mtsai@bqa.com, immer@MIT.EDU,
jack.gingras@ae.ge.com, tlawlor@palmerdodge.com, nkahn@gph.com,
GDeVoe@rimco.com, "Jean, Marc (GEAE)" <marc.jean@ae.ge.com>,
celia_kent@harvard.edu,
Maryellen Fitzgibbon <mfitzgib@fas.harvard.edu>,
cjwells@fas.harvard.edu,
Cheryl Guarino Buccelli <c_buccelli@harvard.edu>,
leite@fas.harvard.edu, david_zewinski@harvard.edu, mendell@setra.com
From: "Sharalee M. Field" <sharalee_field@harvard.edu>
This could just as easily be a "Cambridge Math Quiz".
>> ----------
>>
>Message-ID: <199809291613.MAA04672@copland.udel.edu>
>From: Shirley.Branden@mvs.udel.edu
>To: JBran18610@aol.com
>Subject: new age math test (fwd)
>Date: Tue, 29 Sep 1998 12:10:00 -0400
>
>New Age Math: San Francisco Math Quiz
>
>1. Zelda and Jane were given a rottweiler at their commitment ceremony.
>If their dog needs to be walked two miles a day and they walk at a rate
>of 3/4 mile per hour, how much time will they spend discussing their
>relationship in public?
>
>2. Michael has two abusive stepfathers and an alcoholic mother. If his
>self-esteem is reduced by 20% per dysfunctional parent, but Michael
>feels 3% better for every person he denigrates, how long will it take
>before he's ready to go home if 1 person walks by the cafe every 2
>minutes?
>
>3. Sanjeev has 7 piercings. If the likelihood of getting cellulitis on
>any given day is 10% per piercing, what is the likelihood Sanjeev will
>need to renew his erythromycin prescription during the next week?
>
>4. Chad wants to take half a pound of pot to Orinda and sell it at a
>20% profit. If it originally cost him $1,500 in food stamps, how much
>should Nicole write the check for?
>
>5. The City and County of San Francisco decide to destroy 50 rats
>infesting downtown. If 9,800 animal rights activists hold a candlelight
>vigil, how many people did each dead rat empower?
>
>6. A red sock, a yellow sock, a blue sock, and a white sock are tossed
>randomly in a drawer. What is the likelihood that the first two socks
>drawn will be socks of color?
>
>7. George weighs 245 pounds and drinks two triple lattes every morning.
>If each shot of espresso contains 490mg of caffeine, what is George's
>average caffeine density in mg/pound?
>
>8. There are 4500 homes in Mill Valley and all of them recycle plastic.
>If each household recycles 10 soda bottles a day and buys one polar
>fleece pullover per month, does Mill Valley have a monthly plastic
>surplus or deficit? Bonus question: Assuming all the plastic bottles
>are 1 liter size, how much Evian are they drinking?
>
>9. If the average person can eat one pork pot sticker in 30 seconds,
>and the waitress brings a platter of 12 pot stickers, how long will it
>take five vegans to not eat them?
>
>10. Todd begins walking down Market Street with 12 $1 bills in his
>wallet. If he always gives panhandlers a single buck, how many legs did
>he have to step over if he has $3 left when he reaches the other end and
>met only one double-amputee?
>
>Advanced Placement Students Only:
>11. Katie, Trip, Ling, John-John and Effie share a three-bedroom
>apartment on Guerrero for $2400 a month. Effie and Trip can share one
>bedroom, but the other three need their own rooms with separate ISDN
>lines to run their web servers. None of them wants to use the futon in
>the living room as a bed, and they each want to save $650 in three
>months to attend Burning Man.
>What is their best option:
> a. All five roommates accept a $12/hour job-share as handgun
> monitors at Mission High.
> b. Ask Miles, the bisexual auto mechanic, to share Effie and
> Trip's bedroom for $500/month.
> c. Petition the Board of Supervisors to advance Ling her annual
> digital-artists-of-color stipend.
> d. Rent strike
>
>
