[2456] in Humor
FWD: Live and learn
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Mikhail Khusid)
Wed Sep 16 09:18:13 1998
From: "Mikhail Khusid" <Mikhail_Khusid@notes.teradyne.com>
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Wed, 16 Sep 1998 09:11:55 -0400
Is it funny? No. But oh boy, haven't I seen hundreds of Neuman Marcus cookies, D
isney
vacation and otherwise junk chain letters on this list...
---------------------- Forwarded by Mikhail Khusid/NNH/Teradyne on 09/16/98
09:09 AM ---------------------------
Mark Schleifer <marks@digex.net> on 09/16/98 08:49:57 AM
- -------------------------------
Today was the last straw. I got another copy of the "Disney is going to give
13,000 people a free vacation if this message annoys at least 10% of the
Internet population" spam. I don't know how these things get started, but
I've decided to start my own, and I'm counting on all of you to help pass it
on. You won't get a free copy of Windows98 for doing so, but if enough
copies of the message get out, I will consider NOT killing the last person
who sent me the Disney spam.
The Email Facts Of Life
1. Big companies don't do business via chain letter. Bill Gates is not
giving you $1000, and Disney is not giving you a free vacation. There is no
baby food company issuing class-action checks. You can relax; there is no
need to pass it on "just in case it's true". Furthermore, just because
someone said in the message, four generations back, that "we checked it out
and it's legit", does not actually make it true.
2. There is no kidney theft ring in New Orleans. No one is waking up in a
bathtub full of ice, even if a friend of a friend swears it happened to
their cousin. If you are hell-bent on believing the kidney-theft ring
stories, please see:
http://urbanlegends.tqn.com/library/weekly/aa062997
And I quote: "The National Kidney Foundation has repeatedly issued requests
for actual victims of organ thieves to come forward and tell their stories.
None have. "That's "none" as in "zero". Not even your friend's cousin.
3. Neiman Marcus doesn't really sell a $200 cookie recipe. And even
if they do, we all have it. And even if you don't, see:
http://www.bl.net/forwards/cookie.html
Then, if you make the recipe, decide the cookies are that awesome, feel free
to pass the recipe on - sans the Neiman Marcus story.
4. We all know all 500 ways to drive your roommates crazy.
5. We all know how many Usenet posters it takes to change a
light bulb.
6. Even if the latest NASA rocket disaster(s) DID contain plutonium that
went to particulate over the eastern seaboard, do you REALLY this
information would reach the public via an AOL chain-letter?
7. There is no "Good Times" virus. In fact, you should never, ever, ever
forward any email containing any virus warning unless you first confirm it
at an actual site of an actual company that actually deals with viruses.
Try:
http://www.norton.com/.
8. If your CC: list is regularly longer than the actual content of your
message, you're probably going to Hell.
9. If you're using Outlook, IE, or Netscape to write email, turn off the
"HTML encoding." Those of us on Unix shells can't read it, and don't care
enough to save the attachment and then view it with a web browser, since
you're probably forwarding us a copy of the Neiman Marcus Cookie Recipe
anyway.
10. If you still absolutely MUST forward that 10th-generation message from a
friend, at least have the decency to trim the eight miles of headers showing
everyone else who's received it over the last 6 months.
Pass it on....
------- end -------
