[2220] in Humor
bumper stickers
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Irina Margolin)
Thu Jan 22 10:36:42 1998
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Thu, 22 Jan 1998 10:23:50 EST
From: Irina Margolin <racha@MIT.EDU>
- ------------------------------------------------------------------------
- -------
I could cover my car!
>
> BUMPER STICKERS AND ONE-LINERS
>
> > > Jesus is coming, everyone look busy.
> > > A bartender is just a pharmacist with a
limited inventory.
> > > Horn broken, watch for finger.
> > > The more you complain, the longer God lets
you live.
> > > My kid had sex with your honor student.
> > > If at first you do succeed, try not to look
astonished.
> > > Help wanted telepath: you know where to apply
> > > I.R.S.: We've got what it takes to take what
you've got.
> > > Jesus loves you... everyone else thinks
you're an asshole.
> > > I'm just driving this way to piss you off.
> > > Reality is a crutch for people who can't
handle drugs.
> > > Keep honking, I'm reloading.
> > > Hang up and drive.
> > > Lord save me from your followers.
> > > Guns don't kill people, postal workers do.
> > > Ask me about microwaving cats for fun and
profit.
> > > I said "no" to drugs, but they just wouldn't
listen.
> > > Friends don't let Friends drive Naked.
> > > If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are
they made of
> meat?
> > > Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
> > > Friends help you move. Real friends help you
move bodies.
> > > Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice
doggie!'... till you can
> find a rock.
> > > Sex on television can't hurt you... unless
you fall off.
> > > Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
> > > Cover me. I'm changing lanes.
> > > Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an
idiot.
> > > Montana-At least our cows are sane!
> > > When you do a good deed, get a receipt, in
case heaven is like
> the IRS.
> > > Where there's a will, I want to be in it!
> > > I think my reality check bounced.
> > > Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than
they appear.
> > > He/She who laughs last thinks slowest.
> > > Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes.
> > > Consciousness: that annoying time between
naps.
> > > i souport publik edekasion
