[2155] in Humor
HUMOR CLASSIC: Hell and thermodynamics
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Victor P Morales)
Sun Aug 31 23:58:30 1997
From: Victor P Morales <vicmoral@MIT.EDU>
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Sun, 31 Aug 1997 22:50:09 EDT
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From: Sterling Anthony Shew <sashew@CSUA.Berkeley.EDU>
A true story: A thermodynamics professor had written a take-home exam
for his graduate students. It had one question: Is hell exothermic or
endothermic? Support your answer with a proof. Most of the students
wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law or some variant.
One student, however wrote the following:
First, we postulate that if souls exist, they must have some mass. If
they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are
souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think that
we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave.
Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering hell, let's look
at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these
religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will
go to hell.
Since there are more than one of these religions and people do not
belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all
souls go to hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the
number of souls in hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the
rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for
the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the
mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant.
#1 So, if hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which
souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase
until all hell breaks loose.
#2 Of course, if hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase
of souls in hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until hell
freezes over.
So which is it? If we accept the postulate given me by Therese Banyan
during Freshman year, and take into account the fact that I still have
not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then #2 cannot be true,
and hell is exothermic.
The student got the only A.
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