[2065] in Humor

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HUMOR: Please excuse junior

daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (abennett@MIT.EDU)
Mon May 12 17:13:54 1997

From: <abennett@MIT.EDU>
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Mon, 12 May 1997 17:08:26 EDT

Being a product of the Albuquerque Public Schools, I'd just like to say...

..this is right on the mark. :)
-Drew

------- Forwarded Message

Date: Mon, 12 May 1997 16:44:33 EDT
From: Yelya <yelya@MIT.EDU>

<< School Absence Excuses 
 

 THE FOLLOWING IS A PARTIAL LIST OF ACTUAL WRITTEN EXCUSES GIVEN TO
TEACHERS IN THE ALBUQUERQUE PUBLIC SCHOOL SYSTEM BY PARENTS OF
STUDENTS:
 
 
 
 1.Dear School: Please excuse John from being absent on Jan. 28, 29,
30, 31, 32, and also 33.
 
 2.Please excuse Dianne from being absent yesterday. She was in bed
with gramps.
 
 3.Please excuse Johnny for being. It was his father's fault. 
 
 4.Chris will not be in school because he has an acre in his side. 
 
 5.John has been absent because he had two teeth taken off his face. 
 
 6.Excuse Gloria. She has been under the doctor. 
 
 7.Lillie was absent from school yesterday because she had a going over.

 8.My son is under the doctor's care and should not take fizical ed.
Please execute him.
 
 9.Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was
hit in the growing part.
 
 10.My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent
this weekend with the Marines.
 
 11.Please excuse Joyce from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday she fell
off a tree and misplaced her hip.
 
 12.Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels. 
 
 13.Maryann was absent Dec. 11-16, because she had a fever, sore
throat, headache, and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever
and sore throat, her brother had a low-grade fever. There must be the
flu going around, her father even got hot last night.
 
 14.Please excuse Blanche from jim today. She is administrating. 
 
 15.George was absent yesterday because he had a stomach. 
 
 16.Ralph was absent yesterday because he had a sore trout. 
 
 17.Please excuse Sara for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.

 18.Please excuse Lupe. She is having problems with her ovals. 
 
 19.Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had
diah(*crossed out*), diahoah(*crossed out*), dyah(*crossed out*) the
shits.
  

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