[1685] in Humor
HUMOR: Simple Equations
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Jason D. Hintersteiner)
Tue Nov 5 11:34:40 1996
Date: Tue, 05 Nov 1996 11:23:33 -0500
To: humor@MIT.EDU, sniemczy@MIT.EDU, smabrams@bu.edu
From: "Jason D. Hintersteiner" <jdhinter@MIT.EDU>
>Date: Sat, 02 Nov 1996 10:55:19 -0500
>From: "Nancy C. Gotta" <ncgotta@MIT.EDU>
>>From: ehkst@MIT.EDU
>>From: "Angela Kuo" <AXK23@PSUVM.PSU.EDU>
>>From: Nancy Lin <linnancy@pilot.msu.edu>
>>Subject: simple equations
>>
>>>After applying some simple algebra to some trite phrases and cliches a new
>>>understanding can be reached
>>>of the secret to wealth and success.
>>>
>>>Here it goes.
>>>
>>> Knowledge is Power
>>> Time is Money and as every engineer knows,
>>> Power is Work over Time.
>>>
>>>So, substituting algebraic equations for these time worn bits of wisdom, we
>>>get:
>>> K = P (1)
>>> T = M (2)
>>> P = W/T (3)
>>>
>>>Now, do a few simple substitutions:
>>>
>>> Put W/T in for P in equation (1), which yields:
>>> K = W/T (4)
>>>
>>>Put M in for T into equation (4), which yields:
>>>
>>> K = W/M (5).
>>>
>>>Now we've got something. Expanding back into English, we get:
>>>
>>> Knowledge equals Work over Money.
>>>
>>>What this MEANS is that:
>>>
>>> 1. The More You Know, the More Work You Do, and
>>> 2. The More You Know, the Less Money You Make.
>>>
>>>Solving for Money, we get:
>>>
>>> M = W/K (6)
>>> Money equals Work Over Knowledge.
>>>
>>>>From equation (6) we see that Money approaches infinity as Knowledge
>>>approaches 0, regardless of the Work done.
>>>
>>>What THIS MEANS is:
>>>
>>> The More you Make, the Less you Know.
>>>
>>>Solving for Work, we get
>>>
>>> W = M K (7)
>>> Work equals Money times Knowledge
>>>
>>>>From equation (7) we see that Work approaches 0 as Knowledge approaches 0.
>>>
>>>What THIS MEANS is:
>>>
>>> The stupid rich do little or no work.
>>>
>>>Working out the socioeconomic implications of this breakthrough is left as an
>>>exercise for the reader.
>>>
