[1656] in Humor
HUMOR: One hell of a headache...
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Andrew Bennett)
Thu Oct 24 15:40:27 1996
Date: Thu, 24 Oct 1996 15:23:28 -0400
To: humor@MIT.EDU
From: abennett@MIT.EDU (Andrew Bennett)
A little risque, but a good one.
-Drew
>Date: Thu, 24 Oct 1996 15:14:27 +0400
>From: jaz@MIT.EDU (Joe Ziehler)
>
>Joe was moderately successful in the career, but as he got older he
>was increasingly hampered by incredible headaches. When his personal
>hygiene and love life started to suffer, he sought medical help.
>After being referred from one specialist to another, he finally
>came across a doctor who solved the problem.
>
>"The good news is I can cure your headaches. . ." >
>"The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a
>very rare condition which causes your testicles to press up against
>the base of your spine. The pressure creates one hell of a
>headache.
>The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles." >
>Joe was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he has anything to
>livefor. He couldn't concentrate long enough to answer, but decided he
>had no choice but to go under the knife. >
>When he left the hospital, his mind was clear, but he felt like he
>was missing an important part of himself. As he walked down the street,
>he realized that he felt like a different person. He could make a new
>beginning and live a new life.
>
>He walked past a men's clothing store and thought, "That's what I
>need:
>a new suit." He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a
>new suit."
>
>The salesman eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see...size 44 long." >
>Joe laughed, "That's right, how did you know?" >
>"It's my job."
>
>Joe tried on the suit. It fit perfectly. As Joe admired himself in
>the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about a new shirt?" >
>Joe thought for a moment and then said, "Sure..." >
>The salesman eyed Joe and said, "Let's see...34 sleeve and... >16 and
>a half neck"
>
>Joe was surprised, "That's right, how did you know?" >
>"It's my job."
>
>Joe tried on the shirt, and it fit perfectly. As Joe adjusted the
>collar in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about new shoes?" >
>Joe was on a roll and said, "Sure . . ." >
>The salesman eyed Joe's feet and said, "Let's see...9 and a
>half...wide."
>
>Joe was astonished, "That's right, how did you know?" >
>"It's my job."
>
>Joe tried on the shoes and they fit perfectly. Joe walked
>comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about a new hat?"
>Without hesitating, Joe said, "Sure ... " >
>The salesman eyed Joe's head and said, "Let's see...7 5/8." >
>joe was incredulous, "That's right, how did you know?" >
>It's my job."
>
>The hat fit perfectly. Joe was feeling great, when the salesman
>asked,
>"How about some new underwear?"
>
>Joe thought for a second and said, "Sure ... " >
>The salesman stepped back, eyed Joe's waist and said, "Let's
>see...size 36."
>
>Joe laughed, "No, I've worn size 34 since I was 18 years old." >
>The salesman shook his head, "You can't wear a size 34. It would
>press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one
>hell of a headache."
>
>
>########################################################
>Joe Ziehler 617-253-6916 (office)
>MIT Sea Grant AUV Laboratory 617-258-5730 (fax)
>292 Main St, Bldg. E38-372 jaz@mit.edu
>Cambridge, MA 02139
>########################################################
>
--
Andrew Bennett ->MIT Department Ocean Engineering<- abennett@mit.edu
MIT Room 5-424 abennett%athena@mitvma.bitnet
77 Massachusetts Ave. Phone: (617) 253-7950
Cambridge, MA 02139 <Standard disclaimers apply>
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