[1607] in Humor
HUMOR: Neuticles
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (abennett@MIT.EDU)
Wed Sep 18 10:27:41 1996
From: <abennett@MIT.EDU>
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Wed, 18 Sep 1996 10:02:19 EDT
Date: Wed, 18 Sep 1996 00:33:19 -0800
From: connie@interserve.com (Connie Kleinjans)
From: Mike Beyries <mbeyries@netmanage.com>
_____________________________ Forward Header __________________________________
I saw this article in the Houston Chronicle 9/14/96. Really.
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>From the Reuters News Service
By Kevin Drawbaugh
Invention Puts Rover's Dignity Back
Implants available for neutered dogs
Chicago - Plastic replacement testicles for neutered dogs are selling
briskly in the United States and Canada, and the manufacturer plans to
market its unusual product - called Neuticles - in Britain.
Since they were launched in March, Neuticles have been implanted in 817
American dogs, said CTI Corp. president and Neuticles inventor Gregg
Miller, of Buckner, MO.
"We're doing six to 10 U.S. implants per day," he said, adding that
sales campaigns in Britain - where pets are revered - and South Africa
are planned.
"People are aghast when they hear about Neuticles to begin with. If
you're not a dog owner, it seems silly," Miller said. But he said
implants may help reduce a growing unwanted pet population by
encouraging squeamish owners to go get their pets neutered.
"Before, you only had one option. ... With these,the dog looks the same.
He feels the same. He doesn't even know he's been neutered," Miller
said.
Jelly-bean shaped Neuticles come in five sizes - suitable for dogs from
Chihuahuas to Great Danes - and range in price from $28 for an
extra-small pair to $32 for large. They are implanted into the scrotum
in a two-minute procedure immediately following removal of the natural
testicles.
"We think it's kind of silly, but if this is going to be something that
encourages owners to have their dogs neutered , then fine," said Martha
Armstrong, spokeswoman for the Humane Society of the United States in
Washington.
Dr. Alan Lipowitz, a Minneapolis-based veterinarian and an officer of
the American College of Veterinary Surgeons, said it was not known
whether dogs suffer psychologically from neutering. "But if it makes
the owner feel better and doesn't do any harm to the dog, then good," he
said.
A former journalist and candy-company owner, Miller got the idea for
Neuticles after his bloodhound Buck lost his doghood. "I felt bad; Buck
felt bad," he said. "It dawned on me that this 200-year-old procedure
needed to be updated."
Miller contacted veterinarian Dr. Richard Holder. "When I first told
him my idea, he said I was crazy," Miller said. But Holder agreed to
develop the implantation procedure and after 3 1/2 years of research,
Neuticles are a reality.
No complications have been reported, and veterinarians around the
country are ordering the product. Implants for cats are under
development, Miller said.
