[1281] in Humor
HUMOR: Splendid Retort
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Andrew A. Bennett)
Thu Jan 25 10:58:56 1996
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Thu, 25 Jan 1996 10:39:53 EST
From: "Andrew A. Bennett" <abennett@MIT.EDU>
Date: Thu, 25 Jan 1996 05:17:17 +0000 (GMT)
From: Espacionaute Spiff domine! <MATOSSIAN@aries.colorado.edu>
Subject: splendid retort
From: slapfel@CCGATE.HAC.COM
Fly the Friendly Skies
An award should go to the United Airlines gate agent in Denver for
being smart and funny, and making her point, when confronted with a
passenger who probably deserved to fly as cargo.
During the final days at Denver's old Stapleton airport, a crowded
United flight was canceled.
A single agent was rebooking a long line of inconvenienced travelers.
Suddenly an angry passenger pushed his way to the desk. He slapped his
ticket down on the counter and said, "I HAVE to be on this flight and
it has to be FIRST CLASS."
The agent replied, "I'm sorry sir. I'll be happy to try to help you,
but I've got to help these folks first, and I'm sure we'll be able to
work something out."
The passenger was unimpressed. He asked loudly, so that the passengers
behind him could hear, "Do you have any idea who I am?"
Without hesitating, the gate agent smiled and grabbed her public
address microphone.
"May I have your attention please?" she began, her voice bellowing
throughout the terminal. "We have a passenger here at the gate WHO
DOES NOT KNOW WHO HE IS. If anyone can help him find his identity,
please come to gate 17."
With the folks behind him in line laughing hysterically, the man glared
at the United agent, gritted his teeth and swore "(Expletive) you."
Without flinching, she smiled and said, "I'm sorry, sir, but you'll
have to stand in line for that, too."
The man retreated as the people in the terminal applauded loudly.
Although the flight was canceled and people were late, they were no
longer angry at United.
