[1167] in Humor
A Funny Letter Home to Parents (fwd)
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Michael Khusid )
Sat Oct 28 15:46:39 1995
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Sat, 28 Oct 95 15:44:05
From: mkhusid@MIT.EDU (Michael Khusid )
------- Forwarded Message
>Posted-Date: Mon, 23 Oct 1995 16:07:02 -0400
>From: "Andrew K. Louw" <alouw@sas.upenn.edu>
>Subject: A Funny Letter Home to Parents (fwd)
>Date: Mon, 23 Oct 1995 16:09:43 -0400
>
>Forwarded message:
> "Dear Mom and Dad:
> Since I left for college I have been remiss in writing and
>I am sorry for my thoughtlessness in not having written before. I will
>bring you up to date now, but before you read on, please sit down. You are
>not to read any further unless you are sitting down. Okay?
> Well then, I am getting along pretty well now. The skull fracture
>and the concussion I got when I jumped out of the window of my dormitory
>when it caught fire shortly after my arrival here is pretty well healed now.
>I only spent two weeks in the hospital and now I can see almost normally
>and only get those sick headaches once a day.
> Fortunately, the fire in the dormitory, and my jump was witnessed
>by an attendant at the gas station near the dorm, and he was the one who
>called the Fire Department and the ambulance. He also visited me in the
>hospital and since I have nowhere to live because of the burned-out
>dormitory, he was kind enough to invite me to share his apartment with him.
>It's really a basement room, but it is kind of cute. He is a very fine boy
>and we have fallen deeply in love and are planning on getting married. We
>haven't got the exact date yet, but it will be before my pregnancy begins to
>show. Yes mother and Dad, I am pregnant. I know how much you are looking
>forward to being grandparents and I know that you will welcome the baby and
>give it the same love and devotion and tender care you gave me when I was a
>child. The reason for the delay in our marriage is that my boyfriend has a
>minor infection which prevents us from passing our pre-marital blood tests
>and I carelessly caught it from him.
> I know that you will welcome him into our family with open arms.
>He is kind, and, although not well educated, he is ambitious. Although he
>is of a different race and religion than ours, I know your often-expressed
>tolerance will not permit you to be bothered by that.
> Now that I have brought you up to date, I want to tell you that
>there was no dormitory fire, I did not have a concussion or skull fracture,
>I was not in the hospital, I am not pregnant, I am not engaged, I am not
>infected and there is no boyfriend in my life. However, I am getting a D in
>History and F in Science and I want you to see those marks in their proper
>perspective.
>
>
>
>Your loving daughter,
>
>Susie
------- End of Forwarded Message
