[91] in Depressing_Thoughts
Re: Meeting people
aaron@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (aaron@ATHENA.MIT.EDU)
Mon Aug 1 18:49:16 1988
with regards to changing this meeting: don't even consider it.
as for the rest,...
Old lovers do make pretty good friends. Current friends may or may not
make good lovers; would you want to be lovers with someone with whom you
weren't friends? On the other hand, you've been friends for a certain
amount of time; what's different? I guess people change, but...
People (women?) in general, seem to be violently turned off by "searching"
Being in the right place is much better, but of course you can't find the
right place by looking. If you go looking for the right place, you will
find that a) you have little success, and b) you are orders of magnitude
more frustrated and depressed. If you aren't looking for the right
place, at least you have an explanation for a lack of success. :-)
Of course, there are those who say that if you want something, you have
to work for it, but it seems unlikely that if you start doing things that
aren't the things you normally find "fun," you are going to find
someone with whom you get along tremendously well.
As near as I can tell, though, it doesn't matter where you are, whom you
know, or what you do, because everyone's already got someone else anyway.
The chances of meeting someone to whom you are attracted is low enough
already; the chances of that person a) being attracted to you, and b)
being between relationships works out to a microscopically small number.
Since you're going to have to wait a long time, you may as well get used
to it. There's a good play about waiting by Samual Beckett...
Remember, the less you think of yourself, the less everyone else will think
of you; the more you think of yourself, the less everyone else thinks they
have to.
