[1470] in Depressing_Thoughts
It's been nice but I have to scream now.
jcb@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (jcb@ATHENA.MIT.EDU)
Sat Sep 15 22:34:07 1990
I feel drained. Last night I helped about ten people, most of whom had
never rappelled before, rappel down East Campus to remove the green
footprints. There's something very draining about being the one who has
to talk everyone over the edge and past the fifth floor ledge.
For one thing, I'm the last safeguard. It's my responsibility to make
sure everyone who goes over the ledge is hooked in safely. There is
literally *no* margin for error--a fall would be disastrous. For
another, if anyone is having trouble, I have to boost their confidence
and calm their nervousness. I can't let any impatience show when
someone is too terrified to move. I also have to watch the rope to make
sure no one steps on it (despite the fact that they have all been told
repeatedly the dangers of doing so). The list goes on.
Despite all that, I enjoyed the session last night. Unfortunately we
didn't finish removing the green footprints and are going to do that
tonight. First of all, I haven't had a chance to recharge. Second of
all, I'm worried that everyone who was there last night will show up
again with friends who also want to try rappelling. I will likely then
be in the uncomfortable position of having to tell some of the people
who really want to rappel that they have to punt and come back some
other time. This could get uncomfortable if some of them argue
(although I will *not* let the numbers grow to the point where safety
gets compromised, no matter what). I *really* want to avoid a situation
where I have to get into a major argument, and then without much chance
to calm down, start the rappelling session without being flustered to
the point where something bad happens. This has the potential to be
less than fun. Sigh.
