[1263] in Depressing_Thoughts
Re: Me and my ex...
raeburn@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (raeburn@ATHENA.MIT.EDU)
Wed Jul 11 09:11:23 1990
> I understand her decision and I respect it. That
>doesn't mean that I have to like it, but I do understand it.
It almost sounds like she made the decision, and informed you of it later;
was that the case or did you really discuss it before reaching this
conclusion?
\footnote{I nearly would omit the "almost" except that one or
two ex-girlfriends of mine have had tendencies to do that sort of thing
(on much more minor issues) so perhaps I've become predisposed towards
seeing things happen that way.}
Were I in your shoes, I would be not at all convinced by that line of
thinking. It sounds like the two of you are both hurting now, and it is
possible, believe it or not, for two people to break up without a great
deal of pain on either side.
>So what do I do with all the anger and agression that has been building
>up! Who do I hit/yell at/flame/bludgeon? What do I do with all this
>negative energy.
Can you put it into yelling at/bludgeoning some inanimate object that
won't care? It's not as effective as doing real damage to something or
someone, but it does help some, and doesn't make you as sorry afterwards.
Or, if you've ever been the brooding sort, just let it stew. Eventually
it'll fade away, or you'll see something from a different viewpoint that
will change how you feel, or maybe you'll find something positive (a new
job or hobby, or some other girl) that might help you forget.
I've tried both of these at times, usually the latter. In time, it fades.
I wish I had better ideas of what to do, that I could give you.
Several times I have wished for better ideas....
