[2437] in Central_America
New quotes for Mon May 14
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Initializer.SysDaemon)
Mon May 14 01:50:56 1990
Date: Mon, 14 May 90 01:50:31 EDT
From: root@charon.MIT.EDU (Initializer.SysDaemon)
To: ca-mtg@bloom-beacon.mit.edu
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celine (Robert Fullmer):
Why not have an old-fashioned Christmas for your family this year? Just
picture the scene in your living room on Christmas morning as your
children open their old-fashioned presents.
Your 11-year-old son: "What the heck is this?"
You: "A spinning top! You spin it around, and then eventually it
falls down. What fun! Ha, ha!"
Son: "Is this a joke? Jason Thompson's parents got him a computer
with two disk drives and 128 kilobytes of random-access memory,
and I get this cretin TOP?"
Your 8-year-old daughter: "You think that's bad? Look at this."
You: "It's figgy pudding! What a treat!"
Daughter: "It looks like goat barf."
-- Dave Barry, "Simple, Homespun Gifts"
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jcbourne (Juliet C Bourne):
I'll never understand him.
He's sweet and intelligent and sensitive...
So why does he refuse to let anyone near him?
------
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can't change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
------
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lwvanels (Lucien W. Van Elsen):
Same things in life are bad
They can really make you mad
Other things just make you swear and curse
When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out
for the best...
And...
(Music slides into the song)
...always look on the bright side of life...
(Whistle)
Always look on the bright side of life..
(Whistle)
If life seems jolly rotten
There's something you've forgotten
And that's to laug and smile and dance and sing
When you're feelingin the dumps
Don't be silly chumps
Just purse your lisps and whistle - that's the thing.
And... always look on the bright side of life...
(Whistle)
come on.
(Others start to join in)
Always look on the bright side of life...
(Whistle)
For life is quite absured
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow
Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin
Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow.
So always look on the bright side of death
Just before you draw your terminal breath
Life's a piece of shit
When you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true.
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morbias (Jason N Paul):
{From system: This user's .plan file is not world readable}
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paul (Paul Boutin):
"MIT people who talk to me about music usually have the same effect as
Berklee people who talk to me about computers."
- Paul Boutin, MIDI curmudgeon
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rongut (Ron A Gut):
A Plan for the Improvement of English Spelling
by Mark Twain
For example, in Year 1 that useless letter "c" would be dropped
to be replased either by "k" or "s", and likewise "x" would no longer
be part of the alphabet. The only kase in which "c" would be retained
would be the "ch" formation, which will be dealt with later. Year 2
might reform "w" spelling, so that "which" and "one" would take the
same konsonant, wile Year 3 might well abolish "y" replasing it with
"i" and Iear 4 might fiks the "g/j" anomali wonse and for all.
Jenerally, then, the improvement would kontinue iear bai iear
with Iear 5 doing awai with useless double konsonants, and Iears 6-12
or so modifaiing vowlz and the rimeining voist and unvoist konsonants.
Bai Iear 15 or sou, it wud fainali bi posibl tu meik ius ov thi
ridandant letez "c", "y" and "x" -- bai now jast a memori in the maindz
ov ould doderez -- tu riplais "ch", "sh", and "th" rispektivli.
Fainali, xen, aafte sam 20 iers ov orxogrefkl riform, wi wud
hev a lojikl, kohirnt speling in ius xrewawt xe Ingliy-spiking werld.
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swmpthng (Tim Stellmach):
When a man's an empty kettle
he should be on his mettle,
and yet I'm torn apart.
Just because I'm presumin' that I could be kinda human
if I only had a heart.
-- "The Wizard of Oz"
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wesommer (Bill Sommerfeld):
"For example, on the DEC VAX, assume that register T is completely
random (but a little less random than on the PDP-10, as it has only 32
random bits)."
Guy L. Steele, Jr.
_Common Lisp: The Language_, section 12.9
--- End of Central America ---
