[20420] in APO-L
Re: [[APO-L] Brotherhood]
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Jesse Bridges)
Tue Apr 6 09:26:25 1999
Date: Tue, 6 Apr 1999 09:26:18 EDT
Reply-To: Jesse Bridges <jaybee3@NETSCAPE.NET>
From: Jesse Bridges <jaybee3@NETSCAPE.NET>
To: APO-L@LISTSERV.IUPUI.EDU
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Date: 6 Apr 99 08:50:19 EDT
From: Jesse Bridges <jaybee3@netscape.net>
To: Mel <meljjone@MARS.UTM.EDU>
Subject: Re: [[APO-L] Brotherhood]
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[Mel]
I pledged Alpha Phi Omega my freshman year. I pledge APO due to its Co-e=
d
nonracial Service oriented status. I could have just as easily joined a
Social Sorority and/or been a little sister to a Social Frat. I firmly
believe that our chapter has a extremely strong brotherhood. We may not
always agree with each other (neither do we always agree on APO-List), bu=
t
we with defend each other to the death. We are a very diverse group.
having about appoximate numbers 53% white, 44% black, 3%Asian, 82%
female, and 18% male and app 35 brothers who are active, associate or
neophytes (in between final vote and innit.)
[Jesse]
Let me ask you this, if those Asians had a concept of what the fraternity=
should be like and it was different that what you'v experienced, would yo=
u be
opened to it. Think about it. You concept of a fraternity is just that,=
a
concept. Now if, Frank Reed Horton had a different concept than the one =
you
hold today, does that make his concept wrong. And if there where some th=
at
wanted model his thoughts and concepts of a fraternity on
to new chapters why would that be a bad thing?
[Mel]
That does not include several alumni who are active in our chapter. Gran=
ted
we may not have that many males in our chapter at this time. It tends to=
fluctuate. We do all types of brotherhood events. For example three fem=
ale
brothers and one male brother when to a dance club one saturday night. To=
tally
platonic brotherly relationships. Had a blast even stayed for the male ho=
t
body contest on the condition that we (meaning the females had to go to t=
he
wet t-shirt contest next time. =
[Jesse]
You see, this make me see a Society calling it'self a Fraternity. You sa=
y,
you do not want to be social, yet your activities that you call brotherly=
activities are more social than service. If you are acting like a Societ=
y
that does service under the cover of the name of a Fraternity then you ha=
ve
lost your uniqueness.
[Mel]
NONE of the brothers in question are gay! We go skating, bowling,to the =
movies (Girlflicks and guy flicks), bars, play darts, Basketbal, and etc.=
(of
couse some of these things are not officially APO Events but they are
brotherly events that we do as brothers and friends. Several of my best
friends are in APO including my best friend. I believe APO should stay
co-ed. =
[Jesse]
I actually see more clearly as to why you would want Alpha Phi Omega to s=
tay
co-ed. =
[Mel]
If a chapter is started on a all female or a all male campus so be
it let it be. If a chapter is all male so be it. I like our toast
song the reference to Men instead of members doesn't bug me after all we
are a fraternity and we are brothers. =
[Jesse]
This is further evidence that if you are with the majority you can do any=
thing
and make it seem real. Let me ask you this. what if some guys (young men=
) in
a college, lets say across the street from the college you where you are
located, wanted to start a chapter but they had no women. And lets just =
say
that you have less men now than you ever did (your chapter). Lets say th=
ey
wanted your help and assistence. Then you would have a chapter, right ac=
ross
street, of men that would be indebted to you for your assistence. Wouldn=
't
that be just as fun. =
[Mel]
I've seen the same argueing and defending occur with all-male chapter as =
in
co-ed chapters. They have a strong brotherhood too.
[Jesse]
I have never seen the how deep the brotherhood is on a campus that has ov=
er a
hundred. But do I remember coming to a large co-ed chapter that just wen=
t
inactive because the male president and the female president left with al=
l the
treasury. I had just became a brother and tranferred =
to that campus. The campus band, over 100, was the only organization on
campus as big as Alpha Phi Omega. Yet, I wore my shirt on campus and onl=
y
ever met one person from that chapter. Not saying this would happen on e=
very
campus. Just saying that I know the brotherhood maybe strong, but it is
definitely different. And just because it is different, it doesn't make =
it
bad. It is essential for men to come together and learn from each other.=
=
This is something you will find in every church. =
=
[Mel]
Each chapter has their own ups and downs but it is our brotherhood that
keeps us together and alive. I love each and everyone of my brothers. I
may not always like them! but they are my brothers and I will help them t=
o
the end.
In question to Brother dating brother, It happens so what.
[Jesse]
This seems to be a goal by some and the only motivating factor of =
pledging by others. Not all of course. I believe that being of service
should be the motivating factor. And some social fraternity and sororiti=
es do
the same if not more service than does Alpha Phi Omega. If you campus is=
one
of them, then I see a Society when I look at your chapter and the activit=
ies
you mentioned. =
[Mel]
It happens with little sisters and frats and visa versa. I have seen on
several levels. Male-male , Female-female, male-female. It happens. I
personally have dated a male brother from another chapter. Would I do it
again? =
[Jesse]
Yes you will. Some people feel more comfortable joining a society instea=
d a
fraternity for the same reasons. And this has became a way of life for y=
ou
and others within Alpha Phi Omega. But why halt other ways of life.
Alpha Phi Omega has helped me learn manhood, leadership, friendship and
service. And I thank god for that opportunity. But now in order to shar=
e
what being in Alpha Phi Omega taught me, the way it was taught, I have to=
travel several miles to the nearest all-male chapter. My problem why des=
troy
my history and replace it with yours. I didn't live my life like that, n=
or do
I care to. Only because I've experienced Alpha Phi Omega and treasure my=
experiences as do you to your experiences.
If somebody didn't want me but ask be to be aprt of them because they nee=
d me
to be a chapter. Is that bad. I know of a coed chapter that none of the=
men
wants the females in the chapter but they have no other choice. Don't yo=
u
just hate it when choices are being taken away. And if you take this cho=
ice
away aren't more likely to become 80% female. Then where would the fun b=
e? =
[Mel]
Time will tell. Relationships between pledge and active can be
tricky. One must make sure one is not hazing or being prejudice.
[Jesse]
Dang, Brother-to-brother dating procedures. I guess we must set a dating=
resolution for our next bylaws.
Remember, these are the views of one man.
JayBEE!
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