[1007] in Daily_Rumour
The Louisiana Picayune
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Sandhya Deo)
Sat Oct 14 17:24:40 1995
To: rumor@MIT.EDU
Date: Sat, 14 Oct 1995 17:24:05 EDT
From: Sandhya Deo <sdeo@MIT.EDU>
Sorry about the delay, this should have come out earlier this afternoon.
The Louisiana Picayune
Saturday, March 3, 1928
Mick Dulac, Editor in Chief
---------------------------------------------------------------------
DOCKS DAMAGED IN EXPLOSION
Late Friday night, a ship approached the docks of New Orleans
and, shortly after raising a Mexican flag, exploded. Approximately
25% of the docks [the third floor] were caught in the blast and
subsequently reduced to rubble. One onlooker described the scene as
"destruction, destruction, destruction."
---------------------------------------------------------------------
FATHER ESSEX ASSAULTED AT BOXING MATCH
At the Professional Boxing Match this evening, Father Peter
Essex was apparently shot once by an unknown assailant. He told
authorities that as he stood outside the arena, a single gunman,
described as "a tall man, dressed in black," appeared around a far
corner and fired at him, hitting him in the arm. He drew a weapon,
returning fire, as the assailant fled down the hallway. Within
seconds, the Sherriff was on the scene, investigating the assault.
However, many suspect that the Father may have simply shot
himself in an outlandish attempt to draw attention from the event.
The already boxing match, already made controversial by numerous
accusations of cheating, was further marred by the distraction caused
by the assault.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
CARDENZA HANGS SELF IN PRISON
Juan Cardenza, a dock worker, horse trainer, and animal
handler who was being held in the New Orleans jail, was found dead
today by stunned police officers. Mr. Cardenza was being held on two
counts of murder in the first degree, and apparently chose to hang
himself rather than face trial. Police are baffled as to how he was
able to commit suicide in this fashion while under close guard, and
Sheriff Dulac was quoted as saying, "I wouldn't have believed it
possible."
---------------------------------------------------------------------
MAYOR ENDORSES CANDIDATE IN SENATORIAL ELECTION
Mayor Francesca Santiago has decided to come out in support of
Sheriff Reginald Dulac in the Senatorial race. While the choice for
support between Mr. Dulac and Mr. Xarm was close, the Santiagos felt
that Mr. Dulac had provided more to the State of Louisiana and New
Orleans during the recent days of difficulty. The Santiago family was
quick to support the announcement.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
ART GALLERY RECEIVES DONATIONS
The Santiago Art Gallery has made the following press release:
The Santiago Art Gallery would like to thank Reginald Dulac
for his MORE than generous donation to its collections, and, as
Mr. Dulac has been a regular supporter of the arts, Ithe Gallery and
the Art Society would like to announce its endorsement of
Mr. Dulac. Any man who supports the arts as fully as Mr. Dulac is
certaily someone we want as Senator
---------------------------------------------------------------------
SPORTS SECTION
Thursday's Amateur Boxing Match took place as scheduled, and
the two winners were Chris Flemming and Fergie MacGregor.
Mr. Flemming won the Friday showdown, claiming the $1500 prize.
Friday's Professional Boxing Match was riddled with
accusations of cheating, culminating in Leonard Abercrombie's assault
of the referee upon being thrown out of the match for numerous
infractions of rules. The $5000 pot was ultimately awarded to Rubio
Sanchez.
In horse racing, Havana Gold, Mr. Julio Santiago's horse, died
of a heart attack Friday. Foul play is suspected, as there was
already some worry over the horse when it uncharacteristically
rejected its feed bag Thursday. Said owner Santiago, "I think that
the races should be called off while the police investigate..." The
races are currently scheduled to be at 4pm Saturday. [in Killian
Court]
---------------------------------------------------------------------
DULAC TAKES LAST MINUTE STAND
Due to the timely nature of the information, this paper is
printing the following letter from Jefferson Parish Sheriff Reginald
Dulac as received this evening.
***
Greetings, men and women of the great state of Louisiana!
As many of you know, it is currently my honor to submit myself as a
candidate for the position of Senator from this great state. I have
spoken with many of you about this personally, but it has come to my
attention that not enough people are aware of my stands on the various
issues of the day.
In my defense, let me say that I have been making a great effort to
get out and speak with the people; to be more to my fellow citizens
than simply a shopping list of issues with the appropriate `FOR' or
`AGAINST' checkbox marked off at the end. I continue to strive to be
the candidate that the people will elect because I am best able to
represent their beliefs and concerns at Washington. I believe that my
many years experience as a law enforcement officer, as a businessman
and agriculturalist, and as a member of the New Orleans community make
me the candidate best qualified to represent the people of Louisiana.
That said, allow me to share with you how I feel about some of the
important issues of today:
I oppose the repeal of prohibition. Now, some people might feel it
somewhat strange that I would support prohibition, since the claim has
been made that prohibition is ineffective, but as a longstanding
member of the law enforcement community, I can tell you that
prohibition definitely has its place in the country. The prohibition
laws defend the people by providing law enforcement with a tool to
discourage and prevent dangerous and extreme abuses.
I am against raising taxes on industry and agriculture, but at the
same time I do admit that sometimes taxes are the best way to
accomplish certain goals for the betterment of all. For example,
while I oppose the imposition of new taxes on industry and
agriculture, I am one of the principal supporters of the upcoming
referenda to raise money to replace the existing docks, dock
equipment, and storage facilities currently used. The existing
equipment will have to be replaced at some point and currently proves
to be too much of a risk to public health and safety to be allowed to
continue.
My family has owned a plantation in New Orleans since the territory
was first purchased by the United States of America; the Dulac clan
has been influential in shaping this entire part of the country.
After my many years of service to the people of Louisiana, it should
come as no surprise that I have a great love for our country. This is
why I must say that I oppose the imposition of the so-called `Jim
Crow' discrimination laws, while at the same time being strongly in
favor of independence for the territories of Puerto Rico, Guam, and
the Phillipines, and for joining the League of Nations. Whatever else
they might do, the `Jim Crow' laws fly in the face of the idea that
this is `..one nation, under God, with liberty and justice for all'.
Similarly, as I have said numerous times in person, this practice of
imperialism apparent in keeping territories around is simply
unacceptable. If these territories wish to become part of the United
States, then they should apply for statehood; otherwise, they should
stand on their own feet.
On the delicate nature of foreign relations, I can tell you that I
feel strongly that the current raids on ships in the Gulf of Mexico
must be stopped, especially in light of recent events, but it also
seems clear that there is a great potential for danger in responding
with force before we are completely sure who exactly is responsible.
I've been a policeman for years, and this smells of a set-up. If
elected, I will do my best to make sure that this great country of
ours is not manipulated into acting outside its interests. of ours is
not manipulated into acting outside its interests, while at the same
time making certain that our borders and shipping routes are safe and
secure.
Reginald Dulac
***
------- End of Forwarded Message
