[902] in Humor
HUMOR: Signs of the Times
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Andrew A. Bennett)
Fri Jun 2 10:35:18 1995
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Fri, 02 Jun 1995 10:27:19 EDT
From: "Andrew A. Bennett" <abennett@MIT.EDU>
Date: Thu, 1 Jun 95 18:06:40 PDT
From: Connie_Kleinjans@Novell.COM (Connie Kleinjans)
From: rossix!rwc.dnet!apdma@openlink.openlink.com (Mary Ann Anthony)
From: ROSSIX::"fwb@scruz.net"
Store Signs in the USA
In a New York Restaurant --- Customers who find our waitresses rude
ought to see the manager.
In LA dance hall --- good clean dancing every night but Sunday.
In Florida maternity ward --- No children allowed.
In the offices of a loan company --- Ask about our plans for owing your
home.
In a toy department --- Five Santa Clauses, no waiting.
In a Maine shop --- our motto is to give our customers the lowest
possible prices and workmanship.
On military bases --- restricted to unauthorized personal.
On a display of `You are my one and only' valentine cards ---now
available in multi-pack.
In downtown Boston --- Callahan tunnel / No end.
In a window of a general store --- Why go elsewhere and be cheated
when you can come right here?
In a Maine restaurant --- Open 7 days a week and weekends.
In a New Jersey Restaurant --- Open 11 AM to 11 PM Midnight.
In a Pennsylvania cemetery --- Persons are prohibited from picking
flowers from any but their own graves...
On the grounds of a private school --- No tresspassing without
permission.
In a library --- Blotter paper will no longer be available until the
public stops taking it away.
On a Tennessee Highway --- Take notice, when this sign is under water,
this road is impassable.
On a movie marquee --- Now playing ADAM AND EVE with a cast of
thousands...
Fred Barling
fwb@scruznet.com
