[88] in Humor
HUMOR: More MIT Definitions
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (abennett@MIT.EDU)
Fri Feb 18 16:08:13 1994
From: abennett@MIT.EDU
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Fri, 18 Feb 94 16:01:08 EST
Date: Fri, 18 Feb 94 13:00:32 EST
From: Ivan Gevirtz <gevirtzi@MIT.EDU>
here is a whole lexicon my class did for 21W730 (expository writing).
some of this is pretty funny!
enjoy :) Ivan
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.001 (abbrev.): 6.001, the introductory class for Course 6; designed to turn
people away from course 6; a weeder class
10-250 (prop. noun): a large, purple lecture hall, designed by some MITsage
who thought purple keeps students' attention, and thus students would
not fall asleep; of course, this same sage must have been the one who decided
to install plush, cushioned seats. 10-250 is notorious for allowing freshmen
an additional 45 minutes of peaceful sleep.
2.70 (prop. noun): a design contest class. This nationally-televised contest
is MIT's biggest spectator event. MIT mechanical engineers build small
robots which either capture a desired target or prevent their opponent
from doing the same. Targets are often ping-pong balls.
24-7 (adverb): perpetually; for a long time -- 24-7 originates from 24
hours a day, 7 days a week, the hours some convenience stores are open. A
common myth is that MIT students are awake 24-7. Outsiders feel justified
in thinking this because MIT students are often awake pulling all-nighters
studying or just hanging out. However, this notion is only a myth perpetrated
by those who have never visited 10-250 during a major lecture.
--"I stayed up 24-7 studying for my .001 midterm after watching 2.70 in 10-250.
"
across (noun): 1. formally, the opposite side of the Charles River from
Cambridge 2. used by groups living in Boston to refer to anything of
academic orientation 3. from MIT, a place off-campus that is far away;
usually signifies a good time -- This term originated in 1922 when the MIT
campus moved from Boston across the Charles River to the Cambridge side.
-- See also the other side.
Athena (prop. noun): computer network which holds all the important
information at MIT, available to all of the MIT community; fine in principle,
in reality there are some times when you are lucky to even see a free
computer, much less be fast enough to beat the rest of the crowd racing to
logon. Clusters are open 24 hours a day and are used all 24.
athletics card (noun): what used to be a separate card, now a sticker affixed
to student ID; entitles the bearer to use any of the athletic facilities
on campus; 1993 cost: $20
A.R.A (acronym): food distribution company that provides campus dining
facilities with substandard products (especially the pickles) at inflated
prices
bible (noun): favored study aid containing notes, homework, and tests of
classes taken by friends in prior terms; use once frowned upon but now
acknowledged and sometimes encouraged by professors; new versions appear
every term
Black Bemis (prop. noun): 1. a black light hall on the fifth floor of
East Campus known for the many mind-altering experiences which occur behind
its closed doors 2. The hacker floor
Brass Rat (noun): gold class ring purchased by many during their sophomore
year; so called because the school's beaver mascot on the ring looks
like a rat
Chorallaries (proper noun): largest campus a capella singing group; humorous,
low prestige, well liked; annual "Bad Taste" concert very popular
Clueless (adj.): 1. without a clue 2. a term for being lost as opposed to
being stupid--happens to the brightest
Coop (proper noun): hub of all MIT-related purchases; known for its exorbitant
prices and poor service
Course (preposition): department major; all numbered to limit already low
use of actual words spoken among students; proves convenient, but seems
very techy to the outsider. For example : "I am going course 2 with a
minor in 11 and a concentration in course 14," meaning: Mechanical
Engineering major, with a minor in Urban Studies, and a humanities concentration
in Economics
Course 6 (prop. noun): 1. Electrical Engineering and Computer Science. Course
6 is the most popular major at MIT, and as a result, too many students chose
this major.
Crush (verb): 1. to squeeze or force by pressure so as to alter or destroy
a structure. 2. at MIT used to describe how badly one did in an exam.
For example: "I got crushed in the exam." The 'structure' part of the definition
above refers to the brain. Getting crushed in an exam is the feeling
you get after having studied endless hours for an exam, taking it and not
having the slightest clue of how to answered this question.
-- See hosed.
Daily Confusion (prop. noun): 1-4 page report of all the events that occur
during Rush; for freshmen interested in living at a fraternity or wanting
to get to know what the dorms are like, the Daily Confusion is as necessary
to carry around as the map of the school. Otherwise, the Daily Confusion
becomes a set of invitations to free feasts of lobster and steak. No fre
shmen pay for food during Rush. Besides free food it also lists trips like
baseball games and a boatride to George's Island which frats take possible
pledges on. To take full advantage of Rush, get a copy of these daily agendas;
you'll be well on your way to living the life for a couple of fast-paced days.
D'oh! (exclamation): phrase often said after having done something inane;
originated from the animated TV show called "The Simpsons"; MIT students
exclaim, "D'oh!" when they just remember that they had to pass in a problem
set that was due a half hour ago. To realize the answer to that forty po
int problem on the physics test right after handing it in to the teacher's
assistant also induces its share of D'oh!'s. It's said often because of its
concise way of expressing one's inner pain. D'oh!'s other appealing aspect
is its potential for bringing about a couple of laughs. So next time you
want everyone to know what you're feeling and don't mind them laughing
at you, then yell out, "D'oh!"
EAPS (acronym): stands for Earth, Atmospheric, and Planetary Sciences;
originated out of everyone's dislike for saying the entire name; one of the
well-known fields a student can go into at MIT; its special meaning to
students comes from where its classes are located. EAPS majors take their
classes at the Green Building, the tallest building on campus. While most
students know what this major is all about (due to asking about what goes
on in that tall building), it is not a very highly-enrolled major.
Elsewhere (noun) : best known as the place where Rush isn't; a room located
on the fifth floor of the Student Center where freshmen can get away from
all the hectic events during Rush, relax, play board games or simply meet
other confused freshmen with whom they can talk.
English (prop. noun): language not spoken by teaching assistants at MIT;
at MIT English is not necessarily American. It's ingleis, anglais, ingleich,
or 18.02.964.32. Every semester students ask each other the eternal question,
"Does your TA speak english?" Some say TA is a language all its own.
Fish Bowl (prop. noun): nickname for Athena cluster located in building
eleven right off the infinite corridor coming out of lobby seven; so called
because the walls surrounding the room are glass panes. A person walking
down the corridor can look in and see everyone typing at the computers
inside. Due to its convenient location on the infinite corridor most students
go there to look for an available Athena workstation.
Food Trucks (noun): canteen trucks that station themselves outside building
48; always a welcome alternative to a hungry student with little cash.
Most of the food sold is Chinese and Greek (gyros). However, sometimes
pizza and cold sandwiches are available for a few dollars.
Fred (prop. noun): pseudonym for the East Campus dormitory. Nobody is
exactly sure how this name came about.
G.A.M.I.T. (acronym): MIT acronym for either 1) Gays at MIT or 2) How to
Get Around MIT. Gays at MIT is a coalition of gay and lesbian groups which
hold fund raisers as well as their own parties. How to Get Around MIT is
an informative manual of MIT and its surroundings given to all students
upon entering MIT. It is important to know how to use this acronym
appropriately to avoid confusion.
Green Building (prop. noun): tallest building at MIT on top of which is
located a large spherical object; home to the academic department EAPS or
Earth, Atmospheric and Planetary Sciences; known by MIT students as
building 54; contains a lecture hall called 54-100, or very rarely called,
McDermott Hall; due to many windows, building has become susceptible to hacks
making shapes and words using patterns of on and off lights that can be seen
through the windows from far away. For example: "I have my 12.400 (The
Solar System) class in the Green Building right now," or "It says Sox (RedSox)
in the Green Building."
hack (noun): prank executed by MIT students; major hacks include
installing a ringing telephone booth on the top of the Massachusetts Avenue dome
,
transforming the dome into "The Great Pumpkin," and putting a plastic cow
on top of the dome. Other well-known hacks include those performed at
Harvard-Yale football games.
HASS-D (acronym): humanities and social science distribution course;
every MIT student is required to take three of these courses each from a
different category. There is a wide range of topics covered by these courses
including history, literature, foreign language, social science and art.
Distribution distinguishes a HASS-D from other HASS classes in that HASS-D's
usually have a minimum writing requirement of twenty-five pages as wellas a
final exam; term used officially by institute on grade reports and in
course selection guides, as well as by students. For example: "This
class satisfies a HASS-D for category 3" or: "I need one more HASS-D to
graduate."
Head nod (noun): slow movement of the chin falling to the chest as the
eyes are closing, followed by the sudden snap back of the head to avoid
falling forward; common motion made by MIT students during class as a result of
a lack of sleep the night before.
Hell (prop. noun): A synonym for MIT; used to describe the extraordinary
amount of work and the difficulty of the exams at MIT; lends itself well to
T-shirt slogans such as: "MIT in winter... When hell freezes over."
-- See also I.H.T.F.P.
hosed (adj.): 1.to be in severe trouble as a direct cosequence of "punting"
your work the days before. For example, if the night before a ten page
research paper is due, you find that you have not even started to find
research materials, you may justifiably scream in anguish, "I am hosed!"
2. to feel that you have been unfairly treated by the system. For example,
if you were to fail a test that you had studied hard for, you could say,"I
got hosed on this test." Comes from the phrase, "Getting an education at
MIT is like taking a drink from a fire hose."
I.A.P. (acronym): Stands for Independent Activities Period. IAP is a three
week mini-term that occurs every January. MIT students can choose to
participate in one of the numerous activities and classes offered during
IAP,or they can use this period as vacation time to recover from the exhausting
term before.
intuitively obvious (adj.): Phrase used by many MIT professors, TA's and
textbooks when explaining a concept or problem which is not clear to many
students; term is commonly used for the purpose of saving the user a great
deal of work and explaining; for example, after making a statement that
would be very complicated to prove, a professor will often say, "The proof
of this is intuitively obvious, so I will not waste time by going over it,"
and the student is left bewildered.
I.H.T.F.P. (acronym): Has several meanings including the following: I
Have Truly Found Paradise; I Hate This F---ing Place; It's Hard to Fondle
Penguins; I Help Tutor Freshman Physics; and I Have To Forever Pay; other
interpretations may be found in G.A.M.I.T.; usually used in the same context
as Hell.
Lobdell (prop. noun): 1) The most commonly used cafeteria on the MIT campus.
Located on the second floor of the Student Center building.
L.S.C. - (acronym): 1) Lecture Series Committee. 2) An on-campus group
that sponsors movies on the weekends that can be watched for $2.00 in the
lecture halls.
M.O.Y.A. (acronym): 1)Move Off Your Ass-umptions. 2) A program instituted
for incoming Freshman in order to loosen the atmosphere for them and teach
them to break the ice with other people. 3) A really big waste of time
for any Freshman right before R/O week begins.
nerd (verb): to do homework more than 24 hours before it is due; to study
for an exam more than 24 hours away; (loosely) what an MIT student does
the night before a problem set is due (unless, of course, (s)he punts.); to
tool
Networks (prop. noun): restaurant on the first floor of Stratton Student
Center; go there if one or more of the following apply: (1) You want pizza.
(2) You want refrigerated salad. (3) You have enough time to wait for your
order to be prepared and announced. The wait will generally not exceed one
hour. (If point three applies, you don't belong here.)
nerdkit (noun): briefcase-like container holding chips (not potato), bread
boards and other electronic components for some Course 6 classes e.g. 6.115,
6.004, 6.111
Nightline (prop. Noun): 1. A telephone service sponsored by MIT in which
just about any questions you have can and will be answered for you from
7:00pm - 7:00am, 253-8800.
Orange Tour (prop. noun): an underground tour of MIT given by students of
the East Campus dormitory; conducted during Rush week, and generally
people who don't participate in rush; notorious for showing incoming freshmen
how to get on to the Great Dome, and for introducing them to the concept of
hacking.
other side (noun): (see also across) The Harvard Bridge spans the Charles
river. It separates the MIT campus from Boston. The other side refers
to the other side of the bridge. If you are in Boston, it refers to Cambridge,
and vice versa. However, the general connotation is that when in Cambridge
it refers to Boston-based MIT fraternities. And if in Boston, "the
other side" is spoken with a nasty tone and a sneer on the face, because
it means returning to campus.
OLC (acronym): Also referred to as Athena Gods, OLC is an unknown demon
who is capable of helping clueless people recover from a crashed computer
at 4am. The OLC is staffed by MIT students, and is an abbreviation for On
Line Consulting. OLC is staffed 24-7.
punt (verb): to blow something off. To punt a problem set is to not do
it at all.
problem set (noun): homework. Usually problem sets are given out once a
week.
QMart (prop. noun): aka "the Q"; a 24-7 convenience store located in Boston,
at the foot of the Harvard Bridge. Located between MIT and any Boston
living group, this fraternity haven stocks everything one would need for
the late night tool.
random (adj. or noun): bizarre, unusual, not probable, inconsequential.
Random is a frequently used term that has many different meanings. Random
is often spoken by MIT students in a self-mocking tone. A Random usually
refers to an unknown person, typically at a party, who may be drunk and
acting stupid. Such a random person often does random things at random
times.
Random, J. Arthur (prop. noun): a fictional resident of Random Hall, the
smallest M.I.T. dormitory. All mail associated with Random Hall, but not
with any specific person, is addressed to this character who has come
dangerously close to legal existence and may have been employed by M.I.T..
Over the years Mr(s). Random's first name has been forgotten, inducing some
to question his gender.
recitation (noun): a type of class, usually a small breakdown from a larger
lecture. While lectures take place in 10-250, recitations are usually in
small classrooms, and are taught by TA.'s. Recitations are where students
ask the T.A.'s about problem sets.
scope (verb): 1. to observe another human being with romantic, sexual
intent 2. to blindly copy a problem set. For example: I was scoping out
the hot studs sun-tanning in Killian Court while my friend was scoping
three problem sets.
shower (verb): to physically force a fully-clothed person into a shower
stall while the water is running -- This term originates from the MIT
tradition of throwing freshmen into shower stalls on the night before their
first 8.01 exam. For example: Shower wars between pledge classes are very
common in fraternities.
S. I. P. B. (noun): an acronym for Student Information Processing Board;
volunteers who supposedly help students with their problems on Athena, but
instead, usually end up playing computer games and loud music at odd hours.
for example: I always thought that S. I. P. B. was a group called Students
Interested in Playing Bingo, but I just found out yesterday that they are
actually computer nerds.
Smoot (noun): a unit length used to measure the Harvard Bridge -- This
term originates from a man named Smoot, a former member of Lambda Chi Alpha
Fraternity at MIT, whose body was used as a measuring tool for the Harvard
Bridge. For example: The "69," Smoot mark is my favorite because the
number is perfectly divisible by three. I love math!
S.P.A.M.I.T. (noun): an acronym for Stupid People At MIT; a dying breed of
MIT students who insist that they are stupid and go around selling an
unfashionable t-shirt. For example: I saw a person wearing a S.P.A.M.I.T.
t-shirt dancing foolishly in the center of Killian Court.
Study Break (noun): a period of time when a student neglects his/her studies
to eat, watch television, hang out, or waste time. For example: When
is the next study break? I want some free food!
tool (verb): to study. For example: I have to tool for this exam, because
if I do not, I know I will fail.
'tute (noun): an abbreviation for Massachusetts Institute of Technology.
For example: The 'tute seemed so quiet and empty during the Thanksgiving
weekend.
U.M.O.C. (noun): an acronym for Ugliest Man (Manifestation) On Campus; an
annual competition where students compete to be the most gruesome,
disgusting person on campus. For example: I could probably win the U.M.O.C.
contest if I took a picture of myself in the morning.
Verde's (prop. noun): Abbreviation for the name La Verde's which
translates into "The Greens." This translation seems a little out of
place for a convenience store located on the first floor of the Straton
Student Center. It carries a variety of foods, hygiene items, and paper
products. Its main attribute is its convenience as it remains open on
weeknights until 11 PM. The drawback is its inflated prices; however,
the trade off seems reasonable. One might say: "I'm going to Verde's to
pick up a sub. Meet me at Athena..."
work week (noun): Annual event at most MIT fraternities during the third
week of August. It has been going on at MIT for the past 100 years ever
since fraternities have been part of the student life. It may been called
something else in the early 1900's, but its purpose was identical to today's:
disillusioning freshmen. Usually fraternities spend this week preparing their
house for RUSH. Common projects include painting, finishing floors, plumbing,
and comprehensive cleaning.
xdork (noun): Someone whose life evolves around athena. Xdork comes from
combining the "x" from xwindows, xmh, etc... with the word dork (no
definition necessary). For an xdork, his time is not spent on doing coursework,
but rather exploring the other areas of athena (games, graphics). It is
not uncommon to find an xdork just staring mindlessly into a blank screen
with a big smile on his face. Xdorks breathe and live athena. They
sacrifice class, meals, and even sleep just to spend those extra minutes with
athena. Come graduation time, xdorks cry hysterically because it is time
for them to part with their precious athena accounts. In essence, without
athena, their life is completely meaningless.
xterm (noun): the first of many xwords encountered on X Windows, a user
friendly computer environment developed at M.I.T. for athena. One way to
open xclock, xnewsreader, and xmailhandler is to type simple commands into
xterm, although these applications are also accessible by mouse click at
athena workstations. According to S.I.P.B., " the primary use of xterm is to
provide terminal emulation for those programs that can't use X Windows
directly."
Y (acronym): used to represent "why." It is not really an MIT term, but
just something the 21W730 class created for their lexicon. Y is something
every student at MIT frequently asks himself. Y do we stay up so late
studying and still feel like we're not ready for the test? Y do 15 unit lab
classes end up taking 40 hours per week? Y are we here when we could be at
an easier school like Harvard? Y don't we have a real word for the letter
"Y"? Why ask Y?
zwrite (verb): to send a boxed message to the upper left corner of someone's
athena monitor. The message, a zephyrgram, is blown from one workstation
to another by the god of the west wind and disappears with a mouse click
at the remote terminal. For most people, zwriting is a casual form of
communication used to break the boredom of tooling for 6.001 or 1.00.
"Zwrite me when you feel like eating," one might say. Xdorks write programs
to overload other workstations by sending them more zephyrgrams than they
can handle.
