[689] in Humor
HUMOR: Nerd Test
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Andrew A. Bennett)
Tue Jan 24 22:53:21 1995
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Tue, 24 Jan 1995 22:49:50 EST
From: "Andrew A. Bennett" <abennett@MIT.EDU>
Date: Tue, 24 Jan 1995 16:30:13 EST
From: Oleg E Drozhinin <olegman@MIT.EDU>
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
>
> The Nerdity Test (version 2.1: March 12th, 1992)
>
> INTRODUCTION: All persons are assumed to be initially 0% nerd up until
the
> time that the Nerdity Test is taken. If someone is asked to take the
Nerdity
> Test and refuses for any reason (especially if trying to preserve their 0%
> nerd status) that person's score should then be altered to 100% (you'd have
> to be really nerdy to be that anti-social.)
> For each question on the exam that you answer yes to, add 0.5% (200
> questions total). We recommend that you merely make dashes on a piece
> of paper for each question you answer affirmatively too. Count these hash
> marks and divide by two. This is your percent nerdity.
> Some questions have examples listed after them in parenthesis.
These
> are to be taken as examples and not an all inclusive list.
> **ALL** technicalities count.
> Also, since nerdity is NOT a permanent condition, some of the
questions
> reflect this. Anything labelled "are you currently.." "do you know.." as
> opposed to "have you ever.." etc. should be taken in the context of when
> the test is actually being given. Thus, if you know something nerdy now,
and
> forget it by the time you take this test again, your nerdity score will go
> down.
> For maximum enjoyment, it is also reccomended that each person
> participating respond out loud. Anyone else taking the test with you is
> permitted to ask for details concerning your answer, but please treat such
> information confidentially, as nerdity is not something that people want
> others to know about.
> Please use only a number two pencil. Mark all answers in your blue
> book. Show all work. A table of useful formulas is included at the end.
> You may begin ... NOW!
>
> SECTION 1: education and knowledge
>
> 1. Have you ever taken a "higher" math course? (Trig, Calculus)
> 2. at the college level?
> 3. and received an A (3.7 grade point)?
> 4. Have you ever taken a science course? (Biology, Physics,
Chemistry)
> 5. at the college level?
> 6. and received an A (3.7 grade point)?
> 7. Are you still capable of doing things you learned in the "higher"
> math course?
> 8. Do you still know information you learned in the science course?
> 9. Have you ever majored in the "hard sciences"? (engineering, physics
> chemistry, etc. but excluding psychology, economics, etc.)
> 10. Have you ever taken Latin?
> 11. Have you ever asked a question in lecture?
> 12. Have you ever answered a question asked in lecture?
> 13. Have you ever corrected a professor in lecture?
> 14. Have you ever answered a rhetorical question?
> 15. Do you sit in the front row more than 20% of the time?
> 16. Have you ever had a "perfect attendence record"?
> 17. Do you take notes in more than one color?
> 18. Have you ever tutored someone else?
> 19. Have you ever done homework on a Friday night?
> 20. Have you ever pulled an all-nighter?
> DO YOU KNOW...
> 21. ...BASIC?
> 22. ...PASCAL?
> 23. ...FORTRAN?
> 24. ...assembly language?
> 25. Can you count in binary? (up to decimal 10)
> 26. Can you count in hexadecimal? (up to decimal 20)
> 27. Do you know Maxwell's equations? (integral or differential form)
> 28. Do you know Schroedinger's Equation?
> 29. Have you ever solved Schroedinger's Equation?
> 30. Do you know the right-hand-rule for cross-products?
> 31. Do you know the Latin name (genus and species) for anything?
> (humans, fruitfly, etc.)
> The next few questions deal with physical constants. Mark yes for
> any that you can give the value (2 or more significant digits) for.
> Knowledge of the units attached is NOT necessary, just the numeric
> portion.
> 32. gravitational constant? (G)
> 33. earth's gravity? (g)
> 34. mass of an electron?
> 35. charge of an electron?
> 36. speed of light?
> 37. planck's constant? (h or h-bar)
> 38. permitivity of free space? (epsilon naught)
> 39. permeability of free space? (mu naught)
> 40. Avogadro's number?
> 41. molar gas constant?
> 42. pi? (exception: more than 5 digits for a true answer)
> 43. e? (exception: more than 5 digits for a true answer)
> Can you give the conversion factor between... (2 or more sig.
digits)
> 44. ...centimeters and inches?
> 45. ...kilometers and miles?
> 46. ...joules and electron-volts?
> 47. ...atomic mass units and kilograms?
> 48. ...celsius and kelvin?
> 49. ...celsius and fahrenheit?
> 50. Can you briefly outline the biological processes that occur
> due to alcohol?
> 51. while drunk?
> 52. Have you ever interpolated?
> 53. Have you ever extrapolated?
> 54. Do you know the difference between interpolation and extrapolation?
> 55. Have you ever used the word "asymptotic"?
> 56. Have you ever referred to something as an L.E.D.?
> 57. Have you ever referred to a ruler as a "straight-edge"?
> 58. Have you ever said "quartz crystal"?
> Which of the following acronyms do you know the meaning of...
> 59. ...RADAR?
> 60. ...MODEM?
> 61. ...DNA?
> 62. ...ATP?
> 63. ...NADP?
> 64. ...CRT?
> 65. ...CRC?
> 66. ...NORAD?
> 67. ...NASA?
> 68. ...LED? (see question 56)
> 69. Have you ever created an acronym in order to simplify your writing?
>
> SECTION 2: lifestyle and possessions
>
> 70. Have you ever used a computer?
> 71. for more than 4 hours continuously?
> 72. for more than 8 hours continuously?
> 73. past 4 a.m.?
> 74. on Friday, Saturday and Sunday of the same weekend?
> 75. with someone you were physically attracted toward?
> 76. for money?
> 77. as a source of entertainment? (computer game)
> 78. in the last three months?
> 79. in the last three weeks?
> 80. Have you ever programmed a computer?
> 81. to write a computer game?
> 82. to write a computer virus?
> 83. Do you still own any computer with less than 512k or RAM?
> 84. Have you ever used a modem?
> 85. to gain access to a system you had no authorization on?
> 86. to call a government computer? (NASA, FBI, NORAD)
> 87. Do you watch more than 4 hours of TV on any given day in the last
week?
> 88. Can you name more than 5 shows on PBS? (inc.:A&E, Discovery
Channel)
> 89. Have you ever watched a PBS documentary?
> 90. in the last three weeks?
> 91. Have you ever watched Dr. Who?
> 92. Can you name or discuss the plots of more than 10 Star Trek
episodes?
> Can you whistle, hum, sing or snap the theme songs to...
> 93. ...Gilligan's Island?
> 94. ...Flintstones?
> 95. ...The Brady Bunch?
> 96. ...The Jetson's?
> 97. ...The Addam's Family?
> 98. ...Dobbie Gillis?
> 99. ...I Dream of Genie?
> 100. Do you know most of the words to "The Lumberjack Song" by Monty
Python?
> 101. Have you ever played a non-sexual role-playing game? (D&D)
> 102. since leaving high school?
> 103. Have you seen all of the Star Wars movies?
> 104. in one 24 hour period?
> 105. Have you seen all of the Star Trek films?
> 106. in one 30 hour period?
> 107. Have you ever owned a pair of Spock ears?
> Have you ever read anything by...
> 108. ...Douglas Adams?
> 109. ...Isaac Asimov?
> 110. ...Robert H. Heinlein?
> 111. ...Piers Anthony?
> 112. ...J.R.R. Tolkein?
> 113. ...TSR Hobbies? (i.e. a novel published by the D&D people)
> 114. Have you ever read -Innumeracy-?
> 115. Have you ever read -Cultural-Literacy-?
> 116. Do you own an encyclopedia?
> 117. Have you ever read an encyclopedia entry that you weren't
researching?
> 118. Do you own an almanac? (World, Farmer's)
> 119. Do you own an atlas?
> 120. Do you own a globe?
> 121. and have it on display? (on a desk, bookshelf...)
> 122. that has bumps corresponding to mountain ranges?
> 123. Have you ever used a chemistry set?
> 124. since the age of 13?
> 125. Have you ever used a rare earth element?
> 126. Have you ever dissected something?
> 127. while not involved in a biology class?
> 128. Have you ever bought something from Radio Shack?
> 129. Have you ever used an oscilloscope?
> 130. Have you ever used a microscope?
> 131. Have you ever used a telescope?
> 132. Do you own a voltmeter?
> 133. Do you own any remote controlled vehicals?
> 134. Can you program the time on a VCR?
> 135. Can you understand the owner's manual for electronic equipment?
> 136. Have you ever faxed something?
> 137. Do you own a cellular phone? (car phone)
> 138. Do you own a non-standard calculator? (scientific, programmable)
> 139. Do you have a slide rule?
> 140. and now how to use it?
> 141. Do you own a pencil case?
> 142. Do you own a mechanical pencil?
> 143. and have refills for it?
> 144. Do you own a laboratory notebook?
> 145. Do you own any graph paper? (quadruled)
> 146. Do you own any log or semi-log paper?
> 147. Do you own a table of integrals?
> 148. Do you play chess?
> 149. Were you ever on a chess team?
> 150. Were you ever on a math team?
> 151. Were you ever on a debate team?
> 152. Did you ever try out for a "trivia team"? (college bowl, JEOPARDY)
> 153. Were you ever in a science fair?
> 154. that you placed in the top three?
> 155. Have you ever made a technical joke?
> 156. that no one around you understood?
> 157. that everyone around you understood?
> 158. Do you own a slinky?
> 159 Have you ever analyzed a slinky physically?
> 160. Do you own a Rubik's cube?
> 161. Are you able to solve Rubik's Cube?
> 162. without using the book?
> 163. in less than two minutes?
>
> SECTION 3: clothing and personality
>
> 164. Do both of your socks match?
> 165. Do you own a digital watch?
> 166. that plays music?
> 167. that's currently set to chime on the hour?
> 168. that has a calculator built in?
> 169. Do you have acne?
> 170. Do you have greasy hair?
> 171. without realizing it?
> 172. Do you own any clothing with scientific knowledge printed on it?
> (t-shirts with Maxwell's equations)
> 173. Are your pants too short?
> 174. Is your outfit coordinated? (have someone else evaluate this)
> 175. Have you ever worn a button-down shirt and left the tails hanging
out?
> 176. Are you socially inept?
> 177. Do you have a tough time remembering people's names?
> 178. but no trouble with their numeric data? (phone#, SS#,
address)
> 179. Are you taking this test alone?
> 180. Did you NOT go to your Senior Prom?
> 181. Did you go stag to your Senior Prom?
> 182. Do you talk to yourself?
> 183. when other people are around?
> 184. Do you talk to imaginary people?
> 185. Have you ever found a grammatical error in a published book?
> 186. Have you ever contemplated the meaning of life/existance of God?
> 187. while not drunk?
> 188. while alone?
> 189. Do you wear glasses?
> 190. Is your vision worse than 20/40? (in either eye)
> 191. Is your vision worse than 20/80? (in either eye)
> 192. Are you legally blind? (in either eye)
> 193. Do you own a pocket protector?
> 194. and are wearing it?
> 195. Was your SAT math more than 300 above your verbal?
> 196. Did you score higher than 1200 combined on the SAT?
> 197. Is your IQ greater than your weight?
> 198. Is your purity test score higher than your nerdity test score?
> 199. Have you asked for a technical clarification of anything on this
test?
> 200. Have you ever thought of a question that belongs on this test?
> ***Please send it to: ICTX@vax5.cit.cornell.edu
>
> Please put your pencils down. That's it, hope you enjoyed.
>
> This test compiled by yours truly: Jeff Bennett
ICTX@vax5.cit.cornell.edu.
> Special thanks for their contributions to:
> Rahul Verma: rv0s+@andrew.cmu.edu for providing me with the
original
> 100 question version of the test which sparked this current version.
Thanks
> so much.
> Thomas S. Marlowe: KYRIE@coos.dartmouth.edu for forwarding me a
> copy of his own version of the test. Many of the questions on this version
> were directly lifted from that version and many more of the questions were
> sparked by something contained within it.
>
> For more information or a copy of the current version drop me a
line.
> If you'd like to make a contribution: please send only your original
questions
> (not a listing of the entire test, please) as well as your name and UserID
so
> that proper crediting can be done. Thanks in advance.
>
> Please feel free to distribute this at will.
>
*****************************************************************************
