[640] in Humor
HUMOR: Tenured Grad Students
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Andrew A. Bennett)
Mon Jan 2 00:23:24 1995
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Mon, 02 Jan 1995 00:18:14 EST
From: "Andrew A. Bennett" <abennett@MIT.EDU>
Um, how many of these have to be true before you qualify?
-Drew
Date: Fri, 30 Dec 1994 19:34:12 +0000 (GMT)
From: Espacionaute Spiff domine! <MATOSSIAN@aries.colorado.edu>
...
Forwarded-by: chk@cs.rice.edu (Chuck Koelbel)
This from no less an authority than our department chair...
In article <9412220254.AA22410@cs.rice.edu>, vardi@cs.rice.EDU
(Moshe Vardi) writes:
How long do you have to be in grad school to be considered 'tenured'?
Isn't it more a state of mind rather than a time limit?
Other possible criteria:
You've been at the school longer than your advisor.
You remember when the department chair was an assistant prof.
Students who you TA'd are finishing PhD's before you.
You know the people in the purchasing department on a first name
basis.
You actually understand how the purchasing department works.
You actually understand how the registrar's office works.
You actually understand how your department works.
You actually know where every piece of equipment is in your
lab.
You can't tell "I remember when" stories, because you've
forgotten them.
You can no longer read Alt.grad.tenured and tell yourself that
you're not like those tenured grad students.
You go to conferences, and people think that you are faculty.
The Dean asks, "I thought you had finished up already".
You can no longer live on a diet of Jolt, Mac & Cheese, and Bugles.
You feel like you actually need to sleep.
Issues like Health Insurance become really important to you.
All the bars you remember from your undergrad days are closed.
