[53] in Humor
HUMOR: Headlines
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (abennett@MIT.EDU)
Fri Feb 4 10:52:11 1994
From: abennett@MIT.EDU
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Fri, 04 Feb 94 10:49:52 EST
Date: 3 Feb 1994 08:45:37 +0500
From: "Sharalee Field" <sharalee@planning.mit.edu>
From: "Emily Cikovsky" <ECIKOVSK@us.oracle.com>
--------------------------------------
Date: 2/3/94 8:41 AM
(forwards deleted)
>
> FUNNY NEWS HEADLINES
>
> Something went wrong in jet crash, experts say
>
> Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers
>
> Safety experts say school bus passengers should be belted
>
> Drunk gets nine months in violin case
>
> Survivor of siamese twins joins parents
>
> Farmer Bill dies in house
>
> Iraqi head seeks arms
>
> Is there a ring of debris around Uranus?
>
> Stud tires out
>
> Prostitutes appeal to Pope
>
> Panda mating fails, veterinarian takes over
>
> Soviet virgin lands short of goal again
>
> British left waffles on Falkland Islands
>
> Lung cancer in women mushrooms
>
> Eye drops off shelf
>
> Teacher strikes idle kids
>
> Reagan wins on budget, but more lies ahead
>
> Shot off woman's leg helps Nicklaus to 66
>
> Enraged cow injures farmer with axe
>
> Plane too close to ground, crash probe told
>
> Miners refuse to work after death
>
> Squad helps dog bite victim
>
> Juvenile court to try shooting defendant
>
> Stolen painting found by tree
>
> Two Soviet ships collide, one dies
>
> Two sisters reunited after 18 years at checkout counter
>
> Killer sentenced to die for second time in 10 years
>
> Never withhold herpes infection from loved one
>
> Drunken drivers paid $1000 in '84
>
> War dims hope for peace
>
> If strike isn't settled quickly, it may last a while
>
> Cold wave linked to temperature
>
> Enfiels couple slain, police suspect homicide
******************************************************************************
Suzanne Lamar * Home Phone: (510) 769-7182
Haas School of Business, UCB * E-mail: suzanne@haas.berkeley.edu
******************************************************************************
