[3433] in Humor
Fw: A Tomato Story
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Me)
Thu Apr 5 14:07:49 2001
Message-Id: <4.3.2.7.2.20010405140247.0269e930@po14.mit.edu>
Date: Thu, 05 Apr 2001 14:03:21 -0400
To: humor@mit.edu
From: Me <jerrod@alum.mit.edu>
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>Sent: Tuesday, April 03, 2001 10:52 AM
>Subject: A Tomato Story
>
>An unemployed man goes to apply for a job with Microsoft as a janitor. The
>manager there arranges for him to take an aptitude test -- (Floors, sweeping
>and cleaning).
>
>After the test, the manager says, "You will be employed at minimum wage,
>$5.15 an hour. Let me have your e-mail address, so that I can send you a form
>to complete and tell you where to report for work on your first day.
>
>Taken aback, the man protests that he has neither a computer nor an e-mail
>address. To this the MS manager replies, "Well, then, that means that you
>virtually don't exist and can therefore hardly expect to be employed.
>
>Stunned, the man leaves. Not knowing where to turn and having only $10 in his
>wallet, he decides to buy a 25 lb. flat of tomatoes at the supermarket.
>
>Within less than 2 hours, he sells all the tomatoes individually at 100%
>profit. Repeating the process several times more that day, he ends up with
>almost $100 before going to sleep that night. And thus it dawns on him that
>he could quite easily make a living selling tomatoes. Getting up early every
>day and going to bed late, he multiplies his profits quickly.
>
>After a short time he acquires a cart to transport several dozen boxes of
>tomatoes, only to have to trade it in again so that he can buy a pickup truck
>to support his expanding business. By the end of the second year, he is the
>owner of a fleet of pickup trucks and manages a staff of a hundred former
>unemployed people, all selling tomatoes.
>
>Planning for the future of his wife and children, he decides to buy some life
>insurance. Consulting with an insurance adviser, he picks an insurance plan
>to fit his new circumstances. At the end of the telephone conversation, the
>adviser asks him for his e-mail address to send the final documents
>electronically.
>
>When the man replies that he has no e-mail, the adviser is stunned, "What,
>you don't have e-mail? How on earth have you managed to amass such wealth
>without the Internet, e-mail and e-commerce? Just imagine where you would be
>now, if you had been connected to the internet from the very start!"
>
>After a moment of thought, the tomato millionaire replied, "Why, of course! I
>would be a floor cleaner at Microsoft!"
>
>Moral of this story:
>1. The Internet, e-mail and e-commerce do not need to rule your life.
>2. If you don't have e-mail, but work hard, you can still become a
>millionaire.
>3. Since you got this story via e-mail, you're probably closer to becoming a
>janitor than you are to becoming a millionaire.
>4. If you do have a computer and e-mail, you probably have already been taken
>to the cleaners by Microsoft.
/----------------------------------------------------------\
/ Jerrod Wiesman | A knight born too late, \
| jerrod@alum.mit.edu | to a world without dragons |
| \_|_/ |
\ IM:DiagontiTheFiery | http://www.jerrod.net/jerrod/ /
\----------------------------------------------------------/
