[2964] in Humor

home help back first fref pref prev next nref lref last post

Evolution of a Programmer

daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (mmrr)
Mon Oct 4 14:27:27 1999

To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Mon, 04 Oct 1999 14:25:17 -0400
From: mmrr <jsmthng@MIT.EDU>


(apologies if you've seen this already)

------- Forwarded Message

The Evolution of a Programmer

            Jr.High

                    10 PRINT "HELLO WORLD"
                    20 END

            High School

                    program Hello(input, output)
                     begin
                        writeln('Hello World')
                     end.

            First year in College

                    (define (hello)
                        (cons 'Hello (list 'World))))

            Senior year in College

                    import java.io.*;
                    public static void main(String argv[]) {
                      System.out.println("Hello World");
                      return;
                    }

            New professional

                    #include
                    void main(void)
                    {
                      char *message[] = {"Hello ", "World"};
                      int i;

                      for(i = 0; i < 2; ++i)
                        printf("%s", message[i]);
                      printf("\n");
                    }

            Seasoned professional

                    #include
                    #include

                    class string
                    {
                    private:
                      int size;
                      char *ptr;

                    public:
                      string() : size(0), ptr(new char('\0')) {}

                      string(const string &s) : size(s.size)
                      {
                        ptr = new char[size + 1];
                        strcpy(ptr, s.ptr);
                      }

                      ~string()
                      {
                        delete [] ptr;
                      }

                      friend ostream &perator<<<< s.ptr);
                    }

                    string &string::operator=(const char *chrs)
                    {
                      if (this != &chrs)
                      {
                        delete [] ptr;
                       size = strlen(chrs);
                        ptr = new char[size + 1];
                        strcpy(ptr, chrs);
                      }
                      return(*this);
                    }

                    int main()
                    {
                      string str;

                      str = "Hello World";
                      cout << str << endl;

                      return(0);
                    }


            Master Programmer

                    [
                    uuid(2573F8F4-CFEE-101A-9A9F-00AA00342820)
                    ]
                    library LHello
                    {
                        // bring in the master library
                        importlib("actimp.tlb");
                        importlib("actexp.tlb");

                        // bring in my interfaces
                        #include "pshlo.idl"

                        [
                        uuid(2573F8F5-CFEE-101A-9A9F-00AA00342820)
                        ]
                        cotype THello
                     {
                     interface IHello;
                     interface IPersistFile;
                     };
                    };

                    [
                    exe,
                    uuid(2573F890-CFEE-101A-9A9F-00AA00342820)
                    ]
                    module CHelloLib
                    {

                        // some code related header files
                        importheader();
                        importheader();
                        importheader();
                        importheader("pshlo.h");
                        importheader("shlo.hxx");
                        importheader("mycls.hxx");

                        // needed typelibs
                        importlib("actimp.tlb");
                        importlib("actexp.tlb");
                        importlib("thlo.tlb");

                        [
                        uuid(2573F891-CFEE-101A-9A9F-00AA00342820),
                        aggregatable
                        ]
                        coclass CHello
                     {
                     cotype THello;
                     };
                    };

                    #include "ipfix.hxx"

                    extern HANDLE hEvent;

                    class CHello : public CHelloBase
                    {
                    public:
                       IPFIX(CLSID_CHello);

                        CHello(IUnknown *pUnk);
                        ~CHello();

                        HRESULT  __stdcall PrintSz(LPWSTR pwszString);

                    private:
                        static int cObjRef;
                    };

                    #include
                    #include
                    #include
                    #include
                    #include "thlo.h"
                    #include "pshlo.h"
                    #include "shlo.hxx"
                    #include "mycls.hxx"

                    int CHello::cObjRef = 0;

                    CHello::CHello(IUnknown *pUnk) : CHelloBase(pUnk)
                    {
                        cObjRef++;
                        return;
                    }

                    HRESULT  __stdcall  CHello::PrintSz(LPWSTR pwszString)
                    {
                        printf("%ws\n", pwszString);
                        return(ResultFromScode(S_OK));
                    }

                    CHello::~CHello(void)
                    {

                    // when the object count goes to zero, stop the server
                    cObjRef--;
                    if( cObjRef == 0 )
                        PulseEvent(hEvent);

                    return;
                    }

                    #include
                    #include
                    #include "pshlo.h"
                    #include "shlo.hxx"
                    #include "mycls.hxx"

                    HANDLE hEvent;
                    int _cdecl main(
                    int argc,
                    char * argv[]
                    ) {
                    ULONG ulRef;
                    DWORD dwRegistration;
                    CHelloCF *pCF = new CHelloCF();

                    hEvent = CreateEvent(NULL, FALSE, FALSE, NULL);

                    // Initialize the OLE libraries
                    CoInitializeEx(NULL, COINIT_MULTITHREADED);

                    CoRegisterClassObject(CLSID_CHello, pCF,
                        CLSCTX_LOCAL_SERVER, REGCLS_MULTIPLEUSE,
                        &dwRegistration);

                    // wait on an event to stop
                    WaitForSingleObject(hEvent, INFINITE);

                    // revoke and release the class object
                    CoRevokeClassObject(dwRegistration);
                    ulRef = pCF->Release();

                    // Tell OLE we are going away.
                    CoUninitialize();

                    return(0);
                    }

                    extern CLSID CLSID_CHello;
                    extern UUID LIBID_CHelloLib;

                    CLSID CLSID_CHello = {
                        /* 2573F891-CFEE-101A-9A9F-00AA00342820 */
                        0x2573F891,
                        0xCFEE,
                        0x101A,
                        { 0x9A, 0x9F, 0x00, 0xAA, 0x00, 0x34, 0x28, 0x20 }
                    };

                    UUID LIBID_CHelloLib = {
                        /* 2573F890-CFEE-101A-9A9F-00AA00342820 */
                        0x2573F890,
                        0xCFEE,
                        0x101A,
                        { 0x9A, 0x9F, 0x00, 0xAA, 0x00, 0x34, 0x28, 0x20 }
                    };

                    #include
                    #include
                    #include
                    #include
                    #include
                    #include "pshlo.h"
                    #include "shlo.hxx"
                    #include "clsid.h"

                    int _cdecl main(
                    int argc,
                    char * argv[]
                    ) {
                    HRESULT  hRslt;
                    IHello        *pHello;
                    ULONG  ulCnt;
                    IMoniker * pmk;
                    WCHAR  wcsT[_MAX_PATH];
                    WCHAR  wcsPath[2 * _MAX_PATH];

                    // get object path
                    wcsPath[0] = '\0';
                    wcsT[0] = '\0';
                    if( argc > 1) {
                        mbstowcs(wcsPath, argv[1], strlen(argv[1]) + 1);
                        wcsupr(wcsPath);
                        }
                    else {
                        fprintf(stderr, "Object path must be specified\n");
                        return(1);
                        }

                    // get print string
                    if(argc > 2)
                        mbstowcs(wcsT, argv[2], strlen(argv[2]) + 1);
                    else
                        wcscpy(wcsT, L"Hello World");

                    printf("Linking to object %ws\n", wcsPath);
                    printf("Text String %ws\n", wcsT);

                    // Initialize the OLE libraries
                    hRslt = CoInitializeEx(NULL, COINIT_MULTITHREADED);

                    if(SUCCEEDED(hRslt)) {

                        hRslt = CreateFileMoniker(wcsPath, &pmk);
                        if(SUCCEEDED(hRslt))>
                        hRslt = BindMoniker(pmk, 0, IID_IHello,
                                  (void **)&pHello);

                        if(SUCCEEDED(hRslt)) {

                     // print a string out
                     pHello->PrintSz(wcsT);

                     Sleep(2000);
                     ulCnt = pHello->Release();
                     }
                        else
                     printf("Failure to connect, status: %lx", hRslt);

                        // Tell OLE we are going away.
                        CoUninitialize();
                        }

                    return(0);
                    }

            Apprentice Hacker

                    #!/usr/local/bin/perl
                    $msg="Hello, world.\n";
                    if ($#ARGV >= 0) {
                      while(defined($arg=shift(@ARGV))) {
                        $outfilename = $arg;
                        open(FILE, ">" . $outfilename) ||
                                    die "Can't write $arg: $!\n";
                        print (FILE $msg);
                        close(FILE) || die "Can't close $arg: $!\n";
                      }
                    } else {
                      print ($msg);
                    }
                    1;

            Experienced Hacker

                    #include
                    #define S "Hello, World\n"
                    main(){exit(printf(S) == strlen(S) ? 0 : 1);}


            Seasoned Hacker

                    % cc -o a.out ~/src/misc/hw/hw.c
                    % a.out


            Guru Hacker

                    % cat
                    Hello, world.
                    ^D

            New Manager

                    10 PRINT "HELLO WORLD"
                    20 END


            Middle Manager

                    mail -s "Hello, world." bob@b12
                    Bob, could you please write me a program that
                    prints "Hello,world."?  I need it by tomorrow.
                    ^D

            Senior Manager

                    % zmail jim
                    I need a "Hello, world." program by this afternoon.

            Chief Executive

                    % letter
                    letter: Command not found.
                    % mail
                    To: ^X ^F ^C
                    % help mail
                    help: Command not found.
                    % damn!
                    !: Event unrecognized
                   % logout

------- End of Forwarded Message


home help back first fref pref prev next nref lref last post