[2527] in Humor
HUMOR: Redneck Jedis
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Erik Nygren)
Thu Oct 29 16:59:45 1998
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Cc: kt@MIT.EDU, sniemczy@MIT.EDU, sashew@csua.berkeley.edu
Date: Thu, 29 Oct 1998 15:56:57 EST
From: Erik Nygren <nygren@MIT.EDU>
------- Forwarded Message
From: "John Galt Productions" <john_galt_prod@hotmail.com>
You might be a Redneck Jedi if...
* You've ever said the phrase, "May the force be with y'all."
* Your Jedi robe is a camouflage color.
* You've ever used your light saber to open a bottle of
Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill.
* At least one wing of your X-Wing is primer colored.
* You have bantha horns on the front of your land speeder.
* You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok.
* You've ever had an X-wing up on blocks in your yard.
* You ever lost a hand during a light saber fight because
you had to spit.
* The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is the dadgum
skeeters.
* Wookies are offended by your BO
* You've ever used the force to get yourself another beer
so you didn't have to wait for a commercial.
* You've ever used the force in conjunction with
fishing/bowling.
* Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son, come on over
to the darkside...it'll be a hoot."
* You've ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense
electro-shock thingy to get the barbecue grill to light.
* You have a confederate flag painted on the hood of your
landspeeder.
* You think Han Solo would look better in a flannel cause
he looks like a little sissy in that vest.
* You've ever fantasized about Princess Leah wearing Daisy Duke
shorts.
* You have the doors of your X-wing welded shut and you have
to get in through the window.
* Although you had to kill him, you kinda thought that
Jabba the Hutt had a pretty good handle on how to treat
his women.
* You ever fell in love with your sister.
* You've ever accidentally referred to Darth Vader's evil
empire as "them damn Yankees."
* You have a cousin who bears a strong resemblance to Chewbacca.
* You suggested that they outfit the Millennium Falcon with a
redwood deck.
* You were the only person drinking Jack Daniels on the rocks
during the cantina scene.
* In your opinion, that Darth Vader fellow just "ain't right."
SNIP
------- End of Forwarded Message
