[2448] in Humor
(Not Quite) HUMOR: Would you survive?
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Sharalee M. Field)
Thu Sep 10 09:09:52 1998
Date: Thu, 10 Sep 1998 09:07:14 -0400
To: humor@MIT.EDU, mowu@MIT.EDU, "MEGallagh@aol.com" <MEGallagh@aol.com>,
wheger@wbc-architects.com,
"kris.m.kelly@us.pwcglobal.com" <kris.m.kelly@us.pwcglobal.com>,
jbran18610@aol.com, dunbar@MIT.EDU, dahv@MIT.EDU, mtsai@bqa.com,
immer@MIT.EDU, jack.gingras@ae.ge.com, tlawlor@palmerdodge.com,
nkahn@gph.com, GDeVoe@rimco.com,
"Jean, Marc (GEAE)" <marc.jean@ae.ge.com>, celia_kent@harvard.edu,
Maryellen Fitzgibbon <mfitzgib@fas.harvard.edu>,
cjwells@fas.harvard.edu,
Cheryl Guarino Buccelli <c_buccelli@harvard.edu>,
leite@fas.harvard.edu
From: "Sharalee M. Field" <sharalee_field@harvard.edu>
>From: Connie Kleinjans <connie@nanospace.com>
>Subject: INTERESTING: Would you survive?
>
>From: Rochelle Grober <rocky@fjst.com>
>Forwarded message from MoodyJim@aol.com
>
>The Air Force Survival School at Fairchild AFB, Washington State,
>trains more than 6,000 officers and enlisted air crews a year in the
>art of survival. Four of its top instructors created this test:
>
>
>1) A helicopter's circling overhead and you've got to build a signal
>fire -- but quick. Which of the following items is the least useful in
>creating smoke?
>
> a) Branches from evergreen trees
>
> b) Hardwood without the bark
>
> c) Animal dung
>
> d) Damp Leaves
>
>
>2) A ring around the moon means that within 24 hours you can expect:
>
> a) Clear skies
>
> b) High winds
>
> c) Rain
>
> d) Snow
>
>
>3)If you're trying to catch fish for food, a raft out on the water
>creates a shadow beneath it that:
>
> a) Attracts fish
>
> b) Scares fish off
>
>
>4) You've survived the mountain lion's attack, but now you're a bloody
>mess. Which of the following releases enzymes that can stave off
>infection?
>
> a) Earthworms
>
> b) Daddy-longlegs
>
> c) Leeches
>
> d) Maggots
>
>
>5) True or False? If you're stranded and thirsty and there's no water
>in sight, you should drink your own urine?
>
>
>6) If you chew on the bark of a white willow tree, you get:
>
> a) A mild painkiller
>
> b) A lifesaving dose of both fiber and protein
>
> c) A sugar rush
>
> d) Enough poison to severely stiffen your joints
>
>
>7) Which of the following berry group is almost always safe to eat?
>
> a) Berries that are blue
>
> b) Berries that have leaves with rounded edges
>
> c) Berries that are red
>
> d) Clumps of smaller berries that make up one berry
>
>
>8) True or False? Plants with milky sap may be poisonous and should not
>be eaten.
>
>
>9) You took a wrong turn on the ski trail, and now you're tired and
>cold. By digging through the snow to the soil below, you can make a
>bed for yourself and increase your body temperature by how many
>degrees?
>
> a) 4 to 8
>
> b) 18 to 22
>
> c) 30 to 35
>
>
>10) You're stranded in the snow-packed mountains, wracked by thirst.
>You should:
>
> a) Melt ice, because it is purer than snow
>
> b) Melt snow, because it requires less heat than ice
>
> c) Melt ice, because it yields more water per unit volume
>
>
>
>ANSWERS:
>
>
>1 b) Hardwood burns, but without the bark - which retains moisture -
>you won't get a cigar's worth of smoke.
>
>2 c) Cirrostratus clouds, made up in part by tiny ice crystals, usually
>indicate rain. When light from the moon is refracted through the
>crystals, it loosks like a ring.
>
>3 a) In the shade, fish can comfortably hunt for food close to the
>surface without having to brave the sun's heat.
>
>4 d) Let bluebottle flies land on your wounds. They'll lay larvae, and
>the maggots will actually eat your dead flesh. Then they'll leave
>behind enzymes that fight infection and promote healing.
>
>5 False. Never drink urine. It contains harmful body wastes and
>dehydrates you.
>
>6 a) The willow bark contains salicin, which in its synthetic form is
>the main ingredient in aspirin. Munch on a handful for a solid dose.
>
>7 d) In the US, all "aggregate" berries (blackberries, raspberries) are
>safe to eat. What about berries that are blue or black? About 90
>percent are safe; 50 percent of red berries but just 10 percent of
>white and green berries are safe.
>
>8 True. Stick with plants that have clear sap or fluid. Dandelions
>are an exception.
>
>9 c) The heat is due to ground radiation from within the earth. To
>trap even more heat, line your bed with pine needles or dead leaves and
>cover your shelter with snow or tree branches.
>
>10 c) Snow consists primarily of air, sometimes up to 60 percent. Ice
>is compacted, frozen water.
>
>
