[2335] in Humor
Win98 Error Haikus
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Mark A. Herschberg)
Wed Jun 10 11:45:11 1998
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Wed, 10 Jun 1998 11:31:08 EDT
From: "Mark A. Herschberg" <hershey@MIT.EDU>
Date: Wed, 10 Jun 1998 10:42:35 +0900
From: David Lewinnek <d-lewinnek@t.rd.honda.co.jp>
- ------- Forwarded Message
> > > Apparently Microsoft hired some Japanese developers for
> > > Windows 98, and these are their error messages:
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > A file that big?
> > > It might be very useful.
> > > But now it is gone.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > The Web site you seek
> > > cannot be located but
> > > endless others exist
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Chaos reigns within.
> > > Reflect, repent, and reboot.
> > > Order shall return.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > ABORTED effort:
> > > Close all that you have.
> > > You ask far too much.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > First snow, then silence.
> > > This thousand dollar screen dies
> > > so beautifully.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > With searching comes loss
> > > and the presence of absence:
> > > "My Novel" not found.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > The Tao that is seen
> > > Is not the true Tao, until
> > > You bring fresh toner.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Windows NT crashed.
> > > I am the Blue Screen of Death.
> > > No one hears your screams.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Stay the patient course
> > > Of little worth is your ire
> > > The network is down
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > A crash reduces
> > > your expensive computer
> > > to a simple stone.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Yesterday it worked
> > > Today it is not working
> > > Windows is like that
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Three things are certain:
> > > Death, taxes, and lost data.
> > > Guess which has occurred.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > You step in the stream,
> > > but the water has moved on.
> > > This page is not here.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Out of memory.
> > > We wish to hold the whole sky,
> > > But we never will.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Having been erased,
> > > The document you're seeking
> > > Must now be retyped.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Rather than a beep
> > > Or a rude error message,
> > > These words: "File not found."
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Serious error.
> > > All shortcuts have disappeared.
> > > Screen. Mind. Both are blank.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Everything is gone;
> > > Your life's work has been destroyed.
> > > Squeeze trigger (yes/no)?
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Seeing my great fault
> > > Through darkening blue windows
> > > I begin again
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > The code was willing,
> > > It considered your request,
> > > But the chips were weak.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Printer not ready.
> > > Could be a fatal error.
> > > Have a pen handy?
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Errors have occurred.
> > > We won't tell you where or why.
> > > Lazy programmers.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Server's poor response
> > > Not quick enough for browser.
> > > Timed out, plum blossom.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Login incorrect.
> > > Only perfect spellers may
> > > enter this system.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > This site has been moved.
> > > We'd tell you where, but then
> > > we'd have to delete you.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > Wind catches lily
> > > Scatt'ring petals to the wind:
> > > Segmentation fault
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > There is a chasm
> > > of carbon and silicon
> > > the software can't bridge
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > To have no errors
> > > Would be life without meaning
> > > No struggle, no joy
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > No keyboard present
> > > Hit F1 to continue
> > > Zen engineering?
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > > The ten thousand things
> > > How long do any persist?
> > > Netscape, too, has gone.
> > >
> > > ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
> > >
> > >
> >
> >
>=20
- ------- End of Forwarded Message
------- End of Forwarded Message
