[1792] in Humor

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HUMOR: Microsoft Resturant

daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (abennett@MIT.EDU)
Fri Jan 3 10:43:38 1997

From: <abennett@MIT.EDU>
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Fri, 03 Jan 1997 10:31:06 EST


Date: Fri, 3 Jan 1997 00:41:42 -0800
From: connie@interserve.com (Connie Kleinjans)
From: Paul Farley <72253.3153@CompuServe.COM>
From: lainet@techpub1 (Laine Tammer)

If restaurants functioned like MICROSOFT:

Patron: Waiter!

Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill, and I'll be your Support Waiter. What
        seems to be the problem?

Patron: There's a fly in my soup!

Waiter: Try again, maybe the fly won't be there this time.

Patron: No, it's still there.

Waiter: Maybe it's the way you're using the soup; try eating it
        with a fork instead.

Patron: Even when I use the fork, the fly is still there.

Waiter: Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl; what kind of
        bowl are  you using?
Patron: A SOUP bowl!

Waiter: Hmmm, that should work.  Maybe it's a configuration
        problem; how was the bowl set up?

Patron: You brought it to me on a saucer; what has that to do with
        the fly in my soup?!
Waiter: Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the
        fly in your soup?

Patron: I sat down and ordered the Soup of the Day!

Waiter: Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the
        Day?

Patron: You have more than one Soup of the Day each day??

Waiter: Yes, the Soup of the Day is changed every hour.

Patron: Well, what is the Soup of the Day now?

Waiter: The current Soup of the Day is tomato.

Patron: Fine.  Bring me the tomato soup, and the check.  I'm
        running late now.
Waiter leaves and returns with another bowl of soup and the check

Waiter: Here you are, Sir.  The soup and your check.

Patron: This is potato soup.

Waiter: Yes, the tomato soup wasn't ready yet.

Patron: Well, I'm so hungry now, I'll eat anything.

Waiter leaves.

Patron: Waiter!  There's a gnat in my soup!


The check:
Soup of the Day . ........... . . .   $5.0
Upgrade to newer Soup of the Day. . . $2.5
Access to support . . . . . . . . . . $1.0

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