[1753] in Humor
Fwd: I'm Dreaming of a Geek Christmas
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (LMCCOOPER@aol.com)
Thu Dec 12 01:03:38 1996
From: <LMCCOOPER@aol.com>
Date: Thu, 12 Dec 1996 00:54:50 -0500
To: alexhi@microsoft.com, humor@MIT.EDU
Cc: htcooper@princeton.edu, jhl@uh.edu, hstuart@bite.db.uth.tmc.edu,
joewhite@joewhite.com, ljhurst@washington1.xtn.net,
BBRC200@barms019.b-r.com, speacock@onramp.net,
mburniston@accesscomm.net, KAREN.DURHAM@netpmsa.cnet.navy.mil,
dwight@tenet.edu, saishman@astro.princeton.edu, prussell@salsem.ac.at,
michaell@microsoft.com, benyon@briarwood.houston.tx.us,
scottnco@flash.net, marlo@marlomedia.com, Lhowey@aol.com,
JAHaight@paranet.com, weave@MIT.EDU, slosberg@chemvx.tamu.edu,
ksp36242@bayou.uh.edu, salsup@smith-intl.com
Oh Alex..this one is for you!!!!!!!!! Sing along now!!!!!And don't tell me
the microserfs got it last week and you didn't think it was funny....:-)
---------------------
Forwarded message:
From: mburniston@accesscomm.net (Martin Burniston)
To: LMCCOOPER@aol.com
Date: 96-12-11 22:33:51 EST
Lynn:
Please do the forwarding honours. See you tomorrow night.
Folks:
All together now, let's sing...
>>>The Bill Gates Christmas Song
>>>(Sung to "Chestunuts Roasting In an Open File")
>>>
>>>Netscape roasting on an open fire, Apple begging on its knees, Photo
>>>popping up on Time magazine, Yes, Bill Gates dreams of days like these!
>>>Everybody knows he's never fully satisfied, Throws himself behind each
>>>task. World dominion is his company's goal. Well, hey, is that so much to
>>>ask?
>>>
>>>He knows the world is in his sway,
>>>We'll buy whatever software he might toss our way, We'll surf his
Internet,
>>>watch his TV, He'll take us anywhere we ask him-for a fee.
>>>And so we're offering this simple prayer, To Bill and all his MS grunts:
>>>Since we all follow any standard you write,
>>>Make it good, please,
>>>Make it good, please,
>>>Make it good, please, just once!
>>>
>>>Microsoft
>>>---------
>>>(to the tune of "Jingle Bells")
>>>
>>>Nine-tenths of a gig,
>>>Biggest ever seen,
>>>Man, this program's big-
>>>MS Word 15!
>>>Comes on ten CDs,
>>>All part of the plan!
>>>Word is fine, but jeez-
>>>60 megs of RAM?!
>>>
>>>Oh! Microsoft, Microsoft,
>>>Bloatware all the way!
>>>I've sat here installing Word
>>>Since breakfast yesterday!
>>>Oh! Microsoft, Microsoft,
>>>Moderation, please.
>>>Guess you hadn't noticed:
>>>Four-gig drives don't grow on trees!
>>>
>>>Happily Addicted to the Web
>>>---------------------------
>>>(to the tune of "Winter Wonderland")
>>>
>>>Doorbell rings, I'm not list'nin',
>>>>From my mouth, drool is glist'nin',
>>>I'm happy-although
>>>My boss let me go-
>>>Happily addicted to the Web.
>>>All night long, I sit clicking,
>>>Unaware time is ticking,
>>>There's beard on my cheek,
>>>Same clothes for a week,
>>>Happily addicted to the Web.
>>>
>>>Friends come by; they shake me,
>>>Saying, "Yo, man!
>>>Don't you know tonight's the senior prom?"
>>>With a listless shrug, I mutter, "No, man;
>>>I just discovered letterman-dot-com!"
>>>
>>>I don't phone, don't send faxes,
>>>Don't go out, don't pay taxes,
>>>Who cares if someday
>>>They drag me away?
>>>I'm happily addicted to the Web!
