[1307] in Humor
HUMOR: Osculate
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Andrew A. Bennett)
Thu Feb 15 21:57:08 1996
To: humor@MIT.EDU
Date: Thu, 15 Feb 1996 21:40:01 EST
From: "Andrew A. Bennett" <abennett@MIT.EDU>
Date: Thu, 15 Feb 1996 21:24:56 -0500
From: Erik Nygren <nygren@MIT.EDU>
From: katyking@MIT.EDU
I know it's late, but this is pretty funny.
From: Betsy King <kingb@freenet.scri.fsu.edu>
From: JIM MICA OFFICE OF ADMISSION ITHACA COLLEGE <JMICA@OA.ITHACA.EDU>
Subject: Mathematics and Valentine's Day
And Here I Thought a Kiss is Just a Kiss!
Jim Mica
It's Valentine's Day here in the Untied States. I know lots of
other cultures make some reference to this holiday, but for us
here it is a confusing time when lovers are supposed to exchange
boxes of sweets which will make them less attractive to each
other in the long run. Since it is a day for lovers, I turned to
my first love, words. My Word-For-The-Day calendar has the word
'osculate' on display today.
Now, the Latin scholars amongst us will immediately note that
osculate --meaning to kiss-- comes from *osculum* meaning "little
mouth." According to my calendar, osculate is "used only
humorously today." What else would we expect for a holiday
largely devoted to a tittering, sophomoric conception of
heterosexual love! But wait! My calendar also provides a
shocking revelation: "In math, osculate describes a type of
contact ... between certain curves or surfaces."
Holy non-linear equations Batman! Mathematicians are concerned
with osculation! I mean, this is pretty radical! I know that
since the 30s mathematicians have felt incomplete. Recently they
have gone all "fuzzy" on us. Now, I find out, they know how to
osculate!
Well, I guess that's it for us simple minded but drop-dead
handsome guys. From now on dames are gonna want to get with them
fuzzy, osculating mathematicians. Yep, all the topologists in
the country are probably up to their saddle-points in boxes of
candy today.
Which may just go to show that the Geeks will inherit the girth.
