[1616] in peace2
international monetary guerrilla theater!
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (supply-side aram)
Mon Apr 8 00:18:42 2002
Message-Id: <200204080418.AAA28075@no-knife.mit.edu>
To: peace-announce@MIT.EDU
From: "supply-side aram" <aram@MIT.EDU>
Date: Mon, 08 Apr 2002 00:18:27 -0400
for the rest of the semester we'll be performing a skit in honor of
this june's commencement speaker.
and we want more participants!
it's a lot of fun, pretty easy and not a big time commitment. we just
need a few more people, since some of the actors won't be around for
the whole time.
if you'd like to participate, come to our meeting on tuesday.
---
WHEN: this tuesday (april 9) at 8:15 pm
WHERE: some room on the 2nd floor of bldg 5 (we'll put up a sign)
---
and email me or julias@mit.edu to let me know if you're coming, so we
know how many scripts to print.
here's the play:
The play is pretty short and funny, and involves 7 characters.
Bad guys:
1. CEO: a ruthless investor.
2. Governor: a fry 'em, lock 'em up kind of guy.
3. General: Graduate of the School of the Americas, comandante of
many a death squad.
Sold-his-soul academic:
4. Supply Side Man: economic superhero, with a Permanent Head
Damage (Ph.D) from the Chicago School of Economics. Consultant
to the World Bunk.
Victims:
5. Maquiladora Maria: a worker from the General's country.
6. Stephanie Steelworker: Another worker, from the Governor's state.
7. Patricia Parent: An unemployed single mother, also from the
Governor's state.
Most text goes to the first 4, although Maria must speak one
line of Spanish convincingly.
The General needs to be a guy, but Governor or CEO could be women.
Script of THE RACE TO THE BOTTOM
(CEO is sitting back behind a desk with General and Governor facing
him.)
CEO: (talking on phone) Well, What's in it for me? I'm not just
looking for a sound investment, I'm looking for profit. Look, I'm not
just trying to do favors here. This is business. Look, this
conversation is going nowhere. I'll talk to you later, Mom. (Hangs
up.) Sorry about the delay-some people just call when they're not
wanted. Now, Ive called you here today because I'm looking for an
investment opportunity. Something with a whole new paradigm for
greater profit. What have you got?
General: Well, then you want to invest in my country for sure.
Governments throughout Latin America are pursuing a new paradigm as
the United States democratic trading partners.
Governor: Sir, as a state governor, I can assure you that we can offer
you a secure and attractive investment environment full of productive
workers. As for our partners here, no wise investor would risk their
money in some banana republic. Dont you still have militaries that
shoot people down in marketplaces?
General: Look here, Yankee, we were taught all about human rights from
your experts at the School of the Americas. We are your largest
partners in the war on drugs!
Governor: Listen, you dont have to tell me about the war on drugs.
Lock em up, I say. Hang em high. Any politician who wants to win an
election knows all about that.
CEO: Listen, this is all very nice to hear you bicker, but I'm facing
a challenge! Theres still this bunch of dinosaurs talking about
economic fairness and security, trying to get people to expect it.
They're cutting into my profits. If I'm going to invest in your state
or your country, I need to know what you'll do about that!
Governor: Well, I can talk about national security and hope they get
confused
General: I've got government-backed unions who hardly make any demands
at all.
CEO: Kids, dont waste my time. (whips out cell phone). I have a
merger and a layoff to take care of. Why dont I let you figure it
out, and I'll come back when you're ready (walks offstage)
(As the CEO exits, supply side man enters, tapping on the door.Hes a
geeky economist in thick glasses, ideally with a Superman-style cape
with the letter S on it.) Want his investments? Hire me, and I'll
help you out!
(Both the General and the Governor are skeptical.)
General: Why should I hire you? Who are you?
Governor: What credentials do you have?
Supply Side Man: I'm Supply Side Man, a superhero! I have an advanced
degree - I did my Permanent Head Damage at the Chicago School of
Economics. And I work for the World Bunk!
(The general and the police chief are impressed and nod knowingly.)
General: Ah, Supply Side Man. Yes I've heard about you. I'll hire you.
Even though I've heard rumors that your hands are invisible.
Governor: Ph.D from the Chicago School - consultant for the World Bunk
- impressive! I'll hire you too.
Supply Side Man: OK, lets get to work. You have to be ready to
implement neoliberal economic policies as they apply to streamlining
investment markets. First you must strengthen your macroeconomic
fundamentals as evidenced by all relevant indicators of sustained GDP
growth with low inflation and high labor market flexibility, to
enhance investor confidence in your emerging markets....
Governor: Shut up! I m like our president-I dont like to read and I
dont plan to start now. So tell me simply what it is I need to do!
Supply Side Man: Okay, okay. You must implement structural
adjustment-in both of your countries. People dont know you can do
that in the US, but I'll show you how. But first, we'll need some
people. You! (To the governor.) Bring me a union worker!
Governor: A union worker-that right-to-work law never did pass, so I
can find one. (Goes out, returns with Stephanie Steelworker.) Here
you go.
Supply Side Man: Excellent. This stone-age dinosaur is one of the
main things standing in the way of the market. But there are others,
too. You! (to the General) bring me a worker from your country, too!
And you, (to the governor) get me one of those lazy welfare
recipients.
(Governor and General bring in their charges.)
General: This is Maquiladora Maria, also a worker.
Governor: And this is Patricia Parent, who receives $500 a month from
our generous state to raise her daughter. (Patricia is holding a
doll, or a baby-like bundle.)
Supply Side Man: Excellent. Lets focus on you first, General. Devalue
your currency. Cut health and education budgets. Open up your markets
to imports of genetically modified U.S. corn. Then drive the farmers
off their collective farms and hand them over to Archer Daniels
Wasteland Company to turn into a wasteland in 10 years.
(As Supply Side Man gives these instructions, the general makes Maria
go through bodily contortions which become progressively more
difficult. At first she doesnt react, but gradually she starts shaking
her head, then shaking her fist at the general without letting him
notice. Stephanie is at first unmindful of Maria, and acts friendly
with the governor.. But gradually her attention goes towards Maria,
and she stares, first in surprise and then in horror. As Supply Side
Man finishes the above instructions, CEO comes back in.)
CEO (to Supply Side Man): You got some profits flowing yet?
Supply Side Man (bowing obsequiously): No sir. I mean yes, sir. I
mean, no, sir, but they'll soon be ready.
CEO (impatiently): OK, but hurry up. Do this right and I'll endow
your professorship. (moves to the back of the stage.)
General (to Supply Side Man, while nervously eyeing CEO): What's next?
Supply Side Man (to general): You must ban unions in her workplace
(pointing at Maria). Then, you can make her work 16 hours a day at
half her current pay. Thats one-tenth of what she (pointing at
Stephanie) earns. Once youve done that, then CEO can fire her
(pointing at Stephanie) and give the job to her (pointing at
Maria). (As Supply Side Man says the words fire her, the Governor
pushes her to the ground.) And your police (addressing the Governor)
know what to do with her (pointing at Stephanie) if she's unhappy with
the arrangements. (Governor pulls out baton, hits her.)
CEO: Lovely, lovely. We've used it before, though, and it only goes
so far. What about her? (pointing to Patricia). Isn't there
something we can do with her?
Supply Side Man: I was getting to that!! You dont have to rush me.
(As he goes through the following routine, the governor goes through
the same motions with Patricia as the General did with Maria. Try to
get them as similar as possible). Now, governor, cut her benefits in
half! Impose a five year lifetime limit on those benefits! Now,
impose a work requirement whether there are jobs available or not!
Make her work for a fraction of what she (pointing to Stephanie)
earns, forbid her from forming a union, and threaten to cut off her
benefits if she even shows up late! Then, once again, CEO can fire her
(pointing to Stephanie) and give the job to her.
Governor: And I still know what to do if she raises a fuss about it
(bops Stephanie again).
Maria (rising to her feet): Diez y seis horas cada dia, sin
sindicatos? No puedo sufrirlo!
Patricia (also getting up): And I'm not working as anybodys slave!
Stephanie: And stop hitting me!!
(The three of them link arms and start marching around the stage. CEO
is unperturbed, but the other three are visibly disconcerted.)
Supply Side Man (looking wildly at the scene): I'm afraid this is out
of the domain of my expertise. According to my theories this is not
rational behavior!
Governor: Dont worry, egghead, we have our ways of controlling people
like this.
General (winks at CEO): Human rights isn't all your government teaches
at the school of the Americas!
(The general drags Maria off to a corner of the stage, quickly looks
around to see if anyone is looking, shoots her, and comes back.
Stephanie and Patricia freeze in horror.)
Supply Side Man: Running off stage, fingers plugging his ears and eyes
shut tight as he squeaks): I haven't seen anything, I haven't heard
anything. The market is neutral!
Governor: And as for you, Maam, you're clearly skipping your work
assignment, for which were suspending your benefits. And because that
means you obviously cant provide for your child, I thinkt that we'll
just have to turn her over to DSS. (Grabs baby from Patricias arms
and carries it off stage).
General: So what to do with this one? Shes a gringo, and the New York
Times would find her death fit to print.
Governor: Well, clearly she's an agitator, and she was working with
that foreigner Maria. I think that we may have a threat to our
nations security here! Ma'am, you'll have to come with me. (hauls
her off)
CEO: Now that was impressive. (Putting his arms on the generals and
governors shoulders.) Youve created an attractive investment climate
for me, free of troublesome workers and unproductive people. Now we
can pursue our vision and move into a brave new world of global
prosperity!
(The end.)
Costumes and Props:
CEO: Suit. Cellphone essential; briefcase, laptop optional.
Governor: Suit, baton.
General: Fatigues, beret, sunglasses, toy gun.
Supply Side Man: geeky outfit. May be tweed jacket with leather elbow
patches. Thick glasses desirable. A Superman-style cape with the letter
"S" on it would be great, but not essential.
Maria: regular clothes.
Stephanie: regular clothes (preferably blue jeans). Kneepads under her
pants would make her a lot more comfortable in some sequences.
Patricia Parent: regular clothes, baby doll.
