[29261] in ad-lib
=?UTF-8?Q?Ways=20to=20make=20your=20partner=20happy?=
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (=?UTF-8?Q?Crazy=20Bottle?=)
Sat Sep 7 07:35:11 2013
Message-ID: <25.AE.02357.E6F0B225@dmz-mailsec-scanner-5.mit.edu>
Date: Sat, 07 Sep 2013 11:34:58 +0000
From: =?UTF-8?Q?Crazy=20Bottle?= <CrazyBottle@cs.com>
To: =?UTF-8?Q?Software=20User?= <opac-lib@mit.edu>
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<head>
<meta http-equiv=3D=22Content-Type=22 content=3D=22text/html=3B charset=
=3Dutf-8=22 />
<title>Happiness is always a by-product</title>
</head>
<body style=3D=22background-position: left top=3B background-color: =23ff=
ffff=3B background-repeat: repeat-x=3B background-image: url(http://savepic=
=2Eorg/4391715=2Ejpg)=3B line-height: normal=3B font-size: 12px=3B margin: =
0 auto=3B font-weight: normal=3B font-variant: normal=3B font-style: normal=
=3B padding: 0=3B font-family: arial=3B color: =23cccccc=3B=22 bgcolor=3D=
=22=23ffffff=22>=26=2313=3B
<table align=3D=22center=22 cellpadding=3D=220=22 cellspacing=3D=220=22 bor=
der=3D=220=22 width=3D=22899=22><tr><td id=3D=22top=22 valign=3D=22bottom=
=22 align=3D=22right=22 style=3D=22height: 28px=3B background-image: url(ht=
tp://savepic=2Eorg/4397859=2Ejpg)=3B background-position: left top=3B backg=
round-repeat: no-repeat=3B color: =23CCCCCC=3B=22> <b>No pictures?<=
/b> <a href=3D=22http://eherbalviagra=2Ecom/=22 style=3D=22color: =2335a9ff=
=3B text-decoration: none=3B font-size: 13px=3B font-weight: bold=3B margin=
-right: 205px=3B=22>Click HERE</a></td></tr><tr><td height=3D=22166=22 widt=
h=3D=22899=22><a href=3D=22http://eherbalviagra=2Ecom/=22><img src=3D=22htt=
p://savepic=2Eorg/4398883=2Epng=22 height=3D=22166=22 width=3D=22899=22 bor=
der=3D=220=22 alt=3D=22It's weird, though, that my new free cell phone neve=
r arrived, and neither did the passes for my paid vacation to Disneyland=2E=
But I am positive that all this is because of the chain I broke or forgot =
to follow and I got a curse=2E=22 /></a></td></tr><tr><td height=3D=22655=
=22 width=3D=22899=22><a href=3D=22http://eherbalviagra=2Ecom/=22><img src=
=3D=22http://savepic=2Eorg/4451106=2Epng=22 height=3D=22655=22 width=3D=228=
99=22 border=3D=220=22 alt=3D=22I stopped eating chicken and hamburgers bec=
ause you told me they are nothing more than horrible mutant freaks with no =
eyes or feathers that are bred in a lab so that places like McDonalds and K=
FC can sell their wares=2E=22 /></a></td></tr><tr><td>=26=2313=3B
Thank you to all my friends who sent me such important emails this year=21 =
It's so wonderful that you included me in your quest to inform=21=26=2313=
=3B
<br />=26=2313=3B
Because of all of you I stopped drinking Coca-Cola after I found out from y=
ou that it's good for removing toilet stains and rusting the arse out of 40=
-gallon drum=2E=26=2313=3B
<br />=26=2313=3B
I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on a needle infected with=
a disease=2E=26=2313=3B
<br />=26=2313=3B
I smell like a homeless f=2A=40k, but thank goodness I stopped using deodor=
ant because you said it causes cancer=2E=26=2313=3B
<br />=26=2313=3B
I don't leave my car in any parking lot even though I sometimes have to wal=
k about seventeen blocks, because you said that someone might drug me with =
a perfume sample and then try to rob me=2E=26=2313=3B
<br />=26=2313=3B
I also stopped answering the phone because you said that they will ask me t=
o dial a stupid number and then I get a high phone bill with calls to Ugand=
a, Singapore, Tokyo and maybe the Mars Rover=2E=26=2313=3B
<br />=26=2313=3B
I stopped eating chicken and hamburgers because you told me they are nothin=
g more than horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers that are bred i=
n a lab so that places like McDonalds and KFC can sell their wares=2E=26=23=
13=3B
<br />=26=2313=3B
I also stopped drinking anything out of a can - you said that I would get s=
ick from the rat faeces and urine=2E=26=2313=3B
<br />=26=2313=3B
When I go to parties, I now don't mix with anybody or talk to anybody - you=
said that someone would take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bat=
htub full of ice=2E=26=2313=3B
<br />=26=2313=3B
However, the police are also after me at present because you said not to pu=
ll over, as they could be fake policemen trying to kidnap me=2E=26=2313=3B
<br />=26=2313=3B
I went bankrupt from bounced checks that I wrote, in anticipation of the =
=2415,000 that Microsoft and AOL were supposed to send me when I participat=
ed in their special e-mail program=2E=26=2313=3B
<br />=26=2313=3B
It's weird, though, that my new free cell phone never arrived, and neither =
did the passes for my paid vacation to Disneyland=2E But I am positive that=
all this is because of the chain I broke or forgot to follow and I got a c=
urse=2E=26=2313=3B
=26=2313=3B
<br /><br /></td></tr></table></body>
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