[86863] in Discussion of MIT-community interests
Never Pay Full Price for Printer Ink Again!
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Printer Ink)
Mon Aug 15 11:37:03 2016
Date: Mon, 15 Aug 2016 11:26:29 -0400
From: "Printer Ink" <printer-ink@lovpb.com>
To: <mit-talk-mtg@charon.mit.edu>
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<title>Never Pay Full Price for Printer Ink Again!</title>=20
<h1>Never Pay Full Price for Printer Ink Again!</h1>=20
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<p>One afternoon I was following a path just outside of the pasture fenc=
e, through heavy wheat stubble, left after cutting time. I saw a pair of pi=
nk ears ahead of me, which I knew belonged to a rabbit. I blazed away at th=
e ears. The gun, as usual, did execution at both ends. I went over on my ba=
ck. When I regained my feet I saw a great commotion on the firing line. Rab=
bits' legs and feathers were alternately in the air. Investigating, I found=
two cottontail, one jackrabbit and three quail in the last stages of disso=
lution, all the result of one shot at two rabbit's ears. I felt bigger than=
Napoleon ever did as I gathered up my kill and started for home. On one of=
my wanderings I came across; the barrel of a rifle on an Indian mound, whi=
ch had been plowed up when we were preparing the land for planting. It was =
so coated with rust that the metal was no longer visible. Floods had covere=
d the ground many times. Not knowing how long it had been buried there, I d=
ug the rust and dirt out of the barrel as best I could and took it home. On=
my first trip to Marysville I took it to a blacksmith named Allison, who d=
id all of our work, and asked him to cut it off about a foot from the breec=
h end, so that I could use it as a cannon. He put it in his forge, and pull=
ed away upon his bellows with his left hand. He held the muzzle end of the =
rifle barrel in his right hand, and poked at the coals with it so as to get=
it properly covered. He intended to heat it and then cut it off. All at on=
ce, Bang! and that horrid old thing went off. The bullet went through Allis=
on's clothing and slightly cut the skin on his side. He was the worst scare=
d man in all California. When he felt the sting of the bullet he threw up h=
is hands and fell on his back, yelling lustily. I was almost as badly panic=
-stricken, thinking surely he was killed. I began to see visions of the gal=
lows and the hangman's rope. He recovered his self-possession, and when he =
found he was not hurt, his fear turned to anger. He threw the rifle barrel =
out into the street, and then drove me out of the shop. When I got outside =
and my fear had left me, I sat down on an old wagon tongue and laughed unti=
l I was entirely out of breath. Allison came out, and my laughter must have=
been contagious. He leaned up against a post and laughed until he cried. H=
is anger had left him, and we were soon fast friends again. At the proper t=
ime I ventured the opinion that the rifle could not go off again, and that =
it would be well enough to finish the cutting process. He consented and soo=
n had the barrel cut off. I took the breech end home with me, and endangere=
d my life with it many years. I generally loaded it with blasting powder, f=
or the reason that it was usually on hand and cost me nothing, and so loade=
d, the cannon made more noise than had I used gunpowder. During the campaig=
n in which Gen. George B. McClellan ran for the Presidency against Abraham =
Lincoln, the Democrats of Northern California had a great celebration which=
lasted two or three days. Among other things was a barbecue at the race tr=
ack, two or three miles out of town. Great pits were dug which were filled =
with oak stumps and logs, and burned for about twenty-four hours before the=
cooking began. These logs were reduced to a perfect bed of live coals. Ove=
r these, old-fashioned Southern negroes, of whom there were many in the nei=
ghborhood, cooked quarters of beef, whole sheep, pigs, chickens, ducks, tur=
keys and geese. There were at least five thousand people on the ground. My =
blacksmith friend, Allison, was firing a salute with an old cannon. He fire=
d the cannon after it was loaded, with an iron rod, one end of which was ke=
pt heated in a small fire. I attended to the fire for him. After the discha=
rge the gun was wiped out with a wet swab. The powder was done up in red fl=
annel cartridges. Allison, with heavy, buckskin gloves on his hands, would =
hold his thumb over the vent or tube of the cannon. Two men, first slitting=
the lower end of the cartridge, would ram it into the gun. During each loa=
ding process I straddled the gun, looking towards Allison. After a number o=
f discharges, the heat burned a hole through the glove that Allison was usi=
ng, and his thumb, coming in contact with the hot metal, was withdrawn for =
an instant, while the assistants were sending home a charge. There was an i=
mmediate premature explosion. I was sitting astride the gun, and felt it ri=
se up and buck like a horse. Allison's eyes were nearly ruined, and his fac=
e filled with powder, the marks of which stayed with him the rest of his li=
fe. The two assistants were horribly mutilated, but neither of them was kil=
led. For a time I thought I never would hear again. My ears simply shut up =
and refused to open for some time. It would seem that this disaster should =
have been sufficient for one day, but it was not. That night there was to h=
ave been public speaking in front of the Western Hotel, by many prominent p=
oliticians. Opposite the hotel was a two-story brick building, with a veran=
da built around it. All of the offices on the second floor opened on this v=
eranda. It was crowded with people. The weight became excessive. The iron p=
osts next to the sidewalk, which sustained the veranda, slid out, and the p=
latform swung down like a table leaf, spilling everybody onto the sidewalk.=
Eight or nine people were killed outright, and many more very severely inj=
ured. When about twelve years of age I got hold of two greyhounds, sisters,=
named "Flora" and "Queen." During the winter time I sp=
ent much time chasing jackrabbits. In summer time the ground got so hard th=
at the dogs would not run. The ground hurt their feet. But in the winter we=
had great sport. There was an immense open plain east of our property, mil=
es long and miles wide, and level as a floor. There was a dry weed, without=
leaves and of a reddish color, which grew in patches all over this plain. =
These weed patches were the hiding places of the jackrabbits. The game was =
exciting and stirred one's sporting blood. I found a great difference in th=
e speed of jackrabbits--as much in fact as in the speed of blooded horses. =
Occasionally I would get up one that would actually run away from the dogs,=
which were a fast pair. I followed the sport so persistently, and paid so =
little attention to fences when they interfered with my going, that I got t=
he appellation in the neighborhood of "that d Ã? d Graves boy.&=
quot; When we got up a hare, away we went after the dogs, just as fast as o=
ur horses would carry us. The sport was hard on horseflesh, so much so that=
my father finally forbade me running any of our horses after the hounds. T=
here lived in our neighborhood a man who owned, and who had put upon the tr=
ack some of the fastest horses in the State. At this time he had retired an=
d raised horses for the fun of it. He also had some good hounds. He enjoyed=
the sport as much as I did. Having plenty of good horses, he furnished me =
with as many as I needed. We spent many days in trying to determine which o=
f us had the best dogs. Incidentally, we wrecked some promising thoroughbre=
ds. The question of the superiority of our dogs was never settled. We alway=
s left the door open for one more race. Our place was the haven of all the =
boys of my acquaintance. When I was attending school at Marysville some boy=
came home with me nearly every Friday night. We would work at whatever was=
being done on the place Saturday forenoon, but the afternoon was ours. Wit=
h the old gun we took to the pasture, hunted for game, for birds' nests and=
even turtles' nests. The mud turtle, common to all California waters, laid=
an astounding number of very hard shelled, oblong, white eggs, considerabl=
y larger than a pigeon's egg. They deposited them in the sand on the shores=
of the slough, covering them up, leaving them for the sun to hatch. They a=
lways left some tell-tale marks by which we discovered the nest. Often we g=
ot several hundred eggs in an afternoon. They were very rich, and of good f=
lavor. There were many coons and a few wildcats in the pasture woods. With =
the aid of a dog we had great sport with them. Hard pressed, they would tak=
e to the trees, from which we would shoot them. On one occasion we found fo=
ur little spitfire, baby lynx, which we carried home and later traded to th=
e proprietor of a menagerie. We got some money and two pair of fan-tail pig=
eons in exchange for them. When quite small they were the most vicious, unt=
amable little varmints imaginable, and as long as we had them our hands wer=
e badly scratched by them. On the bottom land, each year, we had a large an=
d well assorted vegetable garden. It produced much more than we could possi=
bly use. We boys would sell things from the garden for amusement and pin mo=
ney. During one summer vacation, a boy, one Johnnie Gray, a brother of L. D=
C. Gray of this city, was visiting me. We took a load of vegetables to Ma=
rysville. After selling it, getting our lunch, paying for the shoeing of ou=
r horse (which in those days cost four dollars), and buying some ammunition=
for the gun, we had $1.50 left. We quarreled as to how we should spend thi=
s remnant. Not being able to agree, we started home without buying anything=
On the outskirts of Marysville was a brewery. The price of a five-gallon =
keg of beer was $1.50. We concluded to take a keg home with us. It was an a=
wfully hot summer day, and the brewer was afraid to tap the keg, thinking t=
hat the faucet would blow out under the influence of the heat before we got=
home. He gave us a wooden faucet, and told us how to use it. "Hold it=
so," he said, showing us, "hit it with a heavy hammer, watch the=
bung, and when you have driven it in pretty well, then send it home with a=
hard blow." We were sure we could do it. We drove home, put the beer =
in the shade by the well, spread a wet cloth over it, and then put our hors=
e away. My parents chided us for throwing our money away on beer. In the co=
ol of the evening we concluded to tap the keg. One of us held the faucet an=
d the other did the driving, but we did not have the success predicted for =
us by the brewer. At the critical moment we drove in the bung, but not with=
sufficient momentum to fasten the faucet. It flew out of our hands into th=
e air, followed by the beer. In about a minute the keg was entirely empty. =
We were overwhelmingly drenched and drowned by the escaping beer, but never=
got a single drop of it to drink. On another occasion some of us children =
were coming home from Marysville. We were driving an old white horse, named=
"Jake," who knew us and loved us as only a good horse can. He su=
bmitted to our abuses, shared in our pleasure and would not willingly have =
hurt any of us. We were in a small, one-seated spring wagon. While driving =
through a lane, moved on by the spirit of deviltry, one of us whipped Jake =
into a run, and the other one threw the reins over a fence post. The result=
was as could have been expected by any sane-minded individual. The horse s=
topped so suddenly that he sat down on the singletree, and broke both the s=
hafts of the wagon. We were hurled out with great force, and got sundry bru=
ises and abrasions. We wired up the shafts and got home as best we could, a=
nd, I am sorry to say, we lied right manfully as to the cause of the accide=
nt. We told a story of a drunken Mexican on horseback who chased us a consi=
derable distance, and finally lassoed the horse, bringing him to so sudden =
a stop as to cause the damage. Instead of being punished, as we should have=
been, we were lauded as heroes of an attempted kidnapping. One of my uncle=
s made for us a four-wheeled wagon, the hub, spokes and axles being made ou=
t of California oak--such a wagon as you can buy in any store today, only a=
little larger. We made a kite of large dimensions, and covered the frame w=
ith cotton from a couple of flour sacks. At certain times of the year, the =
wind across the Marysville plains blew with great velocity. This kite, in a=
strong wind, had great pulling capacity. We would go out into the plain, p=
ut up the kite, and fasten the string to the tongue of the wagon, three or =
four of us pile on, and let her go. The speed that we would travel before t=
he wind by this means was marvelous, but we tried the kite trick once too o=
ften. We got to going so fast we could not slow down nor successfully guide=
the wagon. It ran over an old stump, spilled us all out, and kite and wago=
n sailed away clear across Feather River into Sutter County and we never sa=
w either of them again. The boys of the present age have no such opportunit=
ies for out-of-door sports as we did in the olden days. Now it is baseball,=
automobile exhibitions and moving picture shows. Increased population, hig=
h-power guns, cultivation of the soil, the breaking up of large ranches int=
o smaller holdings, have resulted in the disappearance of much of the game =
with which the land then abounded. Fifty years ago in California, condition=
s of rural life were necessarily hard. Our habitations were but little more=
than shelter from the elements. We had none of the conveniences of modern =
life. At our house we always made our own tallow candles. We hardened the c=
andles by mixing beeswax with the tallow. We made the beeswax from comb of =
the honey taken from bee trees. We corned our own beef and made sauerkraut =
by the barrel for winter use. We canned our own fruit, made jelly and jam f=
rom wild berries and wild grapes. We selected perfect ears of corn, shelled=
it at home, ran it through a fanning machine, and then had the corn ground=
into meal for our own consumption. We raised our own poultry and made our =
own butter and cheese, with plenty to sell; put up our own lard, shoulders,=
ham and bacon and made our own hominy. The larder was always well filled. =
The mother of a family was its doctor. A huge dose of blue mass, followed b=
y castor oil and quinine, was supposed to cure everything, and it generally=
did. In the cities luxuries were few. To own a piano was the privilege of =
the very wealthy. Speaking of pianos, in the flood of 1863, before Marysvil=
le was protected by its levee, which is now twenty-five feet high, the fami=
ly cow swam into the parlor of one of the best mansions of the town, throug=
h the window. When the flood waters had subsided, she was found drowned on =
top of the piano. Life under the conditions here given was necessarily hard=
Our amusements were few. We, who lived in the country, had plenty of good=
air and sound sleep-two things often denied the city resident. Our sports =
were few and simple, but of such a nature that they toughened the fiber and=
strengthened the muscles of our bodies, thus fitting us to withstand the h=
eavy drafts on our vitality that the hurly-burly of modern life entails upo=
n the race.</p>=20
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