[1933] in Depressing_Thoughts
here we go again
jcbourne@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (jcbourne@ATHENA.MIT.EDU)
Mon Mar 4 22:25:58 1991
i don't know why i insist on doing this to myself. but i continue to do
it over and over... getting hungup on someone who probably wishes that i
would just go away and leave him alone. but my non-rational heart seems
to think that there might actually be something there worth the effort,
the time, the... pain, i suppose. little things he does or says are
magnified and given importance that maybe they don't deserve. every so
often i get the impression that he is hiding how he feels. not that i
can blame him for that. and i can't (shouldn't) try to talk to him about
it. but is it worth hanging around? i mean, i'll always be his friend.
but will i ever again be more than that?
arrrrrgh. why the hell do i do this to myself?
