[5171] in Central_America
New quotes for Thu Nov 11
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Central America)
Thu Nov 11 04:35:28 1993
Date: Thu, 11 Nov 1993 04:34:07 -0500
From: Central America <root@charon.MIT.EDU>
To: ca-mtg@charon.MIT.EDU
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afung (Archon Fung):
A plan... we don't need no stinkin' plans.
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archon (Nurse Chapel):
{from system: This user's .plan file is not world-readable}
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cdrichmo (Christ David Richmond):
To walk in the Grace and Peace of our the Lord Christ Jesus.
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ckclark (Calvin Clark):
The Shell Police Are Coming To Get You!
From a posting by Bruce Barnett <barnett@crd.ge.com> to comp.unix.shell:
> I say if the person is just learning UNIX, and they want to write a
> simple script to do something, and no-one else will ever use it, It's
> okay with me if they use csh. I also believe people can do what ever
> they like in the privacy of their own homes.
> You might feel otherwise.......
>
> --------------------------------------
> Fade to someone's living room. A man is relaxing on his couch,
> watching TV.
>
> Suddenly the door explodes, and two people in uniform enter the room
> with their guns raised... The tall one speaks:
>
> "Hold it right there, buddy. Don't try anything stupid"
>
> "What? Who me? What did I do?"
>
> "We're the Shell Police. We here you've been writing shell scripts
> using the C Shell, ya filty bastard. It's people like you who
> convince schooolkids to use the C Shell when they should be studying
> the Bourne Shell".
>
> "I wasn't harming anyone!"
>
> "Yeah - likely story", the other cop snarls. "Why - I bet you can't
> even write a /etc/rc script, you lousy excuse for a programmer."
>
> "What are you talking about? I don't even know what an "etsee are see"
> script is!"
>
> "That's no excuse, you scumbag! You're going downlink to USENET
> central. We're gonna haul you in front of millions of USENET readers,
> who will laugh at every stupid line of your C shell script! Heh Heh.
> We even have hardcopy proof."
>
> "Oh no! I forgot root can read all of my files! I'm doomed..."
>
> -------- back to your regular program.....
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cyu (Chong Yu):
==========================================================================
The Terribly, Tragically Sad Man (by Loren Seibold)
Once there was a boy who lived in a big house on a hill. He loved dogs and
horses, sports cars and music. He climbed trees and went swimming, played
football and admired pretty girls. Except for having to pick up after
himself, he had a nice life.
One day the boy said to God, ``I've been thinking, and I know what
I want when I become a man.''
``What?'' asked God.
``I want to live in a big house with a porch across the front and
two Saint Bernards and a garden out back. I want to marry a woman who is
tall and very beautiful and kind, who has long, black hair and blue eyes,
and who plays the guitar and sings in a clear, high voice.
``I want three strong sons to play football with. When they grow
up, one will be a great scientist, one will be a Senator and the youngest
will quarterback for the 49ers.
``I want to be an adventurer who sails vast oceans and climbs tall
mountains and rescues people. And I want to drive a red Ferrari and never
have to pick up after myself.''
``That sounds like a nice dream,'' said God. "I want you to be
happy.''
One day, playing football, the boy hurt his knee. After that he couldn't
climb tall mountains or even tall trees, much less sail vast oceans. So
he studied marketing and started a medical-supplies business.
He married a girl who was very beautiful and very kind and who had
long, black hair. But she was short, not tall, and had brown eyes, not
blue. She couldn't play the guitar, or even sing. But she prepared
wonderful meals seasoned with rare Chinese spices and painted magnificent
pictures of birds.
Because of his business, he lived in a city near the top of a tall
apartment building that overlooked the blue ocean and the city's twinkling
lights. He didn't have room for two Saint Bernards, but he had a fluffy
cat.
He had three daughters, all very beautiful. The youngest, who was
in a wheelchair, was the loveliest. The three daughters loved their
father very much. They didn't play football with him, but sometimes they
went to the park and tossed a Frisbee--except for the youngest, who sat
under a tree strumming her guitar and singing lovely, haunting songs.
He made enough money to live comfortably, but he didn't drive a
red Ferrari. Sometimes he had to pick up things and put them away--even
things that didn't belong to him. After all, he had three daughters.
Then one morning the man awoke and remembered his dream. ``I am very
sad,'' he said to his best friend.
``Why?'' asked his friend.
``Because I once dreamed of marrying a tall woman with black hair
and blue eyes who would play the guitar or sing. She has brown eyes, and
she's not tall.''
``Your wife is beautiful and very kind,'' said his friend. ``She
creates splendid pictures and delectable food.''
But the man wasn't listening.
``I am very sad,'' the man confessed to his wife one day.
``Why?'' asked his wife.
``Because I once dreamed of living in a big house with a porch,
and of having two Saint Bernards and a garden out back. Instead, I live
in an apartment on the 47th floor.''
``Our apartment is comfortable, and we can see the ocean from our
couch,'' replied his wife. ``We have love, laughter and paintings of
birds and a fluffy cat--not to mention three beautiful children.''
But the man wasn't listening.
``I am very sad,'' the man said to his therapist.
``Why?'' asked the therapist.
``Because I once dreamed that I would grow up to be a great
adventurer. Instead, I'm a bald businessman with a bad knee.''
``The medical supplies you sell have saved many lives,'' said the
therapist.
But the man wasn't listening. So his therapist charged him $110
and sent him home.
``I am very sad,'' the man said to his accountant.
``Why?'' asked the accountant.
``Because I once dreamed of driving a red Ferrari and of never
having to pick up after myself. Instead, I take public transportation,
and sometimes I still have to clean up.''
``You wear good suits. You eat at fine restaurants, and you've
toured Europe,'' said his accountant.
But the man wasn't listening. His accountant charged him $100
anyway. He was dreaming of a red Ferrari himself.
``I am very sad,'' the man said to his minister.
``Why?'' asked the minister.
``Because I once dreamed of having three sons: a great scientist,
a politician and a quarterback. Instead, I have three daughters, and the
youngest can't even walk.''
``But your daughters are beautiful and intelligent,'' said the
minister. ``They love you very much, and they've all done well. One is a
nurse, another is an artist and the youngest teaches music to children.''
But the man wasn't listening. He was so sad that he became very
sick. He lay in a white hospital room surrounded by nurses in white
uniforms. Tubes and wires connected his body to blinking machines that he
had once sold to the hospital.
He was terribly, tragically sad. His family, friends and minister
gathered around his bed. They were all deeply sad too. Only his
therapist and his accountant remained happy.
Then one night, when everyone except the nurses had gone home, the man
said to God, ``Remember when I was a boy and I told you all the things I
wanted?''
``It was a lovely dream,'' said God.
``Why didn't you give me those things?'' asked the man.
``I could have,'' said God. ``But I wanted to surprise you with
things you didn't dream of.
``I suppose you've noticed what I've given you: a kind, beautiful
wife; a good business; a nice place to live; three lovely daughters--one
of the best packages I've put together--''
``Yes,'' interrupted the man. ``But I thought you were going to
give me what I really wanted.''
``And I thought you were going to give me what I really wanted,''
said God.
``What did you want?'' asked the man. It never occurred to him
that God was in want of anything.
``I wanted to make you happy with what I'd given you,'' said God.
The man lay in the dark all night, thinking. Finally he decided to dream
a new dream, one he wished he'd dreamed years before. He decided to dream
that what he wanted most were the very things he already had.
And the man got well and lived happily on the 47th floor, enjoying
his children's beautiful voices, his wife's deep brown eyes and her
glorious paintings of birds. And at night he gazed at the ocean and
contentedly watched the lights of the city twinkling on, one by one.
==========================================================================
Sheesh. What a long .plan.
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elg (Eric L. Gravengaard):
{from system: This user's .plan file is not world-readable}
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hch (Hernando Cortina):
What I need is a MATURE RELATIONSHIP with a FLOPPY DISK...
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kdmiller (Kenneth D Miller):
void main(){char b[17];int a=0,c=0,d; /* / for a good time, email: \ */
while(c!=-1){printf("%07x0:",a++);for /* ( kdmiller@athena.mit.edu ) */
(d=0;d<16;d++){c=getchar();b[d]=(c<' ' /* \ (Kenneth D. Miller III) / */
||c>'~')?'.':c;printf( "%s%02x",d&3?"":" ",c&255);}printf(" | %s\n",b);}}
Yes!! I'm online! Just use 'kdmiller@w20-575-83'...
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krill (Dylan F Glas):
{from system: This user's .plan file is not world-readable}
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kslee (Kenneth S. Lee):
Finish thesis.
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lsc (Lecture Series Committee):
LSC Movies for the week of Nov 12 to Nov 14
Fri. Nov 12 The Scarlet Pimpernel (1934) [???] 10-250 7:30
A swashbuckling classic about an English nobleman who secretly risks his
life to save French aristocrats from the guillotine during the
revolution. Starring Leslie Howard as Sir Percy Blakeley and Merle
Oberon as his wife who is blackmailed by the evil Chauvlin (Raymond
Massey) to discover the identity of "the d'mned elusive pimpernel," her
husband.
Fri. Nov 12 The Story of Qiu Ju [PG] 26-100 7 & 10
In the latest film by Zhang Yimou (Ju Dou, Raise the Red Lantern) Gong
Li stars as a simple farm woman in Northern China who goes on a
justice-seeking rampage after her husband is beaten up by a local
prefect. She drags her case to an endless hierarchy of legislative
offices, meeting bureaucracy and indifference, but her determination
carries her through to the ironic end.
Sat. Nov 13 Sleepless in Seattle [PG] 26-100 7 & 10
From the screenwriter of When Harry Met Sally comes the love affair
which isn't: the couple of interest have never met. Only destiny (and
the classic An Affair to Remember) draws Annie (Meg Ryan) and Sam (Tom
Hanks) together with the help of Sam's son and a phone-in radio talk
show. Also starring Rosie O'Donnell and Rob Reiner.
Sun. Nov 14 Robocop [R] 10-250 7 & 10
When real cops prove unable to keep Detroit's crime problem under
control, a corporation develops RoboCopQa cyborg with the brain of a
fallen officer. Once activated, RoboCop is brilliantly successfulQtoo
much so for one of the company's corrupt officials to handle. Starring
Peter Weller as Officer Alex Murphy, and Ronny Cox as corporate crime
boss Dick Jones.
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For more information, call the LSC MovieLine, 258-8881,
or the LSC office, 253-3791.
MIT or Wellesley ID required, one guest allowed per ID.
Admission to movies is $2.00 and a 20-Admission
Superticket is available for $35.
Classic Movie shows end before the start of the second
show of the corresponding Friday series movie.
Problems and changes to the mailing list should be addressed to
info-lsc-request@zurich.ai.mit.edu
This service is neither maintained nor supported by the
MIT Lecture Series Committee.
To see this information again, finger -l lsc@martigny.ai.mit.edu
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marthag (Martha H Greenberg):
home address:
32 Calvin St #1
Somerville, MA 02143
(617)666-9513
alternate home # (try the top one first):
(617)666-5482
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may (G. May Yip):
Meanwhile, you can reach me at:
HOME: 3824 Epperson Trail
Austin, TX 78732
(512) 266-7350
WORK: yip@austin.wireline.slb.com
(512) 331-3278 (Voice Mail)
(512) 331-3127 (FAX)
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mingliu (Minghsun Liu):
A member of the League for Programming Freedom - write
lpf@uunet.uu.net for more info.
Term Address: 402A Bexley Hall (617) 225-9642
Office: 56-622 - Walker Lab
Home Address: 214 Chung-Hsiao Rd.
Taichung, Taiwan 40223
(04) 287-7853
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mjdaly (Mark J Daly):
Strat '92 Standings (update Nov 10 - noon)
St. Louis 39 27 - .591
Houston 40 29 0.5 .580
Atlanta 36 27 1.5 .571
Toronto 33 30 4.5 .524
Montreal 29 34 8.5 .460
Boston 25 35 11.0 .417
Seattle 26 46 16.0 .361
These are correct and updated...Hil is only complete finisher so far...
top 3 teams look pretty safe right now...everyone but Mike has 9 or
12 games remaining to play so we're just about done...one more big
weekend of action and we should have final standings just about done...
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msreynol (Matt Reynolds [KB2ACE]):
{from system: This user's .plan file is a symlink!}
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rnewman (Ron Newman):
Home address: 18 Day St. #310, Somerville MA 02144
Home phone: (617) 628-8895.
"The first settlers in America came here to get away from people
like Catherine MacKinnon. Thousands of immigrants still come here
to flee people like Catherine MacKinnon. She is an authoritarian
in the guise of a progressive, a true spiritual daughter of
Anthony Comstock, and God help the First Amendment if her ideas
ever win the day."
-- The last paragraph of a review of MacKinnon's new book, "Only Words",
in the November 15, 1993, issue of _The Nation_
(Review by Carlin Romano, literary critic of the Philadelphia Inquirer)
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sgw (stephen g. wadlow):
Oh, Elizabeth would you come down,
with your wood guitar now?
Elizabeth would you come down,
with your wood guitar now?
Oh please play for me, please play for me.
I wish that you would play for me,
I wish that I could fall asleep.
"Wood Guitar"
By Poi Dog Pondering
=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=
stephen wadlow w: 617 253 7892 e10-244
e10/bcs computer systems manager h: 617 246 2569
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solo26 (Keith M Swartz):
If you're looking for me in person...give up. The address is:
181 Centre Street, #2
Mountain View, CA 94041 (Yes, that's right--California)
Home: 415-969-3352
(Y'know, Massachusetts Winters Don't Feel Like California's...)
^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^
Work: 415-506-5410
E-mail: here, or kswartz@us.oracle.com (less reliable and a little
slower, but quicker response time during the day)
At some point, some day, I may return here, but for now, the California sun
will have to be my advisor through the journey of the after-collegiate life.
Are all your pets named Eric?
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therese (Therese):
With one breath, with one flow
You will know
Synchronicity
-- The Police
Synchronicity
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tytso (Theodore Y. Ts'o):
Here, by Tower of Norwich,
And the people come and go,
Here, by the Bells of Norwhich,
I tell them what I know:
All shall be well,
I'm telling you;
Let the winter come and go.
All shall be well again, I know.
"All shall be well,
and all shall be well,
and all manner of things shall be well."
"Would thou wit thy Lord's meaning in this thing? Wit it well: Love
was his meaning. Who shwed it thee? Love. What shewed He thee?
Love. Wherefore shewed it He? for Love... Thus was I learned that
Love is our Lord's meaning."
- Dame Julian of Norwich
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setenv TEDPATH 253-8091:253-8400:253-7788:643-2831
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wamprat (Irwin Lee):
Last logged in on m16-034-10
at Sun Nov 07 17:06:18 1993
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weaponh (Herb Singleton Jr.):
{from system: This user's .plan file is not world-readable}
--- End of Central America ---