[4947] in Central_America
New quotes for
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (System PRIVILEGED Account)
Sat Jun 19 06:28:30 1993
Date: Sat, 19 Jun 93 06:28:18 -0400
From: System PRIVILEGED Account <root@charon.MIT.EDU>
To: ca-mtg@bloom-beacon.mit.edu
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belville (Sharon Belville):
The pun o' the day is:
The Oakland football stadium is the Ark of the Lost Raiders.
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dryfoo (Gary L. Dryfoos):
{From system: This user's .plan file would rather be fishing}
NEW TIME
for
+=================+
* ROADKILL BUFFET *
+=================+
will be performing this summer
EVERY Wednesday Night
( This Week Only ) ( starting next week )
(Roadkill Buffet at 7:30pm) (Roadkill Buffet at 7:00pm)
( more comedy at 8:00 ) ( more comedy at 7:30 )
+====================+
* in *
* the Courtyard at *
* One Kendall Square *
+====================+
(which, of course, ISN'T IN Kendall Square)
Watch this info for more space.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(for Free and Highly Entertaining information on how YOU can own a
profitable KREL distributorship in your area, write to:
KREL, Inc.
% Lt. Col. Philip A. Goldman, USAF-Ret.
55 Todd St.
Warwick, RI 02888
USA
Ask for a Free Sample. Enclose SASE.
Use No Hooks! Dilute! Okay! All-One! Okay!)
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hch (Hernando Cortina):
I don't know WHY I said that.. I think it came from the FILLINGS
in my rear molars..
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jyip (Jason Yip):
Last logout: Fri Jun 18 23:39:02 EDT 1993 from alfredo
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pshuang (Ping Huang):
========================================================================
Boy, it's a cooker of a summer. I'm currently in San Francisco burning
up the long-distance bills (hey, my parents get those bills, what do I
care?) dialing up to Athena for my daily Internet fix.
Admissions for 5-year masters to be announced soon -- fingers crossed.
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You can try to reach me via:
| E-mail: pshuang@mit.edu, pshuang@gza.com (both read regularly)
|
| Dorm: Senior House, Atkinson 101, (617) 225-6600
| (voice mail available and checked regularly)
|
| Work: Geer Zolot Associates, (617) 374-3700, x234
|
| Activity: Alpha Phi Omega, W20-415, (617) 253-3788
|
| Home Home: 1435 26th Ave, SF CA 94122, (415) 664-1658
========================================================================
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rlcarr (Richard L. Carreiro):
[from rec.humor.funny]
ORIGINALLY FROM: levine@symcom.math.uiuc.edu (Lenore Levine)
I thought that individuals on the net might be interested in
these rules for organizations engaged in the pursuit
of social justice.
1) It is important for social activists to put their best foot
forward. Therefore, only physically attractive people should
be put in positions of responsibility or shown to the public.
Individuals with less charisma should be happy to lick
envelopes on the sidelines. After all, they're helping
to save the world, aren't they?
2) Organizations should be willing to establish their revolutionary
credentials by showing how militant they are. That is,
feminists should talk about how much they hate men, Palestinians
about pushing the Israelis into the sea, Croats about how the
Serbs are devils and Serbs about how the Croats are devils.
Even the folks over at gay lib can make snotty remarks about
"breeders."
You see, there's only a limited amount of happiness in
the world; and the quickest way to make sure your
group gets some is to take it away from others.
3) Social activists should be supportive of one another. To
do this, they must never question the views or policies of
any member of their group. Instead, it's better form to
express sympathy for an offending associate's psychiatric
problems (as shown by her disagreement with you).
4) Social activists must wear ethnic clothes, particularly
Guatemalan cottons at $50 a throw. I mean, who's going
to take you seriously if you wear rags from Wal-Mart, huh?
5) People who want to change the world should take a personal
responsibility for the ecology of the planet. Therefore, they should
recycle everything possible, cook all their food from scratch,
and bicycle to work, even if it's 20 miles away. If they read
magazines, they should read them in the library; if they're
premenopausal women, they should use washable protection.
These measures may sound a little extreme, but they aren't
going to take more than four or five hours a day, are they?
6) Those engaged in the fight for social justice should be warm and
human. This warmness and humanness is shown by shunning cold,
heartless, middle-aged white male activities like mathematics and
science.
In academia teaching is always more acceptable than research (i.e.,
trying to *really* understand the ecology of the planet).
7) Activists must try hard to maintain their intellectual
respectability. Therefore, they should not use the language
of daily life to discuss the problems of ordinary people.
Words from philosophy and psychology are so much more precise,
aren't they? In specific, no one should ever write anything radical
without using the words "postmodern" and "deconstructive" at
least once.
In the same vein, remember how Kant said a good deed done to
someone you like doesn't count? Well, these Kantian principles
can be deconstructed (in a postmodern manner, that is) to mean
that a book you enjoy reading isn't really teaching you anything.
(Therefore, to understand the society you live in, you should
read a lot of dull books.)
8) Finally, above all, activists should not have any fun (unless
they're wearing black leather while doing this, which makes
them modern and liberated). That is, time spent eating blackberry
shortcake or chasing fireflies on the lawn is wasted! You're
not helping others if you do this, and you deserve every pang
of guilt you get!
Lenore Levine
levine@symcom.math.uiuc.edu
--
Selected by Maddi Hausmann. MAIL your joke (jokes ONLY) to funny@clarinet.com
Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. A Daemon will auto-reply.
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sokoloff (Jim Sokoloff):
Jim last logged out @ Fri Jun 18 17:45:32 EDT 1993 on host carbonara...
Plan? What plan?
------ Phi Delta Theta Social Events for the upcoming weeks ------
Wed Apr 21: 9:30 PM Wed Social-Cake and Cappucino! (Yum)
Fri Apr 23: 9:00 PM Party at the old folks home (Dan, Sean and Jim) (i)
666-9565 for info; come meet Matt Gimre and drink with him
Daniel, Sean and Jim are throwin' an
Ear-Drum-Thumpin'
Tequila-Guzzlin'
On-The-Furniture-Dancin'
In-The-BathTub-Yackin'
Ass-Of-Yourself-Makin'
PARTY! Friday Apr 23, 1993
Sat Apr 24: ?:00 PM Alumni Dinner (i)
Sun Apr 25:12:01 AM Console Jim on becoming an _old man_ (22)
(i) indicates that the event is (roughly) closed and invitations are available.
Other events are "open" to all friends of the house and guests
Any questions, don't call me, call the house number (247-8691) and ask for
Pat Baker or Zack Johnson... Thanks... ---Jim Sokoloff
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starflt (Derrick Kong):
The Pause That Refreshes
The San Francisco Chronicle, in an editorial praising Senate
confirmation of Kenneth Adelman as directory of the Arms Control and
Disarmament Agency, commended Adelman for his "refreshingly frank
admission" that he had never given much thought to the possibility of
nuclear disarmament.
from No Comment
--- End of Central America ---
