[4587] in Central_America
New quotes for Thu Oct 1
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Initializer.SysDaemon)
Thu Oct 1 14:11:05 1992
Date: Thu, 1 Oct 92 14:10:25 -0400
From: root@charon.MIT.EDU (Initializer.SysDaemon)
To: ca-mtg@bloom-beacon.mit.edu
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aras:
1. The more beautiful the woman is who loves you, the easier it
is to leave her with no hard feelings.
2. Nothing improves with age.
3. No matter how many times you've had it, if it's offered take
it, because it'll never be quite the same again.
4. Sex has no calories.
5. Sex takes up the least amount of time and causes the most
amount of trouble.
6. There is no remedy for sex but more sex.
7. Sex appeal is 50% what you've got and 50% what people think you've got.
8. No sex with anyone in the same office.
9. Sex is like snow; you never know how many inches you are going to get or
how long it is going to last.
10. A man in the house is worth two in the street.
11. If you get them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow.
12. Virginity can be cured.
13. When a man's wife learns to understand him, she usually stops
listening to him.
14. Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself.
15. The qualities that most attract a woman to a man are usually the
same ones she can't stand years later.
16. Sex is dirty only if it's done right.
17. It is always the wrong time of month.
18. The best way to hold a man is in your arms.
19. When the lights are out, all women are beautiful.
20. Sex is hereditary. If your parents never had it, chances are you
won't either.
21. Sow your wild oats on Saturday night -- Then on Sunday pray for
crop failure.
22. The younger the better.
23. The game of love is never called off on account of darkness.
24. It was not the apple on the tree but the pair on the ground that
caused the trouble in the garden.
25. Sex discriminates against the shy and the ugly.
27. Before you find your handsome prince, you've got to kiss a lot
of frogs.
28. There may be some things better than sex, and some things worse
than sex. But there is nothing exactly like it.
29. Love your neighbor, but don't get caught.
30. Love is a hole in the heart.
31. If the effort that went in research on the female bosom had gone
into our space program, we would now be running hot-dog stands on
the moon.
32. Love is a matter of chemistry, sex is a matter of physics.
33. Do it only with the best.
34. Sex is a three-letter word which needs some old-fashioned
four-letter words to convey its full meaning.
35. One good turn gets most of the blankets.
36. You cannot produce a baby in one month by impregnating nine women.
37. Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
38. It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.
39. Thou shalt not commit adultery.....unless in the mood.
40. Never lie down with a woman who's got more troubles than you.
41. Abstain from wine, women, and song; mostly song.
42. Never argue with a women when she's tired -- or rested.
43. A woman never forgets the men she could have had; a man, the
women he couldn't.
44. What matters is not the length of the wand, but the magic in the stick.
45. It is better to be looked over than overlooked.
46. Never say no.
47. A man can be happy with any woman as long as he doesn't love her.
48. Folks playing leapfrog must complete all jumps.
49. Beauty is skin deep; ugly goes right to the bone.
50. Never stand between a fire hydrant and a dog.
51. A man is only a man, but a good bicycle is a ride.
52. Love comes in spurts.
53. The world does not revolve on an axis.
54. Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation; the other
eight are unimportant.
55. Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.
56. Don't do it if you can't keep it up.
57. There is no difference between a wise man and a fool when they
fall in love.
58. Never go to bed mad, stay up and fight.
59. Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another.
60. "This won't hurt, I promise."
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belville (Sharon Belville):
The pun o' the day is:
Old mathematicians never die - they just go off on a tangent.
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ckclark (Calvin Clark):
"I say, beware of all enterprises that require new clothes, and not
rather a new wearer of clothes. If there is not a new man, how can the
new clothes be made to fit? If you have any enterprise before you, try
it in your old clothes. All men want, not something to *do with*, but
something *to do*, or rather something to *be*. Perhaps we should never
procure a new suit, however ragged or dirty the old, until we have
conducted, so enterprised or sailed in some way, that we feel like new
men in the old, and that to retain it would be like keeping new wine in
old bottles. Our moulting season, like that of the fowls, must be a
crisis in our lives. The loon retires to solitary ponds to spend it.
Thus also the snake casts it slough, and the caterpillar its wormy coat,
by an internal industry and expansion; for clothes are but our outmost
cuticle and mortal coil. Otherwise we shall be found sailing under
false colors, and be inevitably cashiered at last by our own opinion, as
well as that of mankind."
-Henry David Thoreau, _Walden_
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jcbourne (Juliet C Bourne):
Tomorrow Never Knows
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Revolver
The Beatles
Turn off your mind, relax and float downstream
It is not dying / It is not dying
Lay down all thought, surrender to the void
It is shining / It is shining
That you may see the meaning of within
It is being / It is being
That love is all and love is everyone
It is knowing / It is knowing
That ignorance and hate ??? <-- anyone know what goes here?
It is believing / It is believing
That listens to the color of your dream
It is not living / It is not living
All play the game "existence" to end
Of the beginning / Of the beginning
(Repeat last line to fade)
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jefft (Jeff Tang):
"Tonight, the fish sleep with Lucca Brazzi!"
--- Tom Servo on Gamera's big bludgeoning of Zigra on land
(in a twist on the line from _The Godfather_)
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karen (Karen E. Walrath):
{From system: This user's .plan file is not world readable}
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nightowl (Blodeuwedd):
other account: grove@mitlns (logged in almost all day weekdays)
"But how can you know what you want
Till you get what you want
And you see if you like it?"
"Would I know?"
"All I know is--"
"I never wish--"
"What I want most of all--"
"Just within reason."
"Is to know what I want."
"When you know you can't have what you want,
Where's the profit in wishing?"
Cinderella and the Baker's Wife
"A Very Nice Prince"
from Stephen Sondheim's "Into the Woods"
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starflt (Derrick Kong):
It's a Bird, It's a Plane...
News item from United Press International: "LANGLEY, VA --- Officials
at Langley Air Force Base said today that a cannon that hurls dead
chickens at airplanes at 700 miles an hour is helping to reduce
accidents caused by jets hitting birds. Major Dennis Funnemark said
that the device, called a chicken gun, was a converted twenty-foot
cannot that shoots four-pound chickens into the engines, winshields,
and landing gear to determine how much damage such collisions can
cause."
from No Comment
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therese (Therese):
Go placidly among the noise and haste, remember what peace
there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with with all persons. Speak your truth
quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and
ignorant, they too have their story - Avoid loud and aggressive
persons, they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare
yourself with others, there will be greater and lesser persons
than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans -
Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a
real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise
caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of
trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere, life is full
of heroism - Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love, for in the face of all aridity
and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass - Take kindly
to the counsel of they years, gracefully surrending the things
of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden
misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome
discipline, be gentle with yourself - You are a child of the
universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right
to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the
universe is unfolding as it should - Therefore be at peace with
God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors
and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace with
your soul - With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is
still a beautiful world. Be careful, strive to be happy.
- Max Ehrman
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wamprat (Irwin Lee):
Now logged in on w20-575-62
at Wed Sep 30 07:05:37 EDT 1992
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wkcook (Wendy K Cook):
Epitaph: Honest I lived, Honest I died;
I thought I was perfect, but now here I lie.
Favorite Quote: And remember, wherever you go, there you are.
-Buckaroo Bonzai
I believe in the American dream, the red-white-and-blue, non-whitening
fabric softner, and doses of concentrated Blues' Brothers at times of
crises. I believe in Mozart, long walks leading nowhere and everywhere,
and that Harvard was long ago taken over by aliens from planet 10 of the
eighth dimension. I believe in peace, and old blue jeans, Boston baked
beans and New England spring. I believe in animal attraction and love
at first sight. I believe in lasting friendships and Buddhist philosophy,
God, heaven, and the elusive silver lining. I believe in my friends and
my family, and I believe in myself.
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wyeth (Luke W Sullivan):
You let the contents of the bottle do the thinking,
can't shake the devil's hand and say you're only kidding...
Lukas is in the real world right now...
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zzkaru (Zoher Z Karu):
{From system: This user's .plan file is not world readable}
--- End of Central America ---