[4463] in Central_America
New quotes for Thu Jul 30
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Initializer.SysDaemon)
Thu Jul 30 06:46:10 1992
Date: Thu, 30 Jul 92 06:45:39 -0400
From: root@charon.MIT.EDU (Initializer.SysDaemon)
To: ca-mtg@bloom-beacon.mit.edu
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bierce (Jonathan Charles Bierce):
CLINTON/GORE '92
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cfields (Craig Fields):
From: bzs@ussr.std.com (Barry Shein)
Subject: Re: My Life As A Lightbulb
Date: Wed, 29 Jul 1992 03:47:04 GMT
No no, the question is: How many USENET posters does it take to change
a lightbulb?
A1. Define "change"
A2. How do you know the lightbulb is out?
A3. Don't use the word "posters" to describe us, it's offensive to
large sheets of papers with pictures on them which hang on walls.
A4. That question is not appropriate for this group, please take it
elsewhere.
A5. I think it's perfectly appropriate, this is alt.fan.lightbulbs.
A6. Well, that's because you're a twit.
A7. Who are you calling a "twit"? Besides, you spelled "twit" wrong.
A8. Oh? And how exactly do *you* spell "twit", twit?
A9. Could you two take this to e-mail? Doesn't anyone want to talk
about lightbulb fans instead of flaming?
A10. You're a twit also, who died and made you net.cop?
A11. Look, all of you, take it to alt.flame or e-mail or something.
A12. Hey, USENET is an anarchy, you have no right to tell them what to
post or not post.
A13. Speaking of anarchists, why don't you all vote for Andre Marrou,
Libertarian Party Candidate for President?
A14. Because the Libertarians are all twits.
A15. Waitaminit! Now we're arguing politics on alt.fan.lightbulb????
A16. Stop wasting bandwidth with this stuff!
A17. What "stuff" pray tell?
A18. Yikes! It's dark in here!
A19. Define "dark".
A20. I mean the lightbulb must be out.
A21. So change it.
A22. Define "change"...
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cyrus (Die Die Yankee Dog!):
Hey, wait a minute!! I want a divorce!!.. you're not Clint Eastwood!!
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jefft (Jeff Tang):
"Joel, Joel -- have a waffle, will ya? Shape up!"
--- Crow, "Viking Women and the Sea Serpent"
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krueger (Lokman Alwi):
{From system: This user's .plan file is not world readable}
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merm (michael mermelstein):
day after day, alone on a hill, the man with a
foolish grinn is keeping perfectly still
but nobody wants to know him, they can see
that he's just a fool and he never gives an answer
but the fool on the hill sees the sun going down
and the eyes in his head see the world
spinning round.
well on the way, head in a cloud, the man of a
thousand voices talking perfectly loud
but nobody ever hears him or the sound he
appears to make and he never seems to notice
but the fool on the hill sees the sun going down
and the eyes in his head see the world
spinning round.
and nobody seems to like him they can tell what
he wants to do
and he never shows his feelings but the
fool on the hill
sees the sun going down and the eyes in his
head see the world spinning round.
he never listens to them he knows that they're
the fools
they don't like him
the fool on the hill sees the sun going down
and the eyes in his head see the world
spinning round.
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relic (Aram J Agajanian):
To discover the world once more.
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starflt (Derrick Kong):
Green-Collar Crime
Girl Scout officials found it necessary to crack down on mothers who
pocketed the proceeds of cookie sales.
from No Comment
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timkwan (Unknown):
I learned to say something in Greek:
Ego thelo na fau to muni tis oreas copellas,
tote tha mu fai tin malakia mu.
[Thanks George!]
For zwrite purposes:
@font(-adobe-symbol-medium-r-normal--34-240-100-100-p-191-adobe-fontspecific)
Ego qelw na faw to mouni thV oreaV kopelaV,
tote qa mou faei thn malakia mou.
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Questions I have no answers to:
1. At which point in the development of a fetus does life begin?
2. Who in Bibledom is Cain's wife? (or, so why is incest wrong?)
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What's the difference between a carp and a lawyer?
One is a low-lying, scum-sucking creature; the other is a fish.
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How many computer programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
Sorry, that's a hardware problem!
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The WORST singer I've heard so far: Stevie B. in "Because I Love You"
The guy is is FLAT! Pathetic!
..............................................................................
Our Program who art in Memory
Hello be thy Name.
Thy Operating System come.
Thy Commands be done at the Printer as it is on the Screen.
Give us this day our daily Data,
And forgive us our I/O errors
As we forgive those whose logic circuits are faulty.
Lead us not into frustration, and deliver us from Power Surges.
For Thine is the Algorithm,
The Application,
And the Solution
Looping forever and ever.
Return.
--- End of Central America ---
