[20410] in APO-L
Re: All-Male Chapters and Brotherhood
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Randy Finder)
Mon Apr 5 13:52:48 1999
"Reply-To: "
Date: Mon, 5 Apr 1999 13:51:56 -0400
Reply-To: Randy Finder <naraht@DRYCAS.CLUB.CC.CMU.EDU>
From: Randy Finder <naraht@DRYCAS.CLUB.CC.CMU.EDU>
To: APO-L@LISTSERV.IUPUI.EDU
In-Reply-To: <199904051708.NAA10211@oldwww.colstate.edu>
On Mon, 5 Apr 1999, Buck, Elizabeth Ansley wrote:
> >
> > Could you describe this "sense of brotherhood" that you saw when
> > visiting the all-male chapters. How does their brotherhood differ
> > from that of your [co-ed] chapter? Be as specific as possible.
> It's hard to describe when you really can't experience it the same
> way an all male chapter does. All I know is that there was some bond
> between the men of that chapter theat just
> seemed....different/special. I don't want to use the word stronger,
> but I can't think of a better word.
>
> My chapter had an awesome sense of brotherhood to it. Every chapter
> has there own brotherhood. If I go to one school I may not
> experience the same thing I experienced at the chapter where I
> pledged. However, that's not to say that the brotherhood at the new
> chapter is better/worse. It's just different in it's own way. It's
> an individual thing I guess...Tell me if you want more of an
> explanation.
There are a number of different reasons that may apply. Here are some that
I think are possible. (and all of these are generalities, exceptions can
and do exist)
1) Size. Most of the all-male chapters are smaller than the average APO
chapter. This is not just because they can only take people from the male
"half" of the campus, I feel that the fact that there are limitations on
which students can join leads to less of a feeling that everyone who wants
to walk in that door and pledge can. Many brothers in all-male chapters
I've talked to are confused/disturbed by the idea of a chapter with 300
brothers and a pledge class of 150.
2) Intergender limitations on harder pledging. In our daily lives we are
less likely to do certain things to members of the other gender. To pick
extreme examples from things that ARE hazing... Would a male
pledgemaster/male brothers drop a female pledge off in the middle of
nowhere with a quarter and tell her to get back to campus? WOuld a female
pledgemaster /female brothers feel comfortable telling a male pledge to
lose weight to fit an APO image? While the pledging process at the
all-male chapters shouldn't include these (especially losing weight 1/2 :)
other aspects of the pledge process are affected by this.
3) "Purity" of friendship. There still are certain changes to friendship
when there is the possibility of dating/loving other brothers are
introduced. I'm personally thankful for them. (I married my brother), but
they do add certain stresses. (yes I know there are gay brothers in
all-male chapters, but the single gender plus the smaller size of the
all-male chapters makes dating within an all-male chapter much less
likely)
YiLFS
Randy Finder
Section 84 staff
--
Leadership, Friendship and Service - Alpha Phi Omega
