[20168] in APO-L
Re: APO-L Digest - 8 Feb 1999 to 9 Feb 1999 (#1999-37)
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Sharon Zohar)
Wed Feb 10 22:43:04 1999
Date: Wed, 10 Feb 1999 22:35:26 -0500
Reply-To: sharon_zohar@CSI.COM
From: Sharon Zohar <sharon_zohar@CSI.COM>
To: APO-L@LISTSERV.IUPUI.EDU
>I would be seriously concerned if any brother was openly flirting or
>making out during service projects and other events that occur in the
>public eye. That to me is a serious problem that needs to be addressed
>promptly. The only behavior that should be standing out in the public
>eye should be your dedication to Leadership, Friendship, and Service.
However, by that same token, we have no business having a double standard
for PDA (public displays of affection) between opposite-sex members and
between same-sex members. That would make us discriminatory. Personally, I'm
not all that crazy about any kind of PDA to begin with, but if we are going
to have standards, they should be consistent for ALL of our membership,
whatever their orientation may be.
>My chapter has a few homosexual/bisexual members, and none of them are
>interested in pushing an agenda to expose that nature to the entire
>world. Sexual preferences are not something that should be proclaimed,
>nor should everybody know them. That's frankly nobody's business but
>that person's. As long as it remains on that basis, my chapter's cool
>with it.
The term is not "sexual preference." It is "sexual orientation." The use of
the word "preference" implies a matter of choice, and please be assured that
with the rampant homophobia that most members of the GLBTQ community face in
this and other countries, few would CHOOSE to be something other than
straight. And if there are brothers in your chapter who are members of the
GLBTQ community and who do decide that they have civil rights that they need
to fight for, I would hope that as a friend and brother, you would rethink
your position about "proclaiming." We as a fraternity work hard to
strengthen our diversity and inclusiveness, with regards to race, gender,
ethnicity, and many other areas - and yes, sexual
orientation. If you had a brother in your chapter who was black and who
experienced discrimination or other mistreatment due to race, would you not
stand behind that brother and fight that prejudice? I'd hope you'd do the
same for your brothers who are of alternative orientation.
>The best thing I can offer is to make sure the agenda your chapter
>pushes is not to promote sexual preferences. APO is not intended for
>that purpose. If there are those who would like a group that does so,
>have them find a different group to push that agenda.
It sounds to me like the chapter has made the "mistake" of being a warm and
welcoming place to all brothers, gay or straight. I wish all chapters would
make that sort of mistake!! I pray that there comes a day when all
chapters - and all campus organizations - see the value in welcoming members
without regard to such things as race, gender, ethnicity, or orientation
when those attributes are not relevant to the group's purpose.
It sounds to me like Brandi's SCHOOL might have a problem with homophobia,
or at least inadequate education. Perhaps the chapter could take the issue
up directly by working with other campus groups on some sort of diversity
project, including GLBTQ groups, minority groups, and campus figures.
Educate the campus by example that people of all walks of life find A Phi O
to be a welcome place - not just GLBTQ members. Since the chapter has a high
GLBTQ population, the chapter can't negate that association. The chapter
would look really bad if they downplayed or bad-mouthed their members. It's
a done deal, not something that can be denied or argued. So fight fire with
fire and use it as a broader selling point - emphasize that EVERYONE with a
passion for LF&S can find a home in A Phi O, that A Phi O looks beyond all
those other external things into the heart of our members.
Sharon Zohar
Section 96 Staff
"What's so funny about peace, love, and understanding?" - Elvis Costello
