[19601] in APO-L
A Case of Leadership Development
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Chris Rock)
Mon Nov 16 23:05:49 1998
Date: Mon, 16 Nov 1998 17:20:04 -0500
Reply-To: Chris Rock <rock@CITLINK.NET>
From: Chris Rock <rock@CITLINK.NET>
To: APO-L@LISTSERV.IUPUI.EDU
This is the story of how a conflict between two strong leaders with very
different styles was resolved. This story may take place in the business
world, but the starting scenario reminds me of something that happens in
lots of chapters for various reasons.
=============================================================================
When the two top people at the helm of a large insurance company realized
that their inability to work together was a problem -- not just for them,
but for the whole organization -- it was almost too late. They found
themselves at that point best described in nautical terms as being in
extremism. That's when only a radical, correct and immediate action by
both ships will avoid a collision. I was doing some intensive leadership
training for their company when they asked for help. Here's what happened:
The chief executive officer, Brad, had this to say about his chief
operating officer, Miles: " The guy's headstrong. Out of control. Always
going off half cocked and doing stuff we have to bail ourselves out of.
It's scary for me to even think about letting him get close to the budget.
If he were in charge, we'd never be able to do the same thing twice in a
row. We'd be jumping off cliffs and figuring out what to do on the way
down. Drive me crazy! See if you can fix him, please."
Meanwhile surprise, surprise -- Miles, the chief operating officer, was
having a tough time with Brad. "He's s-o-s-l-o-w to take action. I get
cobwebs on the proposals I make before he even reads them. He always has
16 reasons why we can't do it, and by the time we get him on board, the
moment has passed us by. Drives me crazy! Get him off my back, please."
Although they were able to conduct themselves in a professional manner in
public and maintained a thin veneer of friendliness, the strains between
them had leaked down and out to the rest of the company -- in some cases,
aided and abetted by their own gossip. As a result, staff were forced to
take sides. "Are you with Brad or are you with Miles?"
After a brief conversation with each of them, they agreed that it was time
to bury the hatchet and asked for some assistance. "Let's go off in a room
and lock the door until this thing gets resolved," I suggested.
They both came into the room smiling but a little nervous. :Okay,: I said,
" first of all, you have to understand the huge negative impact your
unresolved stuff is having on your company.
"You have each lost a lot of respect out there, even from the people who
agree with you. The two of you both think -- although you would never say
it out loud--that the only solution is to have one of you go away, and you
are each plotting how that might be expedited.
"Here's the truth as I see it," I continued. "Unless you find a way to
regain mutual trust and respect, this whole company is in jeopardy. Are
you willing to pursue that goal?"
They both said yes. "How do we do it?"
"First, you need to understand that each of you represents not a problem to
be solved, but one end of a polarity that must be managed. Let's take a
few minutes to discover how that plays out with the two of you."
In the next hour, Brad found out he had been trying all his life to be a
good person. He had, in fact, been a national leader in the Boy Scouts.
His highest values were tied to dependability, consistency, preparation,
caution, and responsibility. Miles, on the other hand, had grown up
getting his rewards from being creative, innovative, quick, energetic,
lighthearted, and inspirational.
Using an approach adapted from Barry Johnson, author of Polarity
Management, I invited each of them to give his way of operating a name,
based in some character from literature or history. Brad said, "Mine's
easy! It's got to be Scoutmaster! I've been trying to be better than
Miles and showing him how he should be doing things. It's my job as the
Scoutmaster to keep everybody--especially Miles--headed in the right
direction and out of trouble."
"Yeah, I can see that," said Miles. "How about this for me: the
Gunslinger? I'm quick on the trigger, too quick a lot of time. Impulsive.
That leads to a certain amount of chaos, which is fine for me and a few
others, but wreaks havoc on the organization. I've been subtly trying to
show Brad up, make him look slow and out-of-date."
This was the moment of truth. They would either rise to the necessary
levels of courage, authenticity and leadership or slide back into their
self-protective patterns. Bless their hearts, they both stepped into the
abyss, let go and reached for something heretofore unseen and unknown.
"I'm sorry, Miles, that I've been such a know-it-all with you and made you
wrong so often. I especially apologize for gossiping about you to your
peers."
Me, too Brad. I'm sorry that I've been so hard to get along with, showing
you up with my sarcastic jokes and smirking at you behind you back to my
buddies."
The forgiveness that was needed was released by each of them to the other,
along with a few tears of relief and joy. This was a holy moment.
Electricity in the air. Hearts beating faster. They hugged each other.
After a few minutes, it was time to move it to the organizational level. I
suggested that what was needed was an organization that had mastered both
of these ways of operating; if either of them had somehow "won" the fight
and managed to impose his particular way of operating on the whole
organization, the company would have been in trouble fast.
They agreed to shift their efforts from trying to defeat the other person
to actually supporting him, looking for ways to strengthen him, making him
more powerful, more effective. They predicted ways they would sabotage
this agreement and determined what they would do when that happened. They
both pledged to stop gossiping as of that moment and agreed to meet
regularly for the next three months to keep tabs on how they were doing.
Talk about courage. The next day they called a meeting of the senior
leadership team. Brad went in wearing his big Scoutmaster's hat, Miles
wearing a cowboy hat and a set of his eight year old son's six guns.
Slowly and carefully, the two of them walked the group through their whole
interaction, taking time to explain in detail the most embarrassing stuff.
The group was astounded. The laughed together. They cried a little. They
gave the a standing ovation at the end. The results were instantaneous and
striking.
Customers noticed the difference. The most prescient of all indicators,
the executive secretaries, noticed the difference. Their wives noticed.
The other officers in the holding company noticed. They have worked
through several conflicts since then that, by their admission, would have
stopped the wagon before. And miraculously, Brad, the uptight Boy Scout,
has loosened up to the point that he brought the house down at a recent
employee gathering. Miles, meanwhile, has been given--and is
taking--responsibility for the budget.
The most amazing outcome of this example of courage and leadership occurred
last week when Brad gathered his leadership team and announced, :This is my
last year here. I'll be retiring at the end of next year. I know you have
been wondering who I would be recommending to the board for my replacement
as CEO. I am delighted and somewhat surprised to say that it will be
Miles. And it is with a real sense of confidence and optimism that I do
this, knowing that he has what it takes to lead this company into the future."
It's amazing what a little courage in the right place at the right time can
accomplish.
--John Scherer
