[997] in Daily_Rumour
Harold Essex: Register
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (jessica forbess)
Wed Oct 11 03:52:28 1995
From: jessica forbess <jforbess@MIT.EDU>
To: rumor@MIT.EDU
Date: Wed, 11 Oct 1995 01:51:59 EDT
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THE NEW ORLEANS REGISTER Tuesday, February 21, 1928
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Reporter: Louis Chambourd Editor: Harold Essex
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POLL RESULTS ARE IN
With Lark Xarm's explosive entry into the arena with a stand on
virtually every major issue, this black-horse candidate has leapt into
the lead of the senatorial race with a whopping 45% of the electorate
preferring him; Teddy Sudbury holds his own at 27% of the electorate,
Beaumont holds at 18%, and Dulac trails with a meager 9%. The
electorate seems to have been stirred up indeed!
CARDENZA HELD BY G-MEN
In a surprise move today, Federal G-Men Martinelli and Caporac arrested Mr.
Juan Cardenza outside the New Orleans courthouse. The G-men took Mr.
Cardenza to a secluded area before making the arrest public, but one of the
agents was evidently panicked by a brightly-colored snake. The snake was
killed while the agent attempted to summon the chief of police, and instead
found a doctor and a large number of witnesses to what may have been
intended as a secret operation.
When questioned as to the charge to be laid against Mr. Cardenza, Agent
Martinelli replied only, "No comment."
Sherriff Reginald Dulac was quick to point out that in New Orleans, when
persons are arrested, they are charged with specific crimes. Only G-men, it
appears, arrest without bringing charges.
Anonymous sources later suggested that Mr. Cardenza was working for a
foreign government against the United States.
TWO CONVICTED OF COUNTERFEITING
Mr. William Grimshaw and Ms. Penelope Harris were convicted today on
charges of counterfeiting. Judge Claudia Caruthers found them guilty on
evidence presented by New Orleans police chief Eddie Bertucci, including
plates found on their persons by police. The plates were stolen some time
ago from a US mint.
A third suspect, Mr. Fitzgerald Essex-Fitch who defended himself, was
acquitted. There was no solid evidence against Mr. Fitzgerald Essex-Fitch.
As he stated in his closing arguments, "The prosecution doesn't have a
case."
UNION CONTRACT RE-OKAYED
In a business meeting last night, the representative from the Chicago
Mercantile Exchange, Mr. Bernoulli, signed the contract tha he had meant
to sign earlier. Several businessmen were there to witness it and the
contract can now be found in among public records. Union workers seem to
very happy that Mr. Bernoulli has signed the contract.
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