[766] in Daily_Rumour
Daily Reamer, February 12, 1993
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (tada@Athena.MIT.EDU)
Fri Feb 12 22:52:01 1993
From: tada@Athena.MIT.EDU
Date: Fri, 12 Feb 93 22:51:06 -0500
To: rumor@Athena.MIT.EDU
Volume 42, Issue 1
Military Occupation of MIT Relaxed
Joanna MacKenzie
CAMBRIDGE, MA. The opening ceremonies of Tech Day on Friday night
were upstaged when General Arnold Schwartzenkopf, commander of the
occupying forces, made a brief announcement. General Schwartzenkopf
sought to clarify the current state of affairs for the previously
bemused student body. He explained that he was moving down to
condition yellow, which he defined as "Back to normal with one
exception--no one may enter or leave campus." The general emphasized
his previous position by repeating that all the military measures had
been taken for the students' own protection.
On being asked what the military was protecting MIT from, General
Schwartzenkopf informed the crowd that the United States is still in a
condition of military emergency. He explained that MIT's position at
the forefront of technological advancement makes the Institute a
valuable national resource.
Henry James, an MIT student, asked from the audience, "Why are
Internet and the phone lines down?" In his snappiest comeback to
date, the general replied, "Have you ever heard of a computer virus?"
He went on to explain that MIT had been electronically isolated to
prevent contaminating the Institute's databanks with the latest
computer virus, apparently a particularly malignant one.
Watson J. Watson, president of IBM, is somewhat annoyed by the
military forces. Although he believes that the occupation will not
adversely affect recruiting, he feels that his company could have
benefitted from the technological presentations cancelled when the
presenters were trapped off campus. He protested, saying, "I think
[the military] should at least have let [the presenters] back."
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Gifts Pour In
by Andrew Blum
CAMBRIDGE, MA. Response to the military occupation of MIT has been
swift and unexpected. Gifts for the troops stationed at the campus have
started arriving from all over the country. Shortly after the 18th and a
half airborne division, also known as the Aardvarks, arrived on the
Cambridge campus, boxes of food, candy, and other gifts started flooding
the post office here.
The explanation for this demonstrates the remarkable way in which the
troops of the various military branches remember and pay back past
kindness. During the Gulf War, the Aardvarks were the division
primarily responsible for sorting and delivering the thousands and
thousands of gifts and letters sent by Americans to the GIs. Even with
the tension of what was almost world war three, troops from around the
country remember the joy of receiving those gifts and are trying to say
"thank you" now. Said one major from Hanscom Airfield, "We've heard
they're stuck on campus and can't leave. And they don't know how long
they'll be there. So I sent some pairs of new socks. I figure I can
always pop out and buy more, but those men can't!"
